Stormblazer
I have a very analytical mind, and I probably understand how it affects me more than you do. For starters, I do not feel any "need" for the drugs, nor do I crave them or anything else. If I didn't remind myself every morning I'd forget to take them, and sometimes I forget anyways.
I don't notice the difference right away either - in fact, it's usually other people who have to point out the difference to me. I told you, my self-regulatory ability goes out the window, and that includes my ability to pick up on when I'm acting differently than usual.
It is a common mis-conception that drug abusers take substances because of some form of craving, need or hedonistic desire for reinforcing stimulation.
In many cases abusers will take drugs even when it causes them great emotional suffering due to addictive salience, a largely subconscious process which causes the person to for whatever reason feel they need to take a substance.
Indeed a persons entire view of reality may be warped subtly and subconsciously, no matter how analytical or rational they think themselves and regardless of what reasons they give themselves as rationalization for their drug taking behavior, this process will be a factor in their behavior.
Ritalin, adderal I only had for a relatively short time. They had little or no positive effects. My current medication is a time-release variant of concerta, low dosage. If you care to explain how that particular drug affects the brain in laymen terms, feel free to do so.
Concerta is a slow release from of methylphenidate(Ritalin). It's biological effects are almost identical.
There are many misconceptions about the difference between the two drugs as little accurate information is ever dispensed about either.
Firstly, Ritalin contains two isomer form of methylphenidate, one is biologically active for around 4 hours whereas the other is active for around 8 hours, depending on a persons individual metabolism the active half life may vary several hours, thus a single dose of concert which releases both isomers over an extender period may result in 24 hour dosing, multiple doses of Ritalin spread over the course of a day may also result in this effect.
If you are taking a low dosage, then i guess the negative effects would be minimal short term, long-term is a role of the biological dice IMO though...
Often with these types there are as you say little observable conscious effect, it doesn't seem to fix the "problem" and so is considered to be inert, often new medications are suggested and sometimes it is found that one would "work".
How precise a science... Little consideration is given to psychosomatic mechanisms and general randomness of the mind and it's interaction with it's environment.
Countless studies have demonstrated that stimulant medications have no lasting positive effect on the people that use them in circumstances where placebo and other common variances are accounted for.
Some studies have shown temporary "benefit" in the way of grades test scores, followed shortly by a crash in academic ability, hook then sinker.
Stormblazer
Care to explain brain scans then? Or that the sole difference between off concerta and on it is my self-regulatory ability? I've had the good fortune to have parents who know me better than I do in many ways, and they notice changes in my behavior. I have an analytical mind, and I tend to notice when something is off barring the ADHD bit. It's a learned ability, as a result of coping with bi-polar (which I do not take medication for). I have had brain scans done, by a group with no prior knowledge of diagnosies until afterwards, that could demonstrate ADHD and it's effects, as well as other accurate behavioral information.
People can see things which aren't really there is they are expecting them and as i have already mentioned, the placebo effect and general randomness of the most complex structure known to mankind interacting the second most complex structure, the mind and the world.
Regardless of what brain scans you received, SPECT, fMRI etc...
There is no established pathology for psychiatric illnesses, they are subjectively diagnosed, that is to say it is a matter of opinion whether someone is normal or ill, a brain scan can only reveal the unique pathology of an individual, at a given time under a certain stimulus.
There is far too imprecise psychological criteria for a precise neurological pathology to be observable, the mind and the psychology of the mind is simply too complex for such a notion to find validity.
Any group of people that claimed they could identify a psychiatric illness with a brain scan would be committing a fraud and would be liable for legal action.
You seem to mention your analytical mind a lot, if i may comment on this, as stimulants tend to atrophy the right hemisphere(emotive) of the mind, thus shifting balance to the left hemisphere(analytical).
It sounds totally ridiculous to say that analytical skills can develop from coping with "bipolar". I can think of no established line of psychiatric, psychological or neurological reasoning for this, it simply sounds like a baseless self rationalization.
It's possible that any of the drugs you may have taken in "treatment" for bipolar could have caused further neurological dysfunction/toxicity which resulted in the development of a more self focused, introverted and analytical mind set.
This damaging of hemispheric connections and right hemisphere function tends to erode sense of self in the 1st person and i noticed you seem to refer to yourself in the 3rd person a lot, something to think about maybe...
It is unfortunate that the present psychiatric paradigm does not recognize "neurotoxicity from exposure to psychotropic medications" as a neurological disorder, as this is seriously an epidemic problem.
Instead it only recognizes lots of normal people or people with conditions that could be managed with other methods of treatment as being neurologically disorders, then proceeds to psychologically confuse them into accepting chemical lobotomization.
Regardless of how analytical you are, it is unlikely you will ever understand yourself or indeed be yourself until you give up the medications and focus on being happy with who you are.
Although i suspect it is probably too late...
I have no real stake in what you do, i am just disappointed in the present medical system, particularly psychiatry and how it is covertly toxicity the minds of a generation of children they were charged with the duty of keeping healthy.
The first law of medicine is "First, do no harm"
Virtually all psychiatric drugs violate that premise...
Post edited at 3:45 pm on July 20, 2009 by rstyku
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Your a junkie dude and most of your problems are probably psychosomatic, the mind is a very powerful tool and a blade that cuts both ways, it can be used the purposes of self destruction and inhibition as much as it can creation and expansion. 
