And I've heard it all already. If I get sick, why does it matter?
I don't know. It just really bothers me. Everyone gets sick, I know that. But I don't want to.

Thinking all this is MAKING me sick. I'm just hurting myself.
But I can't STOP. If it's not one thing, it's another, and it never ends.
Even when I don't feel sick, I csn only think about things that MAKE me feel sick.
So I can't sleep, either. Too much on my mind keeping me awake.

Then there's the second part, the depression.
After all this, I feel so sad, all the time. Every single day.
Yes, I AM happy sometimes. Only the longest it's lasted is about half a day.
I'm sad BECAUSE of all this. All this wasted time.
I've left my house this Summer a number of three, maybe four times.
Yes, it's my fault. Thing is, I really can't help it.
Everytime I try, it blows up in my face.
Do I give up? No. I'm sure not eager to try again though.

Schools almost coming up. I don't know how I'm going to get through that.
Summer should be a happy time, but I just want to fast forward through every day. I wish I could just speed up time until I'm better, and I can live my life again.

I wish there was an easy way out, but there isn't.
I'm would NEVER hurt myself. Ever.
I'm willing to do what's needed to get better, but I just wish it wouldn't take so long.
I'm really tired of being like this. Just breaking down at random times.