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( Anonymous )
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God, I'm in the worst mood ever. Here recently, my girlfriend (whom I love beyond belief) has started to become what I believe to be anorexic. She's 5'7" and weighs 117. She thinks she's fat, and told me she wants to weight 109. Then I found out she was lying to me, and really wants to weigh 102. At first I didn't think much of it, and I think that's what caused everything. Now, everyday, she becomes more and more self aware, and starts to hate herself even more. I try and try to help her, but she just won't listen. I fear for her, and the fact that she'll do something stupid/hurtful, and it'll sort of be my fault for not being there when I should have. The other day she accidentally let it slip that she wanted to go throw up (she didn't think anyone was within earshot, 'cause I was going to scare her by sneaking up and saying boo and grabbing her). She said that after she ate a sandwich, which was also the only thing she had ate that day. I really, really don't know what to do anymore, 'cause she's making me feel more guilty, and I already have very low self esteem as it is. I hate myself. completely. Now, I believe she's starting to push me away, 'cause I'm trying to help her so much. I can't tell anyone (adult), b/c she'll hate me for it and will refuse to say anything or do anything, and her mom won't force her to eat. The other day she was nearly in tears b/c what she had said about throwing up made me feel bad, and she started to think that she shouldn't be with me. If it weren't for her, I'd've ended my life a long time ago. idk what I'd do if I lost her over this, or if she hurt herself when I know I could've prevented it. Please, please help. somebody. I just.... god... ***this is jasonzlpa*** Post edited at 9:49 pm on July 18, 2008 by Anonymous
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