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You do need to be a parent to understand, this thread is a clear example since the non-parents are falling prey to stereotypical ideas of what parents need to buy/do with their money. And continue to toot those ideas even in the face of multiple parents on the thread saying to the contrary.

Housing is an issue for everyone, parent and non-parent alike. My childless friends have just as much pressing issue paying their rent or finding places to live as I do. It isn't parent-specific.

Go away. You aren't going to convince me or any parents here that babies are expensive. And as much as you want to sit there going "It doesn't matter that I don't have a kid! I know exactly what I'm talking about!" It does.

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No this topic was about why society is "mean" to teen mothers. But really society is not mean to them when you considered how much help they get and how much their responsibility is lessened.

And why does it matter if I have a kid or not? You just trying to hold this over my head because I proved many points during this discussion you just simply can't counter them.

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http://www.last.fm/user/Musicfanx3
NEW LASTFM

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Quote: from MamaMockingbird at 8:42 pm on July 7, 2009

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Quote: from peace love sunshine at 5:44 pm on July 7, 2009  
  Just because I'm not a mother doesn't mean I can't know this stuff.  
 Well, yes, it does. Unless you're the one providing for a kid, you don't really know what the cost of providing for one is  

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Thats not true at all.

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Quote: from JennyColada at 3:20 pm on July 8, 2009

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Quote: from Chava at 5:29 pm on July 7, 2009

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 8:26 pm on July 7, 2009

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Quote: from dunebug at 6:09 pm on July 7, 2009

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Quote: from peace love sunshine at 3:17 pm on July 7, 2009

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    Are you serious? Babies ARE expensive, even with just the basic neccessities. Think about how many diapers they go through, and how fast they grow. Also, the cost of raising a baby includes transportation expenses. And what if you have to work? Then you have to factor in child care. There's also doctor expenses, to make sure your baby is in good health.      
    It's more than just car seats and clothes.

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   I think at the height of our diaper use, we spent $100 maybe $150/month on diapers. Teenagers spend nearly that much on one video game ($60-$80 not including tax).      

   Growing is free. I spent maybe $100-$200/YEAR on clothes because I wasn't a vain idiot and I bought second-hand. Kids use things so shortly that most clothes are in perfect condition but I paid 50 cents for the tshirts instead of $15+.

   Transportation depends on your area. I personally walk and take the bus an unlimited monthly bus pass is $75/month.

   Medical is an issue if you're down in the States, but it's not too bad here in Canada. Dental isn't covered but most kids don't even see a Dentist here until 2-3. Hunter saw one for the first time a few months ago and I think we paid $80 for the visit which happens once a year.

   *shrug* It's all in how you choose to do it. They actually become more expensive as they get older.      
   

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  Thank you for emphasizing my point Peace love sunshine. To dunebag I ask, if it so cheap and apparently you don't need an education, I suppose a teen mother could get all the money to pay for all of these expenses by flipping burgers?

     
  This was just the point I was trying to make earlier but I guess you didn't get it.

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  Actually they can/ Oscar works at Chuck E Cheese and I work at a gas station.

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 I'm also pretty sure I recall you making topics about you getting welfare and living with your parents. Unless I'm getting confused with someone else (which is possible).

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Nope. You are getting yourself confused. I have a disability yes, and maybe you've seen those topics. I live with my parents but I work and contribute as well as paying taxes.

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 12:53 pm on July 8, 2009

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Quote: from MamaMockingbird at 8:42 pm on July 7, 2009

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Quote: from peace love sunshine at 5:44 pm on July 7, 2009
  Just because I'm not a mother doesn't mean I can't know this stuff.
  Well, yes, it does. Unless you're the one providing for a kid, you don't really know what the cost of providing for one is

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 Thats not true at all.

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Uh, yes. Yes it is.

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Not in the sense of someone who has to go to school with teen mothers and talks to them on a frequent level.

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http://www.last.fm/user/Musicfanx3
NEW LASTFM

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Not in the sense of someone who has to go to school with teen mothers and talks to them on a frequent level.

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Zomgggggggggggzzz serrrrlyzzyyy?!?!!? You actually talked to a teen mother? WOWWWWZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! You are clearly suited to give any and all manner of parenting advice! In fact, you should see if you can take over the Dr.Spock website since you clearly know sooooooooooooooozz much more about parenting than ANY of ussssss!!!

My MIL died of cancer. Since I was there, I guess that equates to me knowing exactly what it's like to have and deal with cancer. I think I'll go to the cancer ward and tell all those cancer schmoes how they should feel and deal with their cancer. Clearly, I know just as much if not more about then they do. I mean, I talked to her and I was there. And we were friends. Everyone with cancer should listen to me and me alone and take what I say quite seriously.

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Holly.
Mama to Hunter Kai
Still missing you, LML. (1941-2007). ♥
"Nothing is worth more than this day."

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 1:14 pm on July 9, 2009

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 Not in the sense of someone who has to go to school with teen mothers and talks to them on a frequent level.

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Zomgggggggggggzzz serrrrlyzzyyy?!?!!? You actually talked to a teen mother? WOWWWWZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! You are clearly suited to give any and all manner of parenting advice! In fact, you should see if you can take over the Dr.Spock website since you clearly know sooooooooooooooozz much more about parenting than ANY of ussssss!!!

My MIL died of cancer. Since I was there, I guess that equates to me knowing exactly what it's like to have and deal with cancer. I think I'll go to the cancer ward and tell all those cancer schmoes how they should feel and deal with their cancer. Clearly, I know just as much if not more about then they do. I mean, I talked to her and I was there. And we were friends. Everyone with cancer should listen to me and me alone and take what I say quite seriously.  

 

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Thats two totally different things. Cancer is so different from teen age pregnancy I don't see how anyone could ever compare the choice. You don't chose to get cancer. You do chose to become pregnant when you chose to make irresponsible choices.

And just so you know its not just the teenage mom who has to go through the pregnancy but so do her friends, family, and other people in her life. A teenager's life is not the only life affected when she has a baby.

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http://www.last.fm/user/Musicfanx3
NEW LASTFM

I'm trying to make you see how ridiculous you look claiming that you're able to give advice on a complex issue that you have no experience with, simply because your friends have experience with it. Your friends =/= you.

And yes, you can essentially choose to get cancer. Pretty much everyone knows that smoking and excessive tanning lead to cancer. If they insist on heavily smoking and/or excessive tanning, they've essentially chosen to get cancer. Or at least, accept the risk of cancer in the same way that people claim that women accept the risk of pregnancy when they engage in sex, knowing that it's a very possible outcome. Same thing, not my fault you don't understand simple comparisons.

You keep nosing into issues that have nothing to do with you. Just because YOU care how the issue might affect you doesn't give you the right to say that it does/should affect everyone the same way. If it negatively affected a family, they would deal with it.  

Aside from an ignorant whine about taxes, you've given no serious issue on how the issue even remotely affects you. Clearly it doesn't if you're befriending teen parents. Yet, you want to come on here and bitch and moan about how all social aid should be cut off and how teen parents mooch one way or another and this and that.  

This is the Teen Pregnancy & Parenting Support forum, if you're only here to be negative and insult teen parents, I'll report you for violating the forum rules.  I'm tired of arguing with you and this isn't the first thread you've pulled this negativity and obnoxiousness on in here. You aren't helping anyone and irritating the actual parents for which the forum was designed.

Post edited at 9:51 pm on July 9, 2009 by dunebug

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Holly.
Mama to Hunter Kai
Still missing you, LML. (1941-2007). ♥
"Nothing is worth more than this day."

I'm trying to make you see how ridiculous you look claiming that you're able to give advice on a complex issue that you have no experience with, simply because your friends have experience with it. Your friends =/= you.  

And yes, you can essentially choose to get cancer. Pretty much everyone knows that smoking and excessive tanning lead to cancer. If they insist on heavily smoking and/or excessive tanning, they've essentially chosen to get cancer. Or at least, accept the risk of cancer in the same way that people claim that women accept the risk of pregnancy when they engage in sex, knowing that it's a very possible outcome. Same thing, not my fault you don't understand simple comparisons.  

You keep nosing into issues that have nothing to do with you. Just because YOU care how the issue might affect you doesn't give you the right to say that it does/should affect everyone the same way. If it negatively affected a family, they would deal with it.    

Aside from an ignorant whine about taxes, you've given no serious issue on how the issue even remotely affects you. Clearly it doesn't if you're befriending teen parents. Yet, you want to come on here and bitch and moan about how all social aid should be cut off and how teen parents mooch one way or another and this and that.    

This is the Teen Pregnancy & Parenting Support forum, if you're only here to be negative and insult teen parents, I'll report you for violating the forum rules.  I'm tired of arguing with you and this isn't the first thread you've pulled this negativity and obnoxiousness on in here. You aren't helping anyone and irritating the actual parents for which the forum was designed.

I was talking about other forms of cancer such as leukemia. And I haven't done anything wrong because this topic was about why society were mean to teen mothers and I gave reasons why and also explained how a teen age pregnancy is not just about the mom but others too. I explained why and how it effects the world at large. There are negatives about everything in life and I did look at it from both sides when I talked about how the burden of teen age pregnancy is lessened. While its a benefit for the mom, it might not always be a benefit for society. Originally the question was asked what does RESPONSIBILITY have to do with and thing and I proved that too, showing how the burdens of teen pregnancy is lessened through the grandparents and taxes. In fact by lessening the burden on teen age mothers we as a society are glorifying it because now this gives teens the idea that they'll just have a baby and everything is gonna be the way it was before. But its not. Its a life altering decision and for how widespread the problem is teens just don't seem to realize this and when they do its too late to take back what has already been done. I wasn't obnoxious  in any way and in fact its you who is the one who is being that way to me with your comments. I never insulted anyone and only said things to prove my point further. None of my comments were directed at any one person and so I don't see what your trying to pull here. When I did address you or (anyone of the parents) I did so to prompt questions that would emphasis my point.

What about the other stuff that was  said on this thread such as "they should of kept they're legs shut"? Are you not offended by that? At-least I gave my explanation then just posting mean comments like that. You should report those folks not me.

Post edited at 10:47 pm on July 9, 2009 by musicfan3

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http://www.last.fm/user/Musicfanx3
NEW LASTFM

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Because they're idiots.

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Quote: from Mein Alias at 1:44 pm on June 26, 2009

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Because they're idiots.

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Because they make bad choices. Teens aren't capable of truly caring for another life. I'd be pissed to if I was a grandma and I got stuck with it.

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Thast bullshit and you know it your telling me I dont love my mother or my brother? How bout My GF what about anybody i take care of NOW. think before you speak Bitch!

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amber10lynne is mine forever.
Ill be right there every time. Im here to stay. If you need me let me know

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 11:46 am on June 26, 2009

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Quote: from Mein Alias at 1:44 pm on June 26, 2009

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Because they're idiots.

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 Because they make bad choices. Teens aren't capable of truly caring for another life. I'd be pissed to if I was a grandma and I got stuck with it.

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Thast bullshit and you know it your telling me I dont love my mother or my brother? How bout My GF what about anybody i take care of NOW. think before you speak Bitch!

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Sometimes that happens where the baby has to be cared for by the grandparents. That doesn't happen in all cases but it does happen and it can put a strain on some families when they've got an extra mouth to feed. With out the support of the grandparents its a really struggle for some people. Just because a teen might not be able to care for their child does not mean they don't love their child I never said anything like that, I just meant they might not be able to provide for them in terms of a job, financial  support and things like that from being so young.

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http://www.last.fm/user/Musicfanx3
NEW LASTFM

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Quote: from renegade riot at 2:58 am on July 10, 2009

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 11:46 am on June 26, 2009

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Quote: from Mein Alias at 1:44 pm on June 26, 2009

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Because they're idiots.

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  Because they make bad choices. Teens aren't capable of truly caring for another life. I'd be pissed to if I was a grandma and I got stuck with it.

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 Thast bullshit and you know it your telling me I dont love my mother or my brother? How bout My GF what about anybody i take care of NOW. think before you speak Bitch!

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Sometimes that happens where the baby has to be cared for by the grandparents. That doesn't happen in all cases but it does happen and it can put a strain on some families when they've got an extra mouth to feed. With out the support of the grandparents its a really struggle for some people. Just because a teen might not be able to care for their child does not mean they don't love their child I never said anything like that, I just meant they might not be able to provide for them in terms of a job, financial support and things like that from being so young.

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I've given you many examples just from my own life about how two teens can support a child even financially. Right now I am cooking spaghetti, on my stove, in my apartment, while watching my kids whom I pay for. I am married to my kids' father even though we had our first son when I was 18 (pregnant at 17) and my husband was 17. We had help for a small while 6-7 months and now we pay for EVERYTHING that we need for our kids. So yes teens are capable of taking care of/paying for their children.

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Enrique's (21 months) and Chase's (2 months) mommy www.myspace.com/Chaya77

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I was talking about other forms of cancer such as leukemia. And I haven't done anything wrong because this topic was about why society were mean to teen mothers and I gave reasons why and also explained how a teen age pregnancy is not just about the mom but others too. I explained why and how it effects the world at large. There are negatives about everything in life and I did look at it from both sides when I talked about how the burden of teen age pregnancy is lessened. While its a benefit for the mom, it might not always be a benefit for society.  Originally the question was asked what does RESPONSIBILITY have to do with and thing and I proved that too, showing how the burdens of teen pregnancy is lessened through the grandparents and taxes. In fact by lessening the burden on teen age mothers we as a society are glorifying it because now this gives teens the idea that they'll just have a baby and everything is gonna be the way it was before. But its not. Its a life altering decision and for how widespread the problem is teens just don't seem to realize this and when they do its too late to take back what has already been done.   I wasn't obnoxious in any way and in fact its you who is the one who is being that way to me with your comments. I never insulted anyone and only said things to prove my point further. None of my comments were directed at any one person and so I don't see what your trying to pull here. When I did address you or (anyone of the parents) I did so to prompt questions that would emphasis  my point.

What about the other stuff that was said on this thread such as "they should of kept they're legs shut"? Are you not offended by that? At-least I gave my explanation then just posting mean comments like that. You should report those folks not me.

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STFU. She used cancer as an example. Cancer and pregnancy are two totally diffrent thigs, there you are correct, but the example that she used to connect the two situations are EXACTLY what your doing. You just sound flat out stupid. Unless you are a teen parent, then NO you don't know everything about being one. So get the fuck out of here with that mindset.

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12/27/08 What day changed your life?

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Quote: from dunebug at 6:09 pm on July 9, 2009

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Quote: from musicfan3 at 1:14 pm on July 9, 2009

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  Not in the sense of someone who has to go to school with teen mothers and talks to them on a frequent level.

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 Zomgggggggggggzzz serrrrlyzzyyy?!?!!? You actually talked to a teen mother? WOWWWWZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! You are clearly suited to give any and all manner of parenting advice! In fact, you should see if you can take over the Dr.Spock website since you clearly know sooooooooooooooozz much more about parenting than ANY of ussssss!!!  

 My MIL died of cancer. Since I was there, I guess that equates to me knowing exactly what it's like to have and deal with cancer. I think I'll go to the cancer ward and tell all those cancer schmoes how they should feel and deal with their cancer. Clearly, I know just as much if not more about then they do. I mean, I talked to her and I was there. And we were friends. Everyone with cancer should listen to me and me alone and take what I say quite seriously.

 

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Thats two totally different things. Cancer is so different from teen age pregnancy I don't see how anyone could ever compare the choice. You don't chose to get cancer. You do chose to become pregnant when you chose to make irresponsible choices.

And just so you know its not just the teenage mom who has to go through the pregnancy but so do her friends, family, and other people in her life. A teenager's life is not the only life affected when she has a baby.

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I disagree. I support myself. My parents, friends, and family have absolutely nothing to do with me or my baby. There life is in no way affected by me having a child. You don't need to be making such strong generalizations.

So because your teen friends have a child your saying that ALL teen parents are the same. You can do all the research and watch as many programs on MTV about teen pregnancy all you want but you have not experienced it for yourself therefore you don't know anything about it.

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I love my life as a mommy and a wife.