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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Living with Disabilities / Viewing Topic

Hard of Hearing/Deaf
Finding Who I Am...?
Replies: 7 — Last Post July 31 1:05pm by stonebutterfly
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( XxIceWolfxX )


Dairy Product Addict 		Reply
I am hard of hearing... I wear two BTE digital hearing aids and have been since I was five years old. I am almost twenty now.
My whole life I was taught not to let my hearing loss affect anything I wanted to be in life... and that's how I lived my life. I was never taught to sign but instead taught to lip read. I am grateful I was taught to lip read but I also wish I was taught sign language.

Being hard of hearing has never really bothered me until now. For whatever reason, I wish I had the chance to grow up with people who understood the challenges that come along with being h.o.h/deaf. I get so frustrated with myself sometimes and frustrated with the way people treat me when they see my hearing aids... and I can't help but get angry and upset.
I wish I knew sign language, I wish I understood those who grew up fully submerged in the h.o.h./deaf culture, but I will never fully understand Deaf culture because I grew up in a hearing world.

Growing up, I learned to deal with my frustration and anger and hold it inside. I don't think my parents ever really understood how hard it was for me sometimes to be in a classroom where I was always a little... 'different,' from the other kids. I don't think they understood how much I hated being around people at times or why I was so reserved.

Right now, I just wish I understood the h.o.h of myself more. When I was younger and I saw another kid with hearing aids, I got so excited and felt like I could connect with someone who could share my frustrations. It is the same with me today whenever I see someone with hearing aids... I feel like I am not so alone.

I feel like I keep repeating myself... I guess I am just hoping to find myself and I'm wondering if anyone shares the same frustrations I have.

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Beatha, Gáire, Grá

8:24 pm on July 9, 2009 | Joined: Nov. 2003 | Days Active: 402
Join to learn more about XxIceWolfxX Illinois, United States | Lesbian Female | Posts: 610 | Points: 4,877
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Maxie


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My friend has hearing aids and cochlear implants... I never noticed her hearing aid until she took it off to go swimming, almost a whole semester after we became friends.

I just don't notice it, it doesn't even make a difference to me.

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8:27 pm on July 9, 2009 | Joined: Dec. 2004 | Days Active: 442
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( XxIceWolfxX )


Dairy Product Addict 		Reply
That's what everyone says about me... they don't notice I am h.o.h. or forget that I wear hearing aids...

What just frustrates me is I get so angry sometimes about not being able to hear something or someone poking fun at me and no one seems to understand why I am upset.

This has never bothered me until now... and I am not sure why.

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Beatha, Gáire, Grá

8:37 pm on July 9, 2009 | Joined: Nov. 2003 | Days Active: 402
Join to learn more about XxIceWolfxX Illinois, United States | Lesbian Female | Posts: 610 | Points: 4,877
dreamweaver


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I know how you feel there. I've also grew up a bit hard of hearing (didn't need hearing aids though) and even though I went through speech therapy and such, I was still a bit of an outcast because of it. I never really understand why people thought so little of me until I left for college. I realized that being in an unfamiliar setting with a whole set of new people really showed that side of me. I found myself repeating myself to people (got to the point where I would frustrated as hell), people poking fun at how I said words (my speech delay is a bit obvious at times), and noticing that my hearing wasn't nearly as good as I assumed it was.

I finally just told my best friend about my past and how I grew up with it. She started to understand and even apologized about many of her comments. It really helped a lot to tell her about it, not just the fact that she finally understood my frustrations and anger, but it helped me cope with it as well.

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8:38 pm on July 9, 2009 | Joined: June 2004 | Days Active: 1,381
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quietly


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I'm deaf, I understand message me

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listen with your heart
11:20 am on July 10, 2009 | Joined: Mar. 2009 | Days Active: 57
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gitty


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What you don't here, can't hurt you, can it?


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4:12 am on July 20, 2009 | Joined: July 2009 | Days Active: 7
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bananapants


Grasshopper 		Reply
I'm hard of hearing too, but i don't quite need hearing aids. I understand how it's so annoying to have to ask someone to repeat what they're saying, or when they notice the little speech problems. Or especially when you can't understand what people are saying and they laugh when you don't follow the conversation.
I would say it's just now starting to bother you because you're getting older and starting to move away from your childhood and making your own life. Maybe you're coming to a point in life where you want to embrace the fact that you're h.o.h., and not just deny it's existence. sign up for an asl class and start learning some basic signs. message me if you need to talk.
9:16 pm on July 26, 2009 | Joined: July 2009 | Days Active: 3
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stonebutterfly


Lawn Care Specialist 		Reply
I think being hard off hear will affect my futare jo as a bartender
1:05 pm on July 31, 2009 | Joined: July 2009 | Days Active: 5
Join to learn more about stonebutterfly Vermont, United States | Bisexual Female | Posts: 32 | Points: 82
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