Who knows. Perhaps in that moment something takes over and all they can think of is getting what they need and being done with it. I was raped, quite violently, a while back and I know the person who did it. I have absolutely no idea what made him do it or what the fuck he was thinking. Was it an impulse action? When he asked to walk me home had he already planned what he was going to do? I honestly don't know, but all that makes any sense to me is that it isn't logical and the agression and whatnot comes from needing to do it. I really don't know though. I don't think anyone could understand, to be honest, and I personally hate to speculate.
I hope doing what your counselor has suggested helps somewhat.
Edit: Although, perhaps it's also important to note that you might never understand why he did it or what was going through his head at the time. I hate that so many questions come as a result of something like this... so many questions with so few answers.
Post edited at 9:05 am on Dec. 4, 2008 by amiee
-------
i think you're the same as me, we see things they'll never see