I've live in my house for 10 years, when i first moved here the first person i met was the girl who live across the pond that is behind my house. well over the years we both grew up together with a sort of love hate relationship. i wanted to fit in with everyone and she was an outcast so i would make fun of her. through out the years she has told me she liked me multiple times and i still made fun of her. Truth is i love her (and don't say that I'm to love to know what it is because the few people I've told say this is actual love because of the way i talk about her) and i have had feelings for her since i met her.
well freshman year i had finally gathered up the strength to tell her, but before i could tell her, i had my first kiss with a sophomore girl. i was really confused and started dating that girl. over the year my friendship with the girl i like improved to the point where we were like sisters (she has a brother that annoys her a lot so she says she loves me as a "sister" instead) over that year she started dating guys at my school. now, everyone thought i disapproved of them and didn't like them because it is common knowledge that they like my now ex-gf, when in fact it was bc i like her and was jealous. well over the summer my gf move out of state and we tried a LDR (there was a good chance I'd be moving to around the area she moved to so we kept it going) and it lasted about around Nov 4 when i finally had enough.
i was going to ask her to homecoming some weeks before, but issues with the LDR held me back long enough for another guy to ask her.
this is her first serious relationship. and i swore after the last two relationships (apparently i had instilled doubts in her head when i said they would last) that I'd stay stop myself from hindering another relationship. but after 10 years of keeping this secret(the only kid who goes to my school the i told is her ex who is my friend, just to shut him up [he thought i didn't like him last year bc we all knew he liked my gf]) i cant take it anymore.
do you think i should tell her and if so how, or just to wait?
(i don't want our friendship to be ruined but i cant keep this quiet anymore[people are starting to figure this out and I'd rather haver find out from me] and she did tell me when she liked me)
PS- i asked her a while ago if she still liked me that way and she said not anymore but my friend and I cant tell if that was the truth or not bc we've heard mixed stories from others
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