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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Short Stories & Poetry / Viewing Topic

TOUCHED
Replies: 9Last Post Dec. 23, 2008 8:52pm by noireangel
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( RedNoir )


Enlightened One

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Criticism is welcome.    

when you waved at me,  I waved to you
when you smiled at me, I smiled back.
when you made a stupid joke, I laughed.
when you read a book, I wanted to know more, more about it,
more about you, and what you liked.
when you hugged me(and it wasn't innocent), I giggled and I LET YOU.
when I would've pushed anyone else away, I LET YOU.HUG.ME.THAT.WAY.
I didn't squirm. I blushed.
And later on I LET YOU.
I LET YOU TOUCH ME.
when you said those words, i was speechless.
something I dreamed of was right there in my grasp.
when my eyes widened, you closed in.
when we touched for the first time, you pulled us together
and the rest is a blur.
but i liked it.
and I let you take me to a place I haven't been in a while.
and I ENJOYED IT.
this time was different.
all the way home i reveled in the memory of it.
If I closed my eyes I could still feel your hands on my skin;
I had this wierd smirk on my face and these strange moments wondering if others could see.
Could they see? They thoughts reeling in my head of the events that had occured just two hours prior?
I think one lady could. She wouldn't stop staring. SHE KNEW.
when I got home i sat out on the patio and ate.
I wished I was still there.
the next day I CALLED.
you didn't WANT to talk.
two days later I SAW YOU
you couldn't lay an eye on ME.
when i said those words, your tongue was sharp
when my eyes widened, you walked away
no matter how hard i tried, i couldn't catch up
when i finally did,  i held back the tears.
when we touched for the last time, you pulled away so fast
my heart stopped. i couldn't breathe.
my spine was on fire. every nerve was jolted
if i closed my eyes, i could still feel your hand bat mine away.
I WAS IN SHOCK.
I LET YOU PUSH ME THAT WAY.
and just then I LET YOU.
I LET YOU TOUCH ME.

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Don't let your mouth write a check that your azz can't cash!!!
I 3 MTO
Naija gurl here! Trying to learn about the nigerian side of me
9ja movies are hilarious!


8:40 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Aug. 2006 | Days Active: 530
Join to learn more about RedNoir California, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 5,134 | Points: 15,655
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Mediocre


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I thought this would be a song about child abuse.

Disappointing.

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Incest and bestiality are neat.


8:41 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Nov. 2007 | Days Active: 209
Join to learn more about Mediocre Czech Republic | Male | Posts: 1,642 | Points: 3,195
Xgrifgrif94X


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i lie it...

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~You Just Phailed~

8:41 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Dec. 2008 | Days Active: 88
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WickedWiccan


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I think it's beautiful.

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Merry Meet, Merry Part And Merry Meet Again.

8:42 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Dec. 2008 | Days Active: 168
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Enlightened One

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Quote: from Mediocre at 8:41 pm on Dec. 23, 2008

I thought this would be a song about child abuse.

Disappointing.


I knew I should've changed the title. Why does everyone think that!!!  

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Don't let your mouth write a check that your azz can't cash!!!
I 3 MTO
Naija gurl here! Trying to learn about the nigerian side of me
9ja movies are hilarious!


8:42 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Aug. 2006 | Days Active: 530
Join to learn more about RedNoir California, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 5,134 | Points: 15,655
bacardi950


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after i read it all, i realised i liked it, it's good.

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"Since dying came into fashion life just hasn't been safe!"

8:43 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Aug. 2002 | Days Active: 78
Join to learn more about bacardi950 England, United Kingdom | Bisexual Female | Posts: 692 | Points: 1,540
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Enlightened One

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Quote: from WickedWiccan at 8:42 pm on Dec. 23, 2008

I think it's beautiful.

Oh wow... thanks!

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Don't let your mouth write a check that your azz can't cash!!!
I 3 MTO
Naija gurl here! Trying to learn about the nigerian side of me
9ja movies are hilarious!


8:43 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Aug. 2006 | Days Active: 530
Join to learn more about RedNoir California, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 5,134 | Points: 15,655
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Enlightened One

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Quote: from bacardi950 at 8:43 pm on Dec. 23, 2008

after i read it all, i realised i liked it, it's good.

    YAAAY!!! It's not to mushy is it?

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Don't let your mouth write a check that your azz can't cash!!!
I 3 MTO
Naija gurl here! Trying to learn about the nigerian side of me
9ja movies are hilarious!


8:44 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: Aug. 2006 | Days Active: 530
Join to learn more about RedNoir California, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 5,134 | Points: 15,655
SpRiNgS


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ltitle mushy but what do iknow

i get what it's about thoough so it's good

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pressure becomes real only the moment we acknowledge that it can affect us


8:48 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: July 2005 | Days Active: 1,293
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noireangel


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Many Kudos to you  

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I love it when u hate me

8:52 pm on Dec. 23, 2008 | Joined: July 2007 | Days Active: 45
Join to learn more about noireangel New Jersey, United States | Bisexual Female | Posts: 878 | Points: 1,348
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