Adding Reply Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic I want to cut. Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Anonymous Posted at 7:44 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Look. I've held this in a long time, okay? 2 fucking years, I've only done it like once. I don't even know if I have an X-acto knife anymore. But I want to cut, so badly. Even writing it's giving me this rush, it's...it's all I can control right now, when everything else is spinning further and further out of control. But a cut to the skin, that's real. It's not like emotions that fleet, that come and go, a blade and skin, a cut, pain that's not this strange, that's REAL. I come on here a lot, people know me to be cheerful, sarcastic. You know? But now it's all coming down to this want, this thing I cant ignore, and I feel like I can't tell my best friend because her other best friend cuts right now, telling my parents is out of the question, I mean, even seeing my mom and thinking those thoughts just makes me want to hurl, she's so proud of me, and I'm so happy. Good girl, good grades, good life, they don't know. They really don't, the fact that I sometimes just sit for an hour and can't stop shaking, or that each time my best friend cries, I feel like crying. I'll probably get shit replies on this topic, like, "oh, well dont cut, kay?", and I'm aware of that. But I need to get it out. I need to some how tell you all because that will make it real. If I get one good reply, that would be great. Please.

Replies hottie15 Posted at 7:59 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 umm well im in to cuting right now and trust me i wish i could stop and it sucks cuz i go deep and they get infected just think of something positive u need to go to the concler or something u really need help and just remember a cut is there for life and u will remember all the hurtfull times just looking at one so don't cuz then u won't remember them as much k. ur just going through troulbled water kllxhnnh Posted at 7:55 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Oh I feel like cutting all the time.  It's a habit and an urge that you can't just shake off.  I know how you're feeling right now.  It seems like the only thing you can control is the cutting until you realize that it is controlling you.  That's definitely not what you want.  The best thing to do would be to find a better outlet for your emotions.  When I was dealing with depression, I picked up writing.  My poems and stories seriously sucked, but that's not the point.  You have to let your emotions out in a less destructive way.  Also, I'm not going to try and make you tell your parents, but they can help you.  If you can't tell them, then you should tell someone else who you trust.  Maybe just talking to someone about it will help you. Sorry this post was so long and rambling.  I hope it helped a little. Pm me if you want. :) Queenxofxboredom Posted at 7:54 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 dont do it i use to and still do on occasion, and i hate it and it makes me hate myself, yea u feel good while doing it but when its over u still feel terrible. sometimes u feel worse. u gotta keep moving foward. what u do is work out take every thing out on those weights! yea so that y i gots 2 two pe classes. return2me Posted at 7:51 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 I dont have any revolutionary advice, but im here to help. Everyone else said good stuff, listen to them. MixedDelight Posted at 7:50 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Try finding another emotional outlet. Like writing lyrics or art. It's much healthier than cutting. greatescape Posted at 7:50 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Cutting is about as far from control as you can get.  Sure, you get that sudden "rush of energy and control" when you do it.  But what about after?  I'm sure you know how that feels....to be so low knowing that you are having to cut yourself in order to be "in control" That's not control at all.  That's letting something take you over instead of dealing with the problem directly.  Sure, it would be easy to go back to cutting.  But in the long run, it's not going to solve anything.  It's going to restart the cycle. You say the cut is real....more real than emotion.  But think about it...how is dealing with your emotions by hurting yourself a real way of dealing with things.  It's just an aversion. There are better ways to take care of this.  Talk to someone.  If you really can't talk to anyone...talk to me.  I promise to keep it confidential if that's what you're worried about. fedoragirl Posted at 7:48 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 The reason I don't cut any more is because it doesn't truly help my situation.  It's not proactive or productive.  Plus, when trying to recover from SI, it takes 7 years to completely 'heal'.  By that time, every single cell has regenerated itself and it's as if you are whole new person.  I have to keep that in mind and use it as a sort of goal for myself.   Googoie Posted at 7:47 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 I found that poetry is just as good of a way to release emotions as cutting, except there's no physical harm involved. Try it. Rachelw Posted at 7:47 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Dont cut think of ways that u can help ur frinds and your self  i know the feeling of everyone thinking your happy when your not i almost killed myself last yeat due to the facade Cherry Clouds Posted at 7:46 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 Don't cut. You'll regret it. I used to cut..and it's addicting. It doesn't help ANYTHING. If it does anything at all, it makes things worse on you. And it hurts people around you. All 10 previous replies displayed.