I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but...did you just say that you had a fertility app on your phone? That's...somehow fucking awesome! All I have is the ability to control my temperature slightly...and it's not even on a phone.
Furthermore, why not put it on a phone? I'm sure that there already is such an app because there's an app for everything. My God, that would be teledildonics (an actual thing) at a basic level. Christ, I can't believe that's a real word.
Once, I went off looking for nitrous oxide and I ended up driving to a sex store where they sold the nitrous oxide. The first thing I noticed was the two pretty girls with bunny ears, who were very sociable and obviously high on meth - it takes one to know one. The next thing I noticed was the fact that were dildos EVERYWHERE. Literally, on each wall, dozens of dildos where on display.
Everywhere I looked there were dildos. Eventually I found something that was not a dildo, it was an aisle of BDSM apparel. I quickly went to the drug accessories counter and got what I wanted and left. I wasn't traumatized; I thought it was funny that you could fit that many dildos in one store. I should have gotten one for my cousin out over here. I wonder if she has a fertility app on HER phone?
The prettiest little liar there ever could be.
Heads up, BFFs!
It's open season on liars and I'm hunting! - A