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too self conscious for sex |
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 Replies: 13 — Last Post Oct. 24, 2008 9:53am by Anonymous
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( Anonymous )
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ok, so i met my bf on the internet like a year and a half ago. we met up in january for the first time, and it's all been great. this summer we were together for weeks at a time, and started 'having sex'... however, this sex is not all that it should be. i'm really fucking embarrassed about it all. i have no idea what i'm doing and i'm petrified of doing something wrong. i'm scared of initiating almost anything because i'm afraid i'll be shiiiiiiit at it. what can i do to get over this?? oh also: both virgins prior to this relationship (which OBVIOUSLY doesnt help because neither of us has any clue, really), and he is at uni a few hundred miles away now so we only really get to see each other once a month, ergo practicing extensively isn't really an option. any advice will be appreciated... 
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Rollo Tomasi
Soothsayer
 Patron
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just say "hey, tell me if you'd like me to do something different during sex to make it better and i will do the same" and then the problem will solve itself
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sorry about my face guys
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Rollo Tomasi
Soothsayer
Patron
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and if you can't do that much then stop having sex and work on your crippling anxiety
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sorry about my face guys
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Chiefette
Connoisseur
 Sustainer
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It doesn't sound like you are/were ready for sex. Perhaps you should wait a little longer, until you become more comfortable with him.
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I love you Mikey!
March 17th 2007
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7:33 am on Oct. 24, 2008 | Joined: Sep. 2008 | Days Active: 146
Join to learn more about Chiefette Florida, United States | Straight Female | Posts: 5,809 | Points: 7,966
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gronk
Soothsayer
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As a general rule id say sex ruins relationships longevity and fullfilment. People are so keen to ramp things up physically, before they really know the person. Its almost as if they are trying to forge a connection when there isnt really on there.
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What are your post-retirement plans?
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7:35 am on Oct. 24, 2008 | Joined: Oct. 2004 | Days Active: 712
Join to learn more about gronk Australia | Straight Male | Posts: 4,704 | Points: 12,404
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Natsy
Abracadabra!
Patron
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have a shot of vodka or something beforehand. just to loosen you up a bit lol xx
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The enticing darkness surrounds us all.
The only question is- when will you give in?
Twilight Parody - you will love it
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7:39 am on Oct. 24, 2008 | Joined: Oct. 2007 | Days Active: 443
Join to learn more about Natsy England, United Kingdom | Asexual Female | Posts: 23,834 | Points: 39,489
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zluvsanime
Professional
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Quote: from gronk at 7:35 am on Oct. 24, 2008
 As a general rule id say sex ruins relationships longevity and fullfilment. People are so keen to ramp things up physically, before they really know the person. Its almost as if they are trying to forge a connection when there isnt really on there.
lol wat?????????? did u have sex that ruined a relationship cuz i know it as a general rule that it strengthens relationships!!!
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stupidity is a terrible thing to waste,
one never knows if you will be president
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hiddenfromlove91
Professional
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don't worry about it. if he was a virgin prior too then why should it matter because he's just as inexperienced as you are?
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Indiscribable
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gronk
Soothsayer
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Quote: from zluvsanime at 12:41 am on Oct. 25, 2008
Quote: from gronk at 7:35 am on Oct. 24, 2008
As a general rule id say sex ruins relationships longevity and fullfilment. People are so keen to ramp things up physically, before they really know the person. Its almost as if they are trying to forge a connection when there isnt really on there.
lol wat?????????? did u have sex that ruined a relationship cuz i know it as a general rule that it strengthens relationships!!!
I was going out with a girl for about 6 months, and then we had sex, and afterwards, and while it felt good it wasnt fullfilling.
We were having heaps of fun before hand and afterwards, it made things too intense. We were getting too close, I was basically worshipping her
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What are your post-retirement plans?
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7:46 am on Oct. 24, 2008 | Joined: Oct. 2004 | Days Active: 712
Join to learn more about gronk Australia | Straight Male | Posts: 4,704 | Points: 12,404
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( Anonymous )
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Quote: from Rollo Tomasi at 7:32 am on Oct. 24, 2008
and if you can't do that much then stop having sex and work on your crippling anxiety
this may well be a very good option
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