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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Short Stories & Poetry / Viewing Topic

my poem ...
Replies: 5Last Post Jan. 9 12:01am by CuntFace
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( xoximperfection )


Dairy Product Addict
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Please comment, and be honest, i don't mind criticism.

when i close my eyes storm clouds swirl
a roar of thunder rumbles from my gut
and my heart feels as if lightning struck
how do i escape this world
escape the pain that everyday brings
the pain i have brought on myself by choices ive made
there is no way out i see but i can be numb
free myself for a day or two
let myself crash and burn once again
knowing i may not have the strength to stop myself
knowing that nobody will catch me when i fall
nobody to hold me tight whisper in my ear
"everything will be alright, my dear"
nobody to love me for who i am
to help me take the right path
so that i can make the choices of who i am
and who i can, with time, be

-------
life . . . . . . . . . sucks.


11:50 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 | Joined: Sep. 2007 | Days Active: 123
Join to learn more about xoximperfection British Columbia, Canada | Straight Female | Posts: 426 | Points: 1,919
Jman19


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Pretty good.. would be better if you used punctuation and proper grammar.

-------
Daisy chains, Christmas plays, winter nights and summer days
Fireworks and starry skies, sunset and moonrise.
So much more to see and do, and hopefully it's all with you. ♥
seemenow1990 is worth her weight in gold.

11:55 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 | Joined: Oct. 2008 | Days Active: 115
Join to learn more about Jman19 Seychelles | Male | Posts: 4,311 | Points: 5,884
Elisee


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Its really good!
I likee it

11:55 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 | Joined: Jan. 2009 | Days Active: 60
Join to learn more about Elisee United States | Posts: 19 | Points: 622
( xoximperfection )


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Quote: from Jman19 at 11:55 pm on Jan. 8, 2009

Pretty good.. would be better if you used punctuation and proper grammar.

mehh, too tired right now    

-------
life . . . . . . . . . sucks.


11:56 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 | Joined: Sep. 2007 | Days Active: 123
Join to learn more about xoximperfection British Columbia, Canada | Straight Female | Posts: 426 | Points: 1,919
Jman19


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Quote: from xoximperfection at 8:56 pm on Jan. 9, 2009

Quote: from Jman19 at 11:55 pm on Jan. 8, 2009

Pretty good.. would be better if you used punctuation and proper grammar.

mehh, too tired right now


lol. Fair enough.

-------
Daisy chains, Christmas plays, winter nights and summer days
Fireworks and starry skies, sunset and moonrise.
So much more to see and do, and hopefully it's all with you. ♥
seemenow1990 is worth her weight in gold.


11:57 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 | Joined: Oct. 2008 | Days Active: 115
Join to learn more about Jman19 Seychelles | Male | Posts: 4,311 | Points: 5,884
CuntFace

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emo but i guess thats what you were shooting for, so yea its good

-------
Im not an artist im a f*cking work of art

12:01 am on Jan. 9, 2009 | Joined: Aug. 2008 | Days Active: 68
Join to learn more about CuntFace Idaho, United States | GLBT Ally Male | Posts: 2,525 | Points: 1,915
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