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oral given my me to a girl and fingering is fair game. intercourse i cheating

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when you have to ask

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Lol it's not for my own information, see the OP, "I have a theory..."

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Me break the rules? No,i test their elasticity.

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all of that

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I'm curious to know at what stage someone is cheating. I have a theory...

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1. If they're lying to me about it, then even liking someone qualifies as cheating, though not nearly so severe as, say, sex. I value honesty. I don't care if you like someone else as well, I might even encourage you if I like that person too. But don't lie to me about it.

2. If you're not lying to me, but you do something reckless with another person, I consider that cheating but a far lesser form of it than anything in #1. Lying is the greatest offense, period.

#2 I can almost certainly forgive. And if the whole thing is in the open and known, there's nothing to forgive in the first place.
#1 is harder. I need to know I can trust someone to be honest with me, and that includes friends. How can I trust anyone, whether it's a salesman or my closest lover, if they can't be truthful? On the flipside, being honest earns my trust and respect, and hopefully vice-versa.

To illustrate the above:
Let's say you've got a crush on someone else, and want to get to know them better. The only way you could cause issue at this point is if you don't let me know about it or lie about it. Likewise if I did the same I would let you know. If you lie about it though, you've done damage already - any relationship should be in some part founded on honesty.
If you did something reckless at this point, such has having sex without getting to know them first, but still told me I'd be a little upset but it could be worked out. Beyond that it depends on the details of the relationship. If you weren't honest with the other person it would also make it a bigger issue.

Now, if you did something and then lied to me about it, reckless or not, you've just just done severe damage. This is the point at which I consider cheating as bad as most people do in normal circumstances, if not worse.

Ideally, all information about what's going on should be in the open. I don't have the right to control someone else in a relationship any more than they have a right to control me, but honesty is a fair expectation to have.

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Religion: Atheistic agnostic, political independent
Polyamory FAQ Relationships