He wants me to stop self-medicating altogether, and he said that before he can start me on the new meds, I MUST pass a drug test. Once I'm on the meds, I can't be using drugs (alcohol is a drug as well) at all. I mean...I COULD, but it would fuck up the results of the meds and I wouldn't be getting any better. I WANT to get better -- my anxiety problems are so severe that all areas of my life are affected, and I'm sick of having anxiety/panic attacks.

I have been using drugs to relax, to help with my anxiety. However, that's obviously not the right thing to do, since overall smoking weed and drinking haven't helped my anxiety. Temporarily, yes -- but over time, they make it much, much worse.

Anyway, I'm doing all right. I can live my life without drugs and alcohol; I enjoy focusing on sober activities like reading, writing, learning to crochet, etc.

However, I'm a college student and I feel EXTREMELY left out. Yes, I still have a few friends that I can hang out with and do sober activites (watch TV or movies, eat with, etc.) but for the most part I'm extremely lonely. I don't go to parties anymore because I can't stand going to drunken college parties when I'm sober. I get so fucking irritated and pissed off at all of the drunken fools that I realized I have more fun just sitting at my apartment by myself than being surrounded by annoying idiots. I can't go with my boyfriend to parties either, so he's off a lot drinking with his friends and whatnot.

I now realize that I used drugs a LOT to create fun for myself. Before, I could hang out with a group of friends and get extremely baked, and it would be great fun. I would get high before work, before school, before hanging out with anyone, including my family. At parties, I would get trashed. Every aspect of my life was "enhanced" with drugs or alcohol.

Now I just find myself...lonely. I feel so left out, when I'm surrounded by thousands of college students who drink and have active social lives, going to parties and bars all the time.

There are very, very few people in my small town of 25,000 or so who don't drink or do drugs. Since there is NOTHING to do in this town, pretty much everyone spends all of their free times doing drugs and drinking. It's just what we do.

I know I'm helping my GAD, focusing on school, and working on hobbies that normally I wouldn't while stoned or drunk, but it's just so hard being so alone.

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"In a world we need to share;
it's not enough to stand and stare." --Pink Floyd

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I've never been into drugs or drinking, not even through high school, and I'm 19 now, imagine how alone I am.

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Hmmm yeah. I can see how hard it might be...

It's especially going to be difficult when I transfer to school in La Crosse next year...I'll be trying to meet new people and such and what is everyone going to want to do? Drink. *sigh*

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"In a world we need to share;
it's not enough to stand and stare." --Pink Floyd

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Quote: from reev at 3:37 pm on Nov. 26, 2008

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I've never been into drugs or drinking, not even through high school, and I'm 19 now, imagine how alone I am.

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Hmmm yeah. I can see how hard it might be...  

It's especially going to be difficult when I transfer to school in La Crosse next year...I'll be trying to meet new people and such and what is everyone going to want to do? Drink. *sigh*

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You're making the right decision in the long run. I'm a long time drug user since high school, and just marked my 2 month sobriety. Although I stopped using drugs due to different reasons than you, ( decided that part of my life, while it was fun, is simply over, time to focus on success) you are making the right decision for yourself. It's gonna be hard, you're gonna be pressured by friends and yourself mostly but stick to it. Find others that have the same ambitions ( I'm still figuring it out, but I know I can do it as long as I stay sober) Good luck!

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There are people out there who don't do drugs and drink alcohol all the time. If I have found sober friends at my university, so can you.

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Unknown to you alcohol is a drug, and one that kills more than all Illicit Drug Use, direct and indirect. It's just a sad fact that people still don't understand that, just because the government decided it was legal.

http://drugwarfacts.org/cms/?q=node/30

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Quote: from Malignant Melanoma at 10:13 am on Nov. 27, 2008

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There are people out there who don't do drugs and drink alcohol all the time. If I have found sober friends at my university, so can you.

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Unknown to you alcohol is a drug, and one that kills more than all Illicit Drug Use, direct and indirect. It's just a sad fact that people still don't understand that, just because the government decided it was legal.

http://drugwarfacts.org/cms/?q=node/30

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Ok. But I included alcohol.

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Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

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Quote: from LostinTranslation00 at 12:56 pm on Nov. 27, 2008

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Quote: from Malignant Melanoma at 10:13 am on Nov. 27, 2008

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There are people out there who don't do drugs and drink alcohol all the time. If I have found sober friends at my university, so can you.

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 Unknown to you alcohol is a drug, and one that kills more than all Illicit Drug Use, direct and indirect. It's just a sad fact that people still don't understand that, just because the government decided it was legal.  

 http://drugwarfacts.org/cms/?q=node/30

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Ok. But I included alcohol.

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"There are people out there who don't do drugs and drink alcohol all the time."

Maybe I misunderstood what you were trying to say, but what I got from that was you separating "drugs" and alcohol into two different categories.