Mind you, I rarely do THAT well, so you'd think I'd be happy.  And yet, I can't even be happy with that.

*Sigh*... anyone else at a point where they just can't find any reason to be proud of any marks, GPA, etc...

Or... anyone know a way to help me stop being this way?

I've learned to not care too much about it. Of course grades are important, but they aren't the most important thing in life. The key is to do the best you can, and to not overthink any of it. One little mark isn't going to change anything really, and if you do screw up on something big, it still isn't the end of the world. You just need to breathe in, breathe out, and move on.

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Take me above your light
Carry me through the night
Hold me secure in flight
Sing me to sleep tonight

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I'm the same way. Except I just never feel like I deserve the good marks I get, or the credit people give me.

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This is how I feel

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a purpose to human life, no matter who is controlling it,
is to love whoever is around to be loved
- kurt vonnegut

I wish I could suggest a way to get over it, but I'm still experiencing it myself. :/

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ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ

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I feel the same way. I also tend to have trouble accepting praise or feeling happy when I have done well. It's really frustrating, and it remains difficult for many other people to understand.

I wish I could suggest a way to get over it, but I'm still experiencing it myself. :/

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Yeah.  I've pretty much always been like this.  I definitely don't deserve the praise either.  I could put in so much more effort...

It's part of the reason I push myself to take so many classes.  I feel like if I keep pushing myself to a challenge, that I'll finally be able to appreciate what I accomplish, especially when compared to the norm.

But even that doesn't help.  Lol, I just want to be happy with myself for once...

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Get high
it works for most of my friends

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Not my thing.  I don't like the thought of not being in control of myself.  I don't drink either.

And more than anything, I have better things to spend my money on, lol.

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Quote: from JTHM at 10:41 pm on Oct. 12, 2009

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I feel the same way. I also tend to have trouble accepting praise or feeling happy when I have done well. It's really frustrating, and it remains difficult for many other people to understand.  

 I wish I could suggest a way to get over it, but I'm still experiencing it myself. :/

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Yeah. I've pretty much always been like this. I definitely don't deserve the praise either. I could put in so much more effort...

It's part of the reason I push myself to take so many classes. I feel like if I keep pushing myself to a challenge, that I'll finally be able to appreciate what I accomplish, especially when compared to the norm.

But even that doesn't help. Lol, I just want to be happy with myself for once...

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I did the same thing and ended up working myself much harder than was necessary through high school. I took the most rigorous courses and was frustrated when I wasn't struggling, and remained unhappy with my effort until the end. I began college this year and while I don't think much differently, I know that I stressed myself out unnecessarily, considering most of what I did ended up having no palpable value.

Take it a bit slower and pay attention to what your peers are doing. It sounds stupid, but it really helps put things into a reasonable perspective. As you go, instead of just jumping upon the opportunity to do the most academically challenging work you can, only strive for projects and courses you are sure that you will need. I ended my senior year with a 100.60 average, high scores on every major exam, and advanced placement in my area of interest, and so little of it mattered in the end. It isn't worth hating yourself for things that are beyond your reach, you know?

Again, it's hard for me to explain this because I still feel the same way about myself. I am a horribly lazy person in general, but I get disgusted with myself for not working as hard as I possibly can at all times. If I don't get a perfect score, I'm angry with myself until I do, even if I score the highest out of the class. It really is an odd feeling, haha.

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ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ

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Quote: from Just Waiting Here at 1:48 am on Oct. 13, 2009

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Quote: from JTHM at 10:41 pm on Oct. 12, 2009

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I feel the same way. I also tend to have trouble accepting praise or feeling happy when I have done well. It's really frustrating, and it remains difficult for many other people to understand.

  I wish I could suggest a way to get over it, but I'm still experiencing it myself. :/

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 Yeah.  I've pretty much always been like this.  I definitely don't deserve the praise either.  I could put in so much more effort...  

 It's part of the reason I push myself to take so many classes.  I feel like if I keep pushing myself to a challenge, that I'll finally be able to appreciate what I accomplish, especially when compared to the norm.  

 But even that doesn't help.  Lol, I just want to be happy with myself for once...

---

I did the same thing and ended up working myself much harder than was necessary through high school. I took the most rigorous courses and was frustrated when I wasn't struggling, and remained unhappy with my effort until the end. I began college this year and while I don't think much differently, I know that I stressed myself out unnecessarily, considering most of what I did ended up having no palpable value.

Take it a bit slower and pay attention to what your peers are doing. It sounds stupid, but it really helps put things into a reasonable perspective. As you go, instead of just jumping upon the opportunity to do the most academically challenging work you can, only strive for projects and courses you are sure that you will need. I ended my senior year with a 100.60 average, high scores on every major exam, and advanced placement in my area of interest, and so little of it mattered in the end. It isn't worth hating yourself for things that are beyond your reach, you know?

Again, it's hard for me to explain this because I still feel the same way about myself. I am a horribly lazy person in general, but I get disgusted with myself for not working as hard as I possibly can at all times. If I don't get a perfect score, I'm angry with myself until I do, even if I score the highest out of the class. It really is an odd feeling, haha.

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Haha, exactly.  I never got things perfect though or was top of the class (I went to a special school though, so all my classes were considered accelerated, and many of the students were just like me).

The thing with college is that I'd like to finish my degree early if I can, especially to save money.  But if I don't, I want to fit room in for a minor.  I don't live anywhere near campus to even get involved in social activities or really make any friends.  So really, when I make the trip up to school, the more classes I have, the more it's worth it.  I only have to go in for three hours tomorrow, and it takes me two hours to get there and another 2 hours back... it makes it frustrating to spend more time GETTING there than staying there, haha.  Most days, I have 6-8 hours of class though.

I don't know, in a sense, it makes me happy.  But I also have a scholarship riding on my GPA.  I can't afford to lose it... though I'm still waiting on something to come back to me telling me whether or not they'll qualify me for instate... which would take a huge stress off my shoulders, lol.

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If it was a 91 vs. 99 I would be pissed but dude...a 99 is essentially a 100, right?

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Pretty much.  And I know that's the case... I thought I would be happy with it, since I knew I did well.  More than anything is that I can't justify NOT getting 100%.  I finished an hour early, checked all over, and over looked a stupid mistake in the end...

I dunno, I want to be happy about it, that's the weird thing.  I know it'll get me my A, and in college based off of GPA, that's all that matters... (like a 91 vs 99 doesn't even matter if it's still an A)... but it still makes me angry for some reason -__-'.