I get over there and my fucking other neighbor comes out of her house piss ass drunk yelling. I think she's yelling at me so I duck behind the garbage can. Turns out her friend and her were arguing about something along the lines of "but if New Orleans was underwater..." That's all I understood. Why they had this confrontation in the middle of my street I will not know.

Anyways back to the can. I get to it and open the lid. It's pretty dark out so I used my phone as a light.

There was a fucking baby in the garbage can!! Actually that's what I first thought but then it came to my attention that it was nothing more than a grungy Cabbage Patch Doll. Damn, I thought I had something.

I was trying to be as stealthy as possible coming back, so I tried to hurdle my fence in my front yard. That failed and a scraped the shit out of my leg.

It took longer to write this than it did to go over there.

I did it for teh lulz.

Real talk.

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Smooth Talking Pimp
Child Porn
I want to be
the very best