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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Living with Disabilities / Adding Reply

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Topic Are people afraid...
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Original Post
Erin15 Posted at 2:12 am on Aug. 15, 2008
People are afraid to be seen in public with you because of your disability?

I feel this way, and I think it's sad that even my 'best friends' will come over to my house to see me, but when they go to parties, or out say to the movies together, I'm not invited, because they are embarrassed to be seen with me.

I have Cerebral Palsy, and use a wheelchair. Only my legs and co-ordination is affected, my speech and mental capacity is completely normal.

For example, a 'friend' of mine is celebrating her 17th birthday this weekend. All our mutual friends are invited, but I am not. She is embarrassed of me, and wants to appear popular, by me being there, I ruin that image. Sad really.

Anyone else feel this way?

Replies
Erin15 Posted at 11:26 pm on Sep. 6, 2008
Coming back to this topic...

Just the other day, I was in the mall drinking coffee with a 'friend', and a good-looking guy who looked about our age was at the next table along with his friend. She started flirting with them, and they started talking to her, but as expected I was completely excluded from the conversation. I told her that I was going to the bathroom, and she gave me a dirty look for interrupting her conversation. I started wheeling away, and one of the guys asked 'who's she?' and she's just like 'umm, oh just a girl that goes to my school'. She didn't refer to me as her friend or anything.  

samantharosekay Posted at 11:12 pm on Sep. 6, 2008
because your in a wheel chair??
really!?

i know everyone has already said this but your 'friends' suck.

get some better ones that dont care if you are in a wheel chair.

jeez, my bet is your really chill.

you do deserve better, anyone who has friends embarrsed my them does.

its only me Posted at 9:51 am on Sep. 5, 2008
i have the same condition to oand i sometimes think this is the case. But there again heres were i find out who my true friends are and i have to say i have alot of them.. if people ever go to the cinemas or have a party they will ask me if i mind (which i dont) before they plan it, because if i do they re plan it for something I CAN do. I have to say i only ever once felt like that when the 'popular guy' in our school was throwing parties at his place every friday, and i was the only one in his class that wasnt invited. I do appreciate how lucky i am to have such good friends but i understand completely where you're coming from x :)
I never forget Posted at 1:43 am on Sep. 5, 2008
Your friend is a cunt. you should punch her in the cunt really hard.
Assaultrifle Posted at 8:50 pm on Sep. 4, 2008

People are afraid to be seen in public with you because of your disability?

I feel this way, and I think it's sad that even my 'best friends' will come over to my house to see me, but when they go to parties, or out say to the movies together, I'm not invited, because they are embarrassed to be seen with me.

I have Cerebral Palsy, and use a wheelchair. Only my legs and co-ordination is affected, my speech and mental capacity is completely normal.

For example, a 'friend' of mine is celebrating her 17th birthday this weekend. All our mutual friends are invited, but I am not. She is embarrassed of me, and wants to appear popular, by me being there, I ruin that image. Sad really.

Anyone else feel this way?


Your friends sound like assholes. I agree that u should get new friends. There's plenty of people who don't care about being seen with disabled people and would gladly be friends with you

BlueEyedBrielle Posted at 2:15 pm on Sep. 4, 2008
I know just how you feel. I'm 50% deaf and have mental conditions (Asperger's Syndrome and bipolar disorder) and I have no friends in my town because they are all bitches and assholes who don't like disabled students. They won't hang out with anyone but their obnoxious cliquey friends  
XxPaperFlowersxX Posted at 4:59 pm on Sep. 3, 2008
I know how you feel. Im deaf and sometimes my friends don't invite me to things because not everyone can talk to me. And 99.9% of the time if your not signing I can't talk/understand them either. I know how you feel I'm sorry.
musicfan3 Posted at 4:33 pm on Aug. 29, 2008
Quote: from Erin15 at 2:35 am on Aug. 15, 2008

Yes, I agree I need some new friends. The trouble is actually getting new friends and meeting new people. It sounds easy, but in reality it is anything but.

Like, if I was invited to this party, I could have met around 50 or so new people, but because I wasn't, I can't. That's the problem. In order to meet new friends, you have to have old ones. It's not like I can go into town right now, on a Friday night, and meet some new people. There are a number of factors preventing me from doing such things, one simply being it is physically impossible for me to get there, and my parents would refuse to let me go.  

I am not trying to sound 'woe is me, I have no friends', I'm just trying to put everything into perspective.  

Thanks for the replies so far.


Yeah this is exactly how it is. My friends aren't really friends we never talk or anything like that. I just know them because of my sister and when she and them are doing stuff its always something that I can't. Like for example, they went ice skating once and I wasn't invited cause I can't skate. I mean I'm not gonna lie and say that it doesn't hurt, but at least its better then watching them do stuff that I can't. Reading your first post your experience seemed a lot nicer then the one I had with my next door neighbor when I was in the 3rd grade.

brp002 Posted at 11:37 am on Aug. 28, 2008
that is really messed up and kinda pissed me off just right now... serously I would tell her that she is fucked up and then make new friends... but I know how hard it is to make new friends.... thats the situation i am in now... so I know its hard... But she is not a true friend.
depressedfreak Posted at 10:37 am on Aug. 28, 2008
Quote: from Erin15 at 2:12 am on Aug. 15, 2008

People are afraid to be seen in public with you because of your disability?

I feel this way, and I think it's sad that even my 'best friends' will come over to my house to see me, but when they go to parties, or out say to the movies together, I'm not invited, because they are embarrassed to be seen with me.  

I have Cerebral Palsy, and use a wheelchair. Only my legs and co-ordination is affected, my speech and mental capacity is completely normal.

For example, a 'friend' of mine is celebrating her 17th birthday this weekend. All our mutual friends are invited, but I am not. She is embarrassed of me, and wants to appear popular, by me being there, I ruin that image. Sad really.

Anyone else feel this way?


Soooo true. It's like that with me, except that i'm Blind and use a cane. It is pretty sad.

AloneAngel Posted at 4:36 pm on Aug. 16, 2008
I don't really have friends, but everyone stares at me. A friend of mine was told she had to do her hair to cover up her hearing aids when she was the bridesmaid at her wedding.
Cutierye Posted at 9:42 am on Aug. 15, 2008
What's wrong with you friends!? They are't true friends, that's what! If I was your friend I'd invite you!
Erin15 Posted at 2:35 am on Aug. 15, 2008
Yes, I agree I need some new friends. The trouble is actually getting new friends and meeting new people. It sounds easy, but in reality it is anything but.

Like, if I was invited to this party, I could have met around 50 or so new people, but because I wasn't, I can't. That's the problem. In order to meet new friends, you have to have old ones. It's not like I can go into town right now, on a Friday night, and meet some new people. There are a number of factors preventing me from doing such things, one simply being it is physically impossible for me to get there, and my parents would refuse to let me go.

I am not trying to sound 'woe is me, I have no friends', I'm just trying to put everything into perspective.

Thanks for the replies so far.

mnmandme2004 Posted at 2:23 am on Aug. 15, 2008
my sister has mild cp
but yeah its probably something more along the line of its not wheel chair assesable or something.
you should tell her how you feel about it though...
and yeah I have had some problems w/ my sister as a younger kid I spent endless hours in physical therapy waiting rooms while she would play w/ these therapy toys and get rewards for things I had been doing for years like walking for instant I was like mommy look I walk too. and My musals are loose and not tight can I go in the special swing... or bounce house type thing? but it would always be NO. so like I think I always just wanted a special time away from her disability and never really got it. like it was always be a good sister and help your older sister... you know what I mean? I was like no I want to take the short cut to school threw the mud path I want to go to the playplace at mcdonalds like my freinds... I dont want her disability to get in the way for once. mabee your friend is thinking something along this line? but cant really find the words to tell you?
manda6590 Posted at 2:22 am on Aug. 15, 2008
Hunny, she's not your real friends!
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