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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Teen Eating Disorders / Viewing Topic

Normal eating
feels weird
Replies: 8Last Post Nov. 27, 2008 2:36pm by Anonymous
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( Anonymous )

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Ok. Im pretty much in self-recovery mode. (Have tried it many times in the past and always relapse)
Anyway, Im recovering from Ednos (basically I restrict, binge, purge, compulsivley eat- so my weight fluctuates)

Anyway, So im trying to eat 1200 calories a day (and Im lazy so I dnt exercise). But it feels so weird to eat this amount of calories. Its like its too much of middle ground. Normally I eat alot more, or alot less. Never just "normal". So for lunch today I had a personal pan for about 350 cals and that was 1 1/2 hr. ago. And it feels like since I ate that much in a servings that I should either go binge and eat ALOT more food, or go throw up the 350 cals. It just feels so odd to just eat it and let it digest and then in a couple hours eat another  "normal" meal.

This is my second day. Yesterday I had about 1188 cals. And it was okay yesterday. I dont know why I feel like this today. I just want to binge. My last binge was on sunday...and I feel good about making the change yesterday and actually doing pretty good/. Ugh.

I dont know how normal people can just eat a meal and be satisfied. Just eat a burger, fries and a coke and then be satisfied, not feel guilty, not want to binge. I just dnt understand and I wish I could be like that. But I never will. I cannot just eat a meal and not feel guilty or feel like binging. I have a "All or Nothing" state of mind and I hate it.

Idk. Sorry for this post. I just had to let this out or elser I would have seriously gone to binge already.


10:55 am on Nov. 24, 2008
sadnessness


Connoisseur
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I know how you feel.

I really restrict my eating when i am around other people, or just when i am in school or have a timetable.

At the weekend, or when im  home alone, i have massive binges.
It sucks :(

-------
dont wonder why im not smiling, wonder why you are.


11:08 am on Nov. 24, 2008 | Joined: Feb. 2008 | Days Active: 135
Join to learn more about sadnessness England, United Kingdom | Straight Female | Posts: 5,116 | Points: 6,741
murphy mcbagel


Dairy Product Addict
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well if it helps, i'm recovering from a messed up self image sugar addiction and severe stomach problems. basically what feels weird becomes natural, no matter what you issue.

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life is like a garden. ect.

11:10 am on Nov. 24, 2008 | Joined: Nov. 2008 | Days Active: 166
Join to learn more about murphy mcbagel Michigan, United States | Straight Male | Posts: 1,101 | Points: 2,775
LilMissLeahLouise


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hey if u ever wanna talk PM me =)

in a similar situation :)

id be glad to help u through things.


11:11 am on Nov. 24, 2008 | Joined: Jan. 2008 | Days Active: 343
Join to learn more about LilMissLeahLouise England, United Kingdom | GLBT Ally Female | Posts: 4,018 | Points: 7,679
sunshyne847


Dairy Product Addict
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it gets a lot easier. thats exactly how I felt. Basically all or nothing. But please, keep going. It gets easier and eating more normally gets more normal and easier and it actually becomes satisfactory. And your body and brain responds to a normal amount of food also. Taking that first step is really the hardest though and it takes a while. Try for one week though and then try for 2 and it becomes easier!! I know u can do it babe! u can pm me whenever if u want

9:03 pm on Nov. 25, 2008 | Joined: Sep. 2007 | Days Active: 235
Join to learn more about sunshyne847 California, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 62 | Points: 2,426
miNx


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same here, but im still NOT ready to recover. IDK why, but I just cant help myself. =(

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"I'm not a saint, but I'm not a sinner, but everything is cool
as long as I'm getting thinner"

12:56 am on Nov. 26, 2008 | Joined: Oct. 2007 | Days Active: 190
Join to learn more about miNx Philippines | Bisexual Female | Posts: 5,336 | Points: 8,184
( Anonymous )

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PwittyBabe :D.....see...its me

2:33 pm on Nov. 27, 2008
LilMissLeahLouise


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okay haha the other girl is a liar

2:33 pm on Nov. 27, 2008 | Joined: Jan. 2008 | Days Active: 343
Join to learn more about LilMissLeahLouise England, United Kingdom | GLBT Ally Female | Posts: 4,018 | Points: 7,679
( Anonymous )

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Quote: from PwittyBbe at 2:33 pm on Nov. 27, 2008

okay haha the other girl is a liar

indeed


2:36 pm on Nov. 27, 2008
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