And the part that really infuriated me is that 3 of my friends liked that comment to me.

I mean I understand what he was saying because yes I have an amazing beautiful little boy but this sadness took over my soul long before he was even born and not even him can take away the pain of what she's doing to me. I don't know how to breathe without her. I can't understand why people don't get it. There's some things that you just can't recover from. And if it is possible to recover, some of us are just too far gone to allow the light back in.  

Because believe you me, I have tried oh so very hard for oh so very long.

This world broke my heart and it's in the process of turning me into stone.

People will never fucking understand.

Just because you are kneeling in disaster doesn't mean that you put yourself there on purpose. Or that you know how to get out of that place if it's even possible. Because not everyone can.

That doesn't mean that I'm not a good Mother. Because I am.  

And that doesn't mean that I am suicidal. Because I am not.

So fuck you.

Post edited at 4:00 pm on May 6, 2012 by The Immortal Lie

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I Am The Soul Where Hope Lies Dying..

Trust me, I'm sure you've tried long and hard.  But you've decided to already give up.  And I know one thing is true... if you give up trying, you will NEVER improve.  If you keep at it, maybe you'll get past it with time... but if you've given up and justified this disaster that you have in your life, it will never leave you.

You also have to realize something else.  Sometimes, it's not about getting rid of your sadness and depression.  It's about learning to live with it.  If you spend your time looking for a cure, you'll end up missing the point.  Some people will live their life with depression, but you have to learn how to continue your life despite that.  It's not the easiest thing to do, but sometimes you have to change the way you view the world.  Look to make things better.  Don't look for a cure, but look for small steps in the right direction.

You may never "cure" yourself of the dilemmas you have, but you may very well make them more bearable.

Also, in the future, posting melodramatic things about how you want to kill yourself on FB is generally not well received. If you actually want to do that, you need help and should feel free to reach out for some. If you just want attention, then you also need help (but of a different sort).

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Maybe you should look into getting some emotional help. Like therapy, or medication. It's common that after you have a child and a relationship ends that depression can creep in. And because you are locked in with this kid, you start to feel trapped and alone. That's depression.  

Also, in the future, posting melodramatic things about how you want to kill yourself on FB is generally not well received. If you actually want to do that, you need help and should feel free to reach out for some. If you just want attention, then you also need help (but of a different sort).

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Can you read? I am not suicidal!

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I Am The Soul Where Hope Lies Dying..