Some people can barely manage working full time and going to school part time. Why would you be able to do all of this while providing for a baby? Is having a boyfriend who makes a little money really the answer to all your problems? Is that not just wishful thinking?

Don't bother responding, I'm not personally interested. Just some food for thought.

Post edited at 1:01 am on Nov. 18, 2008 by sykexl

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so first question i'd ask is will you stay at school?
i strongly strongly advise you stay at school, and so does your boyfriend, because if you don't you will regret it, as it will just get harder later on. some people think it will be easier to just go back later but they hardly ever end up going back.
of course when you reach around 8 months you'd have a month or two off school, but the school could just send you work home, and you could ask friends for help and such.
after you have the baby you should go back to school and catch up with anything and everything, while someone looks after the baby (already said you had a babysitter?) so that will take care of that, and of course when you both finish school you should go to college/university (not sure what you do over there).

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My boyfriend is 19 turning 20, before the baby is even due. He has health benifits(which covers the child), makes 13/hr, and is will be taking college classes online soon, and getting into his career.

His great-aunt will, she babysits his baby cousins, and she lives near us.

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next is the budget, i'm not sure if you get a baby-bonus over there? i know over here it's about $4000. if you do you should keep that money in an account and only use it for baby needs, like clothes food bed pram etc.
if you don't get a baby-bonus then that makes things harder, for the first 8 months it's usually advised that the mother spend as much time with the baby as possible so i probably suggest your boyfriend getting a part time job just to cover expenses like food and such.

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Well he works full time, I work full time, I even make money from my father still for child support.

I probably will work part-time instead then.

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diet for whom? the baby or yourself? before or after birth?

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there are a lot of things to worry about, and in saying that you really shouldn't worry too much, just take the necessary precautions.

and don't say you've disappointed people, it's not your fault you're pregnant, and they will only be shocked, but they will accept it and you will just become a stronger person by going through this.

and i'm only assuming a lot of your personal circumstances, sorry if i got any wrong.

hope i helped :)

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Thank you. You actually made me feel a lot better.

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Gamer Tag: BLANK1TA

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What makes you think you will be able to manage?

Some people can barely manage working full time and going to school part time.  Why would you be able to do all of this while providing for a baby? Is having a boyfriend who makes a little money really the answer to all your problems? Is that not just wishful thinking?

Don't bother responding, I'm not personally interested. Just some food for thought.

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Some people do. Yet i went to school, worked, and lived on my own for nearly half this year. I have done so just fine, and actually I am living a whole lot more comfotable then most 19 year olds can.

I know I am capable of anything I want. It's not wishful thinking haha, it is fact.

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Gamer Tag: BLANK1TA

at first i'd say don't work, let him provide for a while and just focus on connecting with the baby (as that is a really important thing in the first 3 months) and then if things do get a little tough, get a part time job working like 3 days a week you know.

diet is easy, i know it seems daunting having to eat for yourself and a little baby growing inside you, but really, you can find thousands of websites and books telling you what to eat and what not to eat.
for the first few months it doesn't really matter what you eat but avoid by ALL costs alcohol drugs and smoking.

i can give you a list of things you should really stick to and things you should avoid if you would like me to?
(:

glad i could help

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Well, the best of luck then. I see you live in Colorado. CCD isn't a bad school at all if you live in the Denver area, as far as community colleges go anyways. As you may know, it also shares its campus with metro and CU so it is fairly easy to transfer over if those have the programs you are interested in.

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Oh thank god you just said that, it really took some stress off my shoulders about Community College.

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Gamer Tag: BLANK1TA

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that's really good about you and your boyfriends schooling/careers, that's always a positive sign that you will have a good life and provide really well for your child.

at first i'd say don't work, let him provide for a while and just focus on connecting with the baby (as that is a really important thing in the first 3 months) and then if things do get a little tough, get a part time job working like 3 days a week you know.

diet is easy, i know it seems daunting having to eat for yourself and a little baby growing inside you, but really, you can find thousands of websites and books telling you what to eat and what not to eat.
for the first few months it doesn't really matter what you eat but avoid by ALL costs alcohol drugs and smoking.

i can give you a list of things you should really stick to and things you should avoid if you would like me to?
(:

glad i could help

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Yeah thanks. It may be hard for people to understand, but I already live on my own. We are already out of high school, and not wasting anytime working on our Careers. We have our own apartment, which is fairly nice, and cheap, and hboth have really nice and stable jobs.

I am not nearly worried about the financial shit, as I will save every penny and dime, like it was my last,  I am just worried about how to do it, and if I am gonna be doing it the... well right way I guess you would say?

Thanks Thanks Thanks.

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Gamer Tag: BLANK1TA

i'm sure you'll do fine, you sound really financially stable and it seems as if you're really in control of your life.

don't get yourself stressed out too much or upset, you're in control of everything and you make the decisions.

like i said, feel free to pm me anytime.

good luck!

You are going to bashed and called names because that's what small minded people do and unfortunately there seems to be a lot of people like that here. But i tell you what, you need to learn to ignore them and think of yourself and the baby because from now on that is all that matters. You may not feel like you want the baby right now but i promise you as soon as you see him/her for the very first time you'll love them instantly, when you first hold him/her you will never want to let go. Your life will suddenly become that child and you'll forget about the pissy little pre-teens on this site slagging you off because in that moment you'll know that you're going to be a great mother to that child.  

I sincerely wish you the best of luck.

Post edited at 3:51 am on Nov. 18, 2008 by carbonara

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Week in and week out,
Your lucky charms will always let you down,
Maybe next week we'll see,
Maybe

It's hard. It's scary. I have NO clue what I am getting myself into, but I can be a good mother. I can put my entire being into a baby, and hell she/he will possibly save me, rather then destroy me. Give me a reason now to still get everything I wanted done. Give me a reason to prove I am NOT just another statistic.

Mostly, give me a reason to give that kid... whatever the hell it wants and what I couldn't/didn't have growing up. I know I can do that. Now I just have to unjumble my thoughts so I can figure out how to get from point A.... to point B, with the kid.

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Gamer Tag: BLANK1TA

Everyone has a life plan, and everyone wants their life to go a certain way, but there are no guarantees. Things happen, circumstances change and (i don't like calling any child a mistake) blessings happen. You are right, this child could possibly change your life for the better, it may give you an incentive to change the things that are bad and make them good. You now have an even better reason to improve your life, not for yourself, but for your baby.

I can honestly say and i don't even know you, that you are going to be a fantastic parent.

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Week in and week out,
Your lucky charms will always let you down,
Maybe next week we'll see,
Maybe

As for being worried about what people think of you, DONT, Anyone who loves you will possibly be a little supprised but appart from that they will probably try and help you with anything u need help with (Althought it sounds like u wont need much help) Just remember that having a baby wont "ruin" your life unless you allow it to do so, It can be a great thing for you and can make you feel extremely happy to see and be with your son or daughter, Do what you can and enjoy life, I hope this helps...

If I understand correctly, you plan to live off of one salary, which is $13/hr. Now, I'm not amazing with math skills but how does a budget like that cover rent, bills, food, tuition, essentials of daily living + a newborn baby?

I'm not trying to sound like an asshole, because I like you, and it just really sucks that you have to deal with this but you have to think logically.

How do you plan on going to community college + whatever other college being pregnant and/or with a newborn baby? You'll have to factor in babysitters/daycare as well. Sure you might have relatives of some sort that can watch but between you going to school and your boyfriend working that baby will be with those people ALL the time. That's not necessarily something that people want to take on themselves when they have their own life to deal with.

I'm just worried about you, and the baby.

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"A wise girl kisses but doesn't love,
listens but doesn't believe,
and leaves before she is left"
-Marilyn Monroe

If you don't think that you can't abort, you need to consider adoption, or keeping the child. You could consider an open adoption, which means that you can get picture and updates on the child. You will be able to meet with and choose the parents. They should also pay for the medical bills etc.

Post edited at 9:15 am on Nov. 18, 2008 by Chiefette

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If you come across a car accident after midnight, and everyone is sober;
Keep looking, you are missing someone.

-Rules of EMS