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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Teen Eating Disorders / Viewing Topic

my girlfriend and anorexia
Replies: 18Last Post Jan. 11 12:32am by shadowcry
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( Anonymous )

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Okay my girlfriend suffered from anorexia when she was really young (from 11 until 14, she's 17 now), she's fine now, but that EXTREMELY negative self image. She eats normally(probably more than she should, due to her parents making sure she's not sick again), is a healthy weight (albeit still thin, she just has a nice ass and tits, and doesn't look emaciated). I really love her, and it kills me to see her look in the mirror in complete horror. It's so sad. She's popular, has lots of friends, is extremely extremely beautiful, and she has me (and I'm not so bad). She hears all good things about herself, all the time, yet she just shoves them off as if it's nothing. It's not like she's all "I'm so fat" but whenever I see her look in the mirror she just looks terrified, but she'll look away and be happy again. She things clothes that don't fit (like too big) fit her, she's always touching her stomach during sex, like kind of covering it, she pinches at her 'fat' subconsciously, and it really truly breaks my heart. I've been with this girl for nearly three years (through her looking emaciated, to absolutely stunning. Though, I've known her since kindergarten, by the way). I definitely don't want to break up with her, never ever could I break up with her for no reason, she or I would have to do something TERRIBLE, but I just can't see those things. I just don't understand why she doesn't see the beautiful girl everybody else sees. I tell her how beautiful I think she is all the time, and she smiles, but I know she doesn't believe it. I don't know...I just want to know what I can do to try and ignore those things because as corny and pussyish as it sounds, it really hurts my feelings lol...

10:16 pm on Jan. 10, 2009
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deadsilence


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too long

10:17 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Jan. 2008 | Days Active: 153
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puppie11


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well u should tell her how u feel or have u already? then tell her u cant watch her do this and if she keeps doing u will break up with her.

10:18 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Mar. 2008 | Days Active: 90
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cherryD


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 I guess if I were you, except she's my friend and not girlfriend, it would be painful looking at her being sad over nothing. but it's hard for you to do anything about it, because she's not going to believe what you say. She might think you are saying it because you want her to feel better. Unless it's the president of the united states or whatever, I doubt anyone can erase her opinions of herself.

-------
"You are all muggers. You have no life experience." =0
I live in a state of poverty so you should all donate for me.

10:19 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Oct. 2007 | Days Active: 471
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Miss Vanity


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You can't really do anything but try to convince her

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Click here to see 12 year old Brenna.

10:19 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Nov. 2008 | Days Active: 82
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marilyns baby


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Next time she does that grab her hand and tell her you think she's beautiful the way she is and look into her eyes when you say it and jsut hold her hand.

And if you can say i love you

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You were from a perfect world.
A world that threw me away, today...


10:19 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: June 2006 | Days Active: 208
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LudovicoTechnique


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Be happy that has recovered from her disorder. It sounds like she is making progress and taking steps in the right direction.

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salvation à la mode and a cup of tea.

10:19 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Oct. 2007 | Days Active: 383
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Cunning Stunt


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My gf is the same way. When we're going to sleep I can see the covers moving around because she's pulling at the fat on her. She's super super pretty, I have a pic of her in my IB. Nobody has ever told her she's not good looking or fat or w/e she's just always feeling like she's gaining weight or shit like that. I asked her who she's trying to impress and she has no answer. It's really hard sitting around not being able to do a thing about it.

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And when you're up watching cartoons at like 3 in the
morning you're nice and low to the ground
with your bean bag chair so when you
roll over you can sleep on the floor naked with your bag of cheetos

10:20 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Dec. 2005 | Days Active: 814
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LtrOusRtD


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Unless you can ignore it's never gonna go away, my friend has alot of the same problem as your girlfriend except she doesn't wear loose clothing, and there is nothing wrong with the clothing she has it's then her wearing stuff that is too tight... trying to stay on topic..

She needs to change, and unless you can ignore it's not gonna help or anything


10:20 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: April 2008 | Days Active: 93
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Cunning Stunt


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Quote: from Miss Vanity at 1:19 am on Jan. 11, 2009

You can't really do anything but try to convince her

That never works.

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And when you're up watching cartoons at like 3 in the
morning you're nice and low to the ground
with your bean bag chair so when you
roll over you can sleep on the floor naked with your bag of cheetos


10:20 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Dec. 2005 | Days Active: 814
Join to learn more about Cunning Stunt Massachusetts, United States | Straight Male | Posts: 22,245 | Points: 32,299
AcidSilence


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Its a hard position.
Maybe you could get to her without her really knowing..
say,
"from now on, when somebody gives you a compliment, just say "thanks", for me, okay?"

she will start to believe it in the back of her mind.
it may take a long time.
But yeah...
It will help a little bit.

-------
:D 3


10:20 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Nov. 2007 | Days Active: 273
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Bearsy

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You're not helping by telling her she's beautiful all the time. That just reassures her that her looks are the most important thing and that she'd lose you if she became less attractive.

Even if it's true (which it probably is, can't really blame you since you're a young guy) telling her how beautiful she is all the time reminds her of that and makes her think it's all that matters to you.

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click and please click
^use head phones


10:23 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: July 2008 | Days Active: 436
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thebOsssx3


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She has a psychological problem. Even though it hurts you, you really can't help her. No matter how many times you tell her she's beautiful, she'll always feel the same way about herself. You only have two options. Accept her problem, or move on.

10:23 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Feb. 2008 | Days Active: 172
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( Anonymous )

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Quote: from deadsilence at 10:17 pm on Jan. 10, 2009

too long

Shut the fuck up then and don't post you stupid inbred fuck.


10:23 pm on Jan. 10, 2009
Lally


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Well, that was anorexia does, besides starving herself. It's a mental disorder thats difficult to overcome, but not impossible. She just needs to boost her confidence, if she can't, just tell her, "fake it til she makes it". if you fake confidence, you most likely will FEEL confident.

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♥ Lally
♥ Antigen is my official LW Husband ♥

10:25 pm on Jan. 10, 2009 | Joined: Dec. 2007 | Days Active: 346
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