( Anonymous )
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The sun slowly rising to meet the demands of London. A girl of privileged society has just awoken to meet the first morning glories of that of the soon to be busy streets of London. Age of 15, in the early stages of women hood, with piercing green eyes, and long blonde hair, that would make just about any man fall in love with her, if she desired.
A gentile piercing knocks on the door happen to take away any chance of her going back to sleep.
"Yes, whom is it" asked Katharine Green.
"It is I Miss Green, Charlotte,"
"Oh, please do come in" exclaimed Katharine.
"Have you had a good rest Miss?" its the beggining of the book i am writing, i have written more to it, but i am wondering of your opption?
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2:56 pm on April 28, 2008
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Dancing In The Rain
Wealthy Hobo
 Patron
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wow, that's pretty awful.
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private
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thisisrlywierd
Professional
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bad punctuation
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jrotc101
Technician
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good so far, pretty entrancing
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Alex2
Executive
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i don't like books sorry.
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2:58 pm on April 28, 2008 | Joined May 2006 | 154 Days Active
Join to learn more about Alex2 Manitoba, Canada | Straight Male | 1197 Posts | 3221 Points
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Natsy
Dairy Product Addict
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its crap. who says "whom is it?" not even posh people do that... work on your wording, the story sounds interesting. but you shouldn't have told anyone about this until may, you loon!!!
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Ask me no questions, and i'll tell you no lies
Failing honestly since 1992
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2:58 pm on April 28, 2008 | Joined Oct. 2007 | 115 Days Active
Join to learn more about Natsy England, United Kingdom | Straight Female | 1254 Posts | 2476 Points
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im with stupid
Connoisseur
Patron
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It sounds pretty good so far.
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Alright. It's Saturday night. I have no date.
A 2 liter bottle of Shasta, and my all Rush mixtape.
Let's rock!!
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The Nowhere Man
Dairy Product Addict
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Grammar needs work, "whom is it" sounds posh but is grammatically correct. Maybe you should run your character through a Mary-Sue test first to avoid any later embarrassment?
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