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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Dating & Relationships / Viewing Topic

What the hell do I do?
Replies: 4Last Post Jan. 10 3:28am by PBScott
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( Irish4Life  )


Professional
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I am falling for my best friend's ex-boyfriend.

Backstory:
They were together for only a month, maybe two and broke up six months ago. She found out she was pregnant shortly after they started dating. According to her due date, she conceived the baby about 3 weeks before they started going out so he is not the father. My friend cannot stand this guy. She has blocked him on all social media outlets and wants nothing to do with him. She knows that we are still friends and talk often.

Now, I am sitting here in this dilemma. I told her that my ex husband is seeing a friend of mine, which is not untrue. He really is. And I am completely okay with it because if he was not good to me, maybe he can make someone else happy. I've personally never had an issue with my friends dating my exes, as they are not my property and we ended things for a reason. I wanted to get an idea of where she stands. She made it clear that friends do not date their friend's exes. It's about respect and such. I really like this guy and want to see where things go. But I am afraid to bring it up to her, as she has such a strong opinion on it.

I know I need to talk to her about this, but I am just not sure how to go about it and when the timing will be right.

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If you have to ask if you are a slut, chances are, you are a slut.


12:21 pm on Jan. 8, 2017 | Joined: June 2010 | Days Active: 205
Join to learn more about Irish4Life Arizona, United States | Bisexual Female | Posts: 841 | Points: 2,924
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Russ1


Technician
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It sounds like there is no good time to bring it up. She seems to have an iron-clad rule. It might not be a good idea to date him anyway, but you just have to decide which is more important to you, dating him or her friendship. It does not sound like you can have both.

5:06 pm on Jan. 8, 2017 | Joined: Jan. 2017 | Days Active: 30
Join to learn more about Russ1 Gibraltar | Straight Male | Posts: 61 | Points: 363
penguincube


fire, walk with me

Patron
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It's usually a pretty bad idea but they were together for such a short period of time that I personally feel it would be unfair of her not to let you do it. However, it doesn't matter what I think is fair, if she doesn't like it, going out with him could end the friendship and that's a decision you have to make. Of course the one situation in which it would be wrong if you is if he mistreated her in some way that you would be condoning by going out with him.

9:27 pm on Jan. 8, 2017 | Joined: May 2003 | Days Active: 1,859
Join to learn more about penguincube Florida, United States | Posts: 17,974 | Points: 40,892
sofie21


Grasshopper
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sometimes its okay to be elfish, after all, it is your life, we are human. at the end of the day friends stay with their loved ones so what what about you?

6:16 am on Jan. 9, 2017 | Joined: Jan. 2017 | Days Active: 2
Join to learn more about sofie21 | Posts: 6 | Points: 26
PBScott


Visionary
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Quote: from sofie21 at 6:16 am on Jan. 9, 2017

sometimes its okay to be elfish, after all, it is your life, we are human. at the end of the day friends stay with their loved ones so what what about you?

Being selfish is one thing but add in deceit and dishonesty and you have a good formula for losing a friendship. Best cautiously nip this in the but before you friend runs into the two of you out and about.

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3:28 am on Jan. 10, 2017 | Joined: Feb. 2009 | Days Active: 604
Join to learn more about PBScott British Columbia, Canada | Straight Male | Posts: 1,993 | Points: 8,092
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