I met a girl lastnight. She's my mate's girlfriend's friend. She is very pretty, smart, and funny..
When i got to my mate's girlfriend's house, i met this new girl. We hit it off straight away, jokes, smiles, and exchanging 'shy' looks.

I went outside for a piss with my mate, and i said to him "what do you rekon will happen..? Im not expecting anything, to be honest, im sick of trying and getting nowhere."
He explained to me, that shes not the type of girl to make a move on someone while theres other people around, he said to see what happens when we go to bed in the tent.

Then we went back to where the girls were, and the girl went, and my mate's girlfriend said "She wants to be held when she goes to sleep tonight, just as a friend." So that was pretty cool.

Long story short, we went to bed, and i started to hold this girl and we kissed a few times at first. Then we started to make out.. No toung, she said she didnt want to lead me on. Because she didn't want me to be a rebound. She likes a guy, and he hurt her. Or something like that anyway..
The thing is, we got pretty intamate.. We had only had about 3 or 4 drinks each, and waited a while before we went to bed, so we were still pretty sober..

The thing is; this is the 1st girl i have met since my break up (which was at the start of the year) that i've had an instant connection with.. She seemed pretty comfortable around me during the night. She'd roll over and put her leg over my body and we'd kiss, and she'd rub my chest and play with my hair.. And every time i wasn't holding her, he'd grab my arm and put it around her and say 'hold me' and she'd hold my hand, and kiss it..

I don't know if i should get my hopes up about any of this.. I think that it could be she just wanted affection and comfort without any strings attatched.. But i like her.. And i dont' know how i should act next time i see her..
Any advice, greatly appreciated..

I can see that this must be really difficult for you right now and it seems to be like a very confusing situation.  Emotions are really delicate and therefore, they really should be handled with care.  Remember that you're never alone.  There are always people, including myself, who really care about you and want to help you in any way that they can.

I will try to give you my opinion on the situation, however I really don't know if it will be accurate.  The only person that will be one-hundred percent accurate is the girl.  I can see this must be a very confusing time for you and I'm sorry that you are currently feeling this way.

Teenage relationships are really complex.  Your teenage years will not only be full of drama and confusion but with rejection and break ups as well.  Teenagers really have a lot on their plate and don't really need these added stresses in their lives.

It's really hard to correctly analyse this situation.  First off, you mentioned that she really likes a guy but he hurt her.  This is a really tough thing for a girl to have to deal with - especially a teenage girl.  This is why I would really advise you to be careful here.  You don't want to be led on and therefore, end up heartbroken after finding out she used you as a crutch or something.

It was really mature of her to warn you about this and tell you about the way she was feeling in regards to that guy who hurt her.  You're very lucky in that sense.  I understand that she must be really hurt right now and may only be looking for comfort and not an actual relationship.  However, like I said, I really can't tell you what she wants as I am not inside her head.

If I were you, I'd hold off on an attempt at a relationship with her.  Despite how much you like her, I would move very slowly.  She is obviously very vulnerable right now and you really don't know what she wants just yet.  You don't know much about her as you've only known her for a short while.  Personally, I would take the next little while to get to know her more.  Learn about her and teach her about yourself.  Who knows, you two may be completely incompatible.  But then, who knows, you guys could be a match made in heaven.  I would strongly advise you to get to know her better before attempting a relationship.

Also, I would hold off on an attempt at a relationship because of her feelings towards this guy.  Like I said, she is obviously very vulnerable right now.  You don't want her to use you as a crutch and then drop you whenever she wants to.  You don't want to have the weight of the world on your shoulders.  It's really nice that you want to be there for her during her time of need, but you really need to be careful in this situation.

I don't want to see you get hurt.  I understand that you really like her and want to see a future between the two of you.  If you really do want this, then you really should wait a little while.  Take things slow and move at a pace in which you are *both* comfortable with.  By rushing into a relationship, you may ruin any chance of a potential relationship between the two of you.

If I were you, I'd take the next little while to get to know her a little better.  Yes, you can be there for her when she needs you and give her a hug whenever she feels lonely.  However, be wary of her vulnerability.  Do not let her get attached to you in a way and therefore, she uses you as a crutch.  That is not something you want, trust me.

Think about it this way, she obviously still has feelings for this guy who has hurt her.  Even if you two were to get into a relationship in the near future, how will you know one-hundred percent that she is completely over this guy?  Her heart is very fragile right now and therefore, you need to be very careful.

I hope I helped.  If you ever need anything at all or feel the need to discuss this further, feel free to message me any time as my inbox is always open.  I'm always happy to help.

Good luck and I hope everything works out for you.

DYL

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You're like a bullet to my brain, I'm numb, can't kill my fun.
If you're good and done then thank you just the same.
I don't owe you anything.