I think it's bad when one parent keeps asking you to just get up and leave and not tell the other parent... or when one parent keeps trying to convince you to go out and buy new locks for the house so that the other parent can't come inside anymore.
Both my parents have done some things that I think are horrible. I don't know why anyone would air out DIRTY laundry though...
I also hate it when they argue and expect you to choose sides... and you get in trouble when you refuse to get involved.
And what I hate more than all of this? When you have parents that absolutely hate each other, and they refuse to get a divorce. That is probably the worst.
I understand them though. I mean you can't always be on your best behavior.
You know, it took me a long time to come to terms with that? And I accept that sometimes, you just have to shout or yell or whatever.
But what I expected more from my parents was to at least pick and choose when. I don't think it's unusual for a child to witness a few arguments in their life... I mean, it's good for them to see that there is no perfection, but that doesn't mean you still can't care about the other person...
But certain parents take things to the extreme... and when they drag the child into those arguments, or they start acting so irrationally to the point that a 11 year old realizes that she's the most adult in the room... there's an issue.
story of my childhood lol. used to happen a couple of times a week. didn't bother to censor themselves either. insulted the hell out of each other, told each other to fuck off right in front of us, then wondered why my younger brothers used to say such things. another one of their tactics was to involve me by saying "oh your mother's threatening to leave again! who would you prefer to live with? if she had it her way, you'd never see me again." and then my mother would say "you know they'd prefer to live with me anyway, you [insert insult here]. wouldn't you?"
sometimes when my parents started arguing and I was sick of it, I would leave the house and they literally did not notice I was gone even though I would go out for a few hours at a time because that's how long their arguments would last for.
I remember having to put my brothers to bed because they would forget to in the midsts of their screaming matches.
it was horrible and I will always resent my parents for it. always.