Adding Reply Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic What can I do? Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Firefly00 Posted at 2:47 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 Me and my girlfriend I like to think are very open with each other. We both say there isn't really anything we couldn't tell each other and we know we can come to the other one for help or just to talk to about a problem. Although I'm a very open person, she isn't. She's an independent girl, she said when we first got together it scared her how much she needed me. Whenever she has problems she's the kind of person to figure them out by herself, and not ask or tell anyone else. I knew something was wrong with her, and I've asked her what it was. She said she's just dealing with to much at the moment. I've told her I'm there for her and she can tell me anything, and I'd talk to her for as long as possible just to make her feel a little bit better. She says she knows this but she finds it hard just to let go, of her independent thinking I assume. She wants help I know, she just has to let me help her. There must be something I can do to help her? It's hurting me to know she's down and I have no control over it. Any suggestions?

Replies Riddle Me That Posted at 3:14 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 She'll open up to you when she's ready. Right now she's probably feeling insecure, and needs her space. All you can do right now is be there for her, and when she's ready, you won't be too far. Hope it goes well. sexy Posted at 2:56 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 i have the same problem opening up to my bf...i know hes there for me but before him i was so used to being on my own i've just gotten used to it now. i think he doesn't like it sometimes but i know that if i'm having a rough time just being in his arms with him holding me sometimes helps :) Rastafarian Posted at 2:55 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 Well, this is definately a problem. Seeing as how she can only open up to you on her own terms and when she is prepared to makes it quite of a challenge because she it seems she is finding it difficult to regardless of what she wants. It's of my personally opinion that she is closed up like this because of some past trama. Maybe if you'd like to get more indepth about it talk to her about why she is independant and what got her to have this attitude towards life and so on. I'm suggesting here that maybe the way to open her up is not to pry at the problem that she is not telling you, but talk to her about that unwillinglyness in the first place, since that is most likely the underlying problem in this anyways. It will most likely be a very uncomfortable subject for her but I hope she'll be able to explain it to you. Just to tell you, I'm much the same way as your girlfriend in some aspects and yes I have problems that I'm not willing to tell anyone. But sometimes I'd really like someone I could trust to psychoanalyze me kind of deal, get to the roots of this and so on. So maybe she is that same way. Good luck. mond alor Posted at 2:51 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 i was guna help then ur thing sais your bi so my only advise is get a guy parasite Posted at 2:51 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 That's like my fiancee and I except in my case it's the other way around. I'm the independant one. I find that if people just leave me alone eventually I'll feel like I'm  ready to open up. She seems to just need time to think... then she'll talk. If you need to ask anything else pm me k? Funluvin Posted at 2:51 pm on Jan. 9, 2007 Sadly it's one of those situations where you just have to wait until she's ready to 'let go' and tell you everything. I'm the same way. I can't just tell people my problems. Even my closest friends. All 6 previous replies displayed.