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How do you learn to trust people again? |
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 Replies: 12 — Last Post Sep. 19, 2006 10:48pm by Stupid lad
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dirty paws
Soothsayer
 Ad Free
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its hard for me to trust people cause i always think "just when they have my trust somethings going to happen" and i'll lose everything and wish i never trusted them
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~* Despite our differences *~
**i like boyes!**
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rememberthetimewhen
Connoisseur
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i felt the same way for a while, it took time but i found one friend who i felt i could talk to, it turns out at the time she needed me just as much as i needed her, now she is my best friend, and i would do anything for her, and i know she would do the same, just take your time and don't let your guard down until you absolutely know you can. finding that one friend opens so many other doors, because they are your base, they provide you with the security to go and find other friends, but you know that no matter what they will be there
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reach for the stars but keep your feet on the ground
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luv2talk
Quality Control Engineer
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That is somehting that happends over time. I have been hurt a lot and it has taken me a while to trust those that are close to me and it does get easier. Just give it sometime
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The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk
or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?
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( VirtusInternus )
Omnipotent One
 Patron
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I miss having close friends again so much and you guys are right about having 'walls up' or 'defences' that prevent me from getting hurt. I really want to be close to people again and find some cool people (not heaps) to hang out with again. I miss just talking shit and joking around.
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I can reach the gold if I don't self-destruct.
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crazychris
Dairy Product Addict
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I used to have so many friends, but then I moved away and over time I lost contact with most of them. I still haven't made close friends with anyone in like three years. I just don't have the energy it seems. I can make acquaintances easily, but when it comes to people who I call and hang out with at least weekly, even that doesn't happen. I too miss the constant companionship of close friends, people I can call every day and hang out with at least once a week. I still have a few friends from that long time ago before I moved, but I don't see them because we live so far away. I think the problem is that in high school, it was easier to make friends because you saw people daily. In college, you don't see the same people all the time, so in order to build a friendship, you have to hang out with them more often out of class. I have trouble trusting people too though, and I just remembered that's what this topic was about. lol.. I got carried away, my bad.
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CrAZY CHrIS"All the freaky people make the beauty of the world"
-Michael Franti
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BHalseyfan
Dairy Product Addict
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Once you've lost the trust of someone, it's really hard to learn how to trust again. I think that in time, you'll slowly quiet the small little voice in your head warning you about certain people. You just have to trust yourself to learn about a person fully, before letting them know you completly. Sorry if i'm no help.
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Derrick C can drift his way into my heart anyday.
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SuBmIsSiVeReALiTy
Quality Control Engineer
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I'm the same way...I always seem to think that people are out to hurt me in some way. There's really nothing you can do about it. You either have to be careful of who you let it which could be a bad think or you can try to change the way you think. I have made the mistake of worrying so much that I tend to push people away. I feel the need to know that their not going to hurt me so I tend to ask people constantly not to hurt me...that sometimes work...but most people don't find me worth the time to make me feel like someone to them. It's hard but if I were you, I would open my heart but be careful...you'll eventually find people that appreciate the person you are!
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sarahphil
Grasshopper
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well...i have the same issue. But I think the beauty of reaching out to people is also the thing that causes the most pain. By reaching out and sharing a part of you with them, you give them the power and knowledge to hurt you. But when you reach out...I think you relive some of the pressurs of life..
So my advice is just to be cautious, and slowly let people in. I have the tendency to close off so i hav to force myself to reach out. Don't get me wrong..I still protect myself...but eventually you have to take that chance...I've taken it and now find myself very happy and secure..but still wary 
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~it's better to be hated for you are than loved for who you're not~
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memories are forever
Lawn Care Specialist
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I have the same problem. It is VERY hard for me to trust anyone expecially my family and friends. But i've decided to try to give them all a second change since everyone makes mistakes. Its been a really hard concept for me to accept, because im scared of getting hurt again. Something i've noticed that has helped me start trusting people again, is just trying to look past whats happend before and let them slowly back into my life. I dont know if ill ever be able to trust them the way i would like to, but im tired of living in the past, and im going to start giving them all a new chance.
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The worst way to miss someone is when there standing right beside you
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But nobody can prove himself trustworthy unless we give them a chance (!!), and its also hurtful and unfair to someone to treat him like he's untrustworthy when he has so far done nothing to breach your trust. 
