My orientation was pretty awesome. I met one of my best friends there on my first day. I was walking around with a friend from high school and telling random jokes and I kept hearing someone walking behind us laughing. Since the only real criteria to be friends with me is to find things I say to be funny, an instant bond was forged.
So, what I'm saying is, stories about my life are interesting. But also, look at orientation as an opportunity to mingle with folks and learn about your upcoming college adventure.
Don't worry much about placement tests. The worst thing that could happen is that you do too well and get jammed into a class that is too challenging to handle. Just do what you can and you'll be matched up with courses on your level and everything will be A-OK.
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"My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"