Adding Reply Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic What Can I do? Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post kooljack1 Posted at 7:11 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Alright, It's been a long time since I posted on here, but I used to. There is a reason I returned, so here it is. About 2 years ago, I was in 7th grade and my bus stop was by a Coffee shop. Every morning I would go in there to get a drink or something, and eventually, I got to know everyone that worked in there in the morning. 2 girls worked the register and we became friends. They lived close so one time they're like, hey come over. So I did and we were eating pizza on there front porch and a boy walks out and sits. I just looked at him, and he had to be the sadest looking person I have ever laid eyes on. I could just tell there was something with him. I started talking to him a little bit and he was really shy and really quiet and I could tell he was afraid, though I couldn't understand why. Turns out, he also works at the Coffee shop around the corner, only during closing. One night I went up there and we were talking and it turned into an every night thing. I go up there and we hang out at his job. I'm 14, he's 19. We are just friends, that is all we will ever be so don't get that idea. He said I'm one of the few people he can trust and that he feels comfortable with and he started telling me about his life. It's a very sad story. He was hit, no more like mauled by a car when he was 8. He watched both his brother, his father, and his best friend die. He's been hit and brought down all his life and the out come has turned him into a shy, timid, frigtened person 24/7. Though he told me everything except for two things that he said he has never told anyone before. He wont give me any hints except that it's bad, embaressing, it makes him cry, and he was 8 when it happened. (it was the same thing twice) I really like him, he's really sweet. Now, here's the question. What can I do? I spend a lot of time with this boy, our age difference doesn't matter. We have conversations that I can't have with people my own age because they are simply not mature enough. I saw and see a side of him no one else see's, he's really smart and funny. I want to find a way to make him like that with everyone. He has admited to cutting himself on his shoulders and ribs and he thinks very low of himself. He doesn't have many friends and he has 12 sibblings still alive, and all of them are into drugs and such. He's a much better person than that and I want to help him. Before I hear, we didn't need all the background information, he's 19 and you're 14 and you shouldn't be hanging out, he's 19 he can handle it, or anything like that, save it please. I came here to help someone in need, all I need is some advice. What can I do?

Replies kooljack1 Posted at 12:04 pm on Nov. 14, 2008 Really? Why do you think I should apply for the support leader position? Helios Posted at 8:24 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Anytime, thats what we are here for, and if you need anything dont be afraid to ask, and btw, when you are eligible, I would invite you to apply for the support leader position kooljack1 Posted at 8:21 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Thanks so much for your advice and time Helios; it means a lot. I will keep working with it, I'm not a quiter. Anyone else have any ideas? Helios Posted at 8:19 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 I am 21 and need help sometimes, no matter the age people always go through problems, although as you get older you experience a different array of problems. kooljack1 Posted at 8:16 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 That might be a good start too. See, he thinks cause he's 19 he shouldn't need help and such; though I always tell him other wise. Helios Posted at 8:14 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 well if thats how his friends are then introduce him to some of your friends and maybe he can start to trust them too. Maybe you can convince him to join Livewire, may help to see he is not alone in what he's going through kooljack1 Posted at 8:09 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 thats a really good idea. He doesn't see much except for his job, his house, his sibbling house, and now my house. Maybe a change would do him some good:] Most of his other friends are like his family, into drugs. He has done them in the past and I convinced him to lay off them a little and he is working on it. He's not like them, it's almost a form of peer presure Helios Posted at 8:06 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 like i said, see if there is someone he would be willing to talk to. If your parents will let you, go to the beach or something just to get him away from the every day life, or maybe even take him on a nature hike in the woods, there are so many places and things you can do to show him you care and other people do too, if it gets too bad have an intervention with you and his other friends telling him how much you care for him and saying you are worried about him, forming a supportive foundation is a good start kooljack1 Posted at 7:57 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Quote: from Helios at 7:53 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Let me just say that as a 14 year old dealing with issues that a 19 year old is going through, you are very mature for your age. I don't knwo you but I am happy to know that they're still supportive and caring people like you in the world and for that I tip my hat to you. Now, I am going to get what most people would say out of the way, see if he will agree to see a pscyvhologist, a school, counselor, or maybe even a peer counselor. If he is scared, tell him you will go with him and help him if he needs it. Other than that, continue doing what you are doing be there when he needs you, and maybe just by you helping him he will allow himself to open up and trust other people as well. Thank you very much. For a 19 year old, he's not very complicated. I'm sort of addicted to helping people, I don't know how to not help; guess that can be a bad thing. I didn't know that 19 year olds still have problems with cutting and such. I knew they did, but I didn't think they had the same type of problems 15 year olds have. He has taught me a lot as I have him. He's like my big brother and I want to help him the best I can, even if I am just 14. Any other ideas? Helios Posted at 7:53 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Let me just say that as a 14 year old dealing with issues that a 19 year old is going through, you are very mature for your age. I don't knwo you but I am happy to know that they're still supportive and caring people like you in the world and for that I tip my hat to you. Now, I am going to get what most people would say out of the way, see if he will agree to see a pscyvhologist, a school, counselor, or maybe even a peer counselor. If he is scared, tell him you will go with him and help him if he needs it. Other than that, continue doing what you are doing be there when he needs you, and maybe just by you helping him he will allow himself to open up and trust other people as well. kooljack1 Posted at 7:24 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Post from this position was omitted due to content violations saylsen17 Posted at 7:22 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 Post from this position was omitted due to content violations Deadman15 Posted at 7:18 pm on Nov. 13, 2008 be there for him and make sure he knows you'll always be there for him. He needs a friend to confide in and he sees you as that one person he can confide in so take the time to listen and help him the best way you know how to All 13 previous replies displayed.