1. LiveWire's new, super-awesome forum - The only forum requiring the satisfactory passing of an entrance test to join. Additionally, TIF is also the only forum to require a length requirement on every post made, thought of to be a coping mechanism for the ever-so-witty abspwnsyou.
2. A forum inhabited by relative geniuses far beyond their years in intellect. And proud of it.
3. A forum in which spelling and grammar are taken as seriously as the famed 'Post Count +1' motto is to trolls.
4. A forum supposedly free of spam, though still under heavy conjecture.
5. A not-quite-so-secret hideout for those members enlightened enough to have earnt a charming little picture in their profiles.
6. A forum which, upon creation, spelt almost certain doom for the otherwise hugely intellectual Religion and Philosophy forum.
7. A forum which taught many that even though they thought themselves worthy of intellectualism, they were gravely mistaken. They did, in fact, suck.
8. A place to come and share your cookies. But only with people who are more verbose and devious than you. And only if they vote the same way. And have the same beliefs. And accept said cookies only without speculation of bribery. And so on, and so forth.
Once I was homeless, lying in the gutter, but The Intellectual Forum took me in, put a roof over my head, and stroked my hair until the morning. At which point, it kicked me in the groin, and told me to stay the fuck away from its children. I swear I never touched them.