Adding Reply Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic Pregnant and a busy semester Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post daloverlyme Posted at 8:48 am on Jan. 22, 2007 I'm a very responsible 21 yr old. I have two semesters till i Graduate with my Associates in Early Childhood Education. Well responisble me may be pregnant. I love my fiance so very much and him and his parents are very excited.  So excited that if im not they would like me to become pregnant. I really want to because his fathers health is getting worse very fast as is his moms. I want to have a baby but I'm not sure if I'm financially ready or if i can handle it, This semster between school full time and work i have to student teach 2 days a week. My parents would be so upset at us. My mom just had another heart attack and i fear she will have a 4th one. I'm the only one besides one cousin that hasnt had a baby out of wedlock and the only one beisides that cousin that even attempted college.  Any suggestions? Do i put everything on hold and have a baby who i will not regret or continue school and wait to have a baby (if I'm not already) and maybe cause his dad never to see his first grandbaby...which i woud regret everyday. I feel so lost in this world... April

Replies daloverlyme Posted at 1:45 pm on Jan. 23, 2007 Thank you for all your great help!! It really set me on the right track on what  i want to do and what i should do!! April dunebug Posted at 9:58 am on Jan. 22, 2007 It seems like you already know the answer to that question. You just want to please everyone. Unfortunately that is the absolute last reason you should have a baby. You need to have a baby because you want one, know you can handle one, afford one, etc. Not just because you want to get it in there before someone passes away or because someone else wants you to. They aren't the ones who are going to be paying for it, looking after it are they? ;-) My advice to you, wait. I'm a 21 year old mother of a 2 year old. I cannot possibly imagine the load you have on you right now plus a baby. Right now I'm in school part-time and that's enough. My friend JJ is in college fulltime and she's exhausted and doesn't see much of her son. My friend K is also in college full-time and barely sees her daughter and is stressed and exhausted. I guess I'd put it to you this way. Think of the courseload you have right now. Now double it. Could you handle that? That's what a baby will be like. bleedjuliet Posted at 9:18 am on Jan. 22, 2007 It really depends on what -you- want. Regardless of what we say, its not going to matter. Think about what the future would be like and all of the possible outcomes that would come with either choice and go from there. Its really up to you. I do think that you shouldn't try to have a baby just to make other people happy, though. If you do decide to have the baby, do it because its what you want. daloverlyme Posted at 9:16 am on Jan. 22, 2007 My heart is going in different directions!!!  I never thought deciding to have  a baby or not would be so hard. If i am, I have no idea what i will do. oubipaws Posted at 8:56 am on Jan. 22, 2007 Follow your heart, thats always the best idea for these situations...things will work out and follow through whatever plan you follow :) rock85cool Posted at 8:55 am on Jan. 22, 2007 I can understand the pressures of wanting or/and feeling you should have a child but If you don't think you are ready for one then it's probably best not to have one. Don't feel bad if you can't have a child at the moment, I'm sure even if they pass on they'll be happy for you. Waiting would give you a better foundation for your child and your family as a whole but in the end it's what you and your fiance decide. missfabulous Posted at 8:51 am on Jan. 22, 2007 If you are okay with putting college off for a while, then go ahead and have the baby. But like you mentioned you are not financially ready. It may be a hard decision but do what's best for you. I would like to get married before my grandma passes away but if i'm not ready to then im not going to force myself. Do what you feel is best for you. WhoElse Posted at 8:50 am on Jan. 22, 2007 if u ever need support , im me All 8 previous replies displayed.