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  LiveWire / College Forums / College Depression & Emotional Imbalance / Viewing Topic

Can't Fight This Feeling
Replies: 4 — Last Post May 23 7:01am by bluerosedangel
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( tastetherainbow )


Technician 		Reply
I dont know what to do anymore. I have been a cutter for a while but I scared myself so much that I have been trying to stop. It has been almost 6 weeks since I have cut and a month was the longest that I have ever gone. So this is a long time for me. Two nights ago I got the urge to cut again. I recently moved in for summer school with my friend and my bed is up really high. So when I felt the need to cut, I just curled up under my head and cried and shook for maybe an hour. She was finally able to help me through it but all I could think was, "what about next time?" sad to say, next time came last night. I was under my bed again but my roomy was havinga good time next door so I didnt want to bother her. I decided to go for a walk. I think I was out for almost 3 hours? Maybe 2. Thankfully, I was able to get myself through it alone.

I just know how much longer I can fight these feelings. They are killing me!

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all you need is love

9:21 am on May 16, 2008 | Joined Mar. 2008 | 30 Days Active
Join to learn more about tastetherainbow New Jersey, United States | Lesbian Female | 39 Posts | 345 Points
itachianddraco09


Lawn Care Specialist 		Reply
I have been a cutter too and i know how you feel          

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---Love is another form of Sucide---
9:45 am on May 16, 2008 | Joined May 2008 | 9 Days Active
Join to learn more about itachianddraco09 Georgia, United States | Label Free Female | 24 Posts | 114 Points
dood25


Dairy Product Addict 		Reply
It's great that you haven't cut for 6 weeks.  I'm not a cutter, so I don't know how challenging it must be, but I'm rooting for ya.
9:47 am on May 16, 2008 | Joined Dec. 2007 | 77 Days Active
Join to learn more about dood25 Alberta, Canada | Straight Male | 499 Posts | 1362 Points
swtpie


Executive 		Reply
Keep going strong. You can stop!
10:00 am on May 16, 2008 | Joined Mar. 2008 | 91 Days Active
Join to learn more about swtpie Alberta, Canada | 1963 Posts | 3121 Points
bluerosedangel


Connoisseur
Sustainer 		Reply
Quote: from dood25 at 9:47 am on May 16, 2008
It's great that you haven't cut for 6 weeks. I'm not a cutter, so I don't know how challenging it must be, but I'm rooting for ya.

I agree that I've never been a cutter, but I had many sucidal thoughts in high school, but I had  a GUN. And nothing puts more sense into your head until you have it pointing at your head. And there were so many times I had it pointing there, bc so many people didnt care. But I got tough and got thru it. So I'm glad for you, and congratulations. It's really hard. Props to you.

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Shit happens. Learn from it, get over it, & move on.
7:01 am on May 23, 2008 | Joined April 2008 | 79 Days Active
Join to learn more about bluerosedangel Iowa, United States | GLBT Ally Female | 4518 Posts | 6063 Points
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