Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic HELP ME my bf is having problems Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from [m]robdude[/m] at 2:52 pm on Aug. 19, 2008[quote]leave him be, he will handle it his way[/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Anonymous Posted at 2:48 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 i dont know what to do with my boyfriend of 6 years. his mom dad and cousin were in a terrible car accident on the way to our high school graduation and they were hit by an 18wheeler. his cousin died instantly and his dad was brain dead when he got to the hostpital and didnt make it through the night they thought his mom would recover and even be out of the hostpital within a week. the next morning she was in a coma on life support the doctors told him it was his decision to leave her on or take her off but she would never be normal agian, he choose to take her off life support and then there was nothing anyone could do she layed in the hostpital for three weeks until her body got so week she died. he wasnt at the hostpital at the time he had gone home to take a shower and then come back iwas there when she passed away. he was extremely close to his family exspecially his mother. so i know this is an extremely hard time for him. we are living together now and so im around him all the time. but when im with him he always acts like nothing ever happened and i asked him he wanted to talk and he was like who cares. were both at the same college but have classes aat different times and i went to my class yesterday and came home earlier than he thought and i heard him crying his eyes out. but i guess he heard me come up the hall and he acted like nothing happened. then later that night we were going to go to dinner with some of his other family and when he went to take a shower i heard him crying agian. i asked him if he was alright and he was like im fine why wouldnt i be. I went to the funeral with him and i cried alot there but he didnt shed one tear why? why does he play it off like nothings wrong when im around? but then when im not cry his eyes out? i thought we were really close and he could tell me anything but i guess he doesnt think so, whats wrong with him? please help i need it. would you reccomend breaking up with him, would that help why, or why not?

Replies Wolfmanjack Posted at 9:53 pm on Sep. 15, 2008 Don't break up with him. Us guys tend not like show emotions in front of others (especially women we are attracted too.) Mainly because it is still perceived as a weakness. But be there for him and support him. EarthEmpire Posted at 3:48 pm on Sep. 14, 2008 Definitely don't break up with him, that's insensitive. He lost all his family and now he would lose you. Stick by him and let him know you're there and will help. Give him time to work with himself and don't invade his personal thinking space too much. Anonymous Posted at 3:10 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 okay i spaced it out Danarper Posted at 3:08 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 this is exactly me what  he needs is to know your there for him its not that he cant talk to you its that he wants to handle it his own way and not affect everyone else he just needs time ErnestoTheTrippyOne Posted at 2:56 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 I think I might kinda know what to do. It probably wont fix everything but it'll help. Send me a message. blessedbeaut8 Posted at 2:55 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 do not break up with!!! that's stupid just be your best by just being there. if he doesnt want to talk about it, it's okay. one day he might. he's just not ready miimii Posted at 2:54 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 Nothing is wrong with him. He's simply sad and wants to look stronger. Maybe he thinks crying is for girls? Or he doesn't want people to look at him when he's crying?   I would maybe leave him alone for a little while so he could cry out. And let him know you're there for him. (Leave him alone as in, let him be alone in his room for a while. And it would be a super bitch thing to break up with him right now.) revolutionoflove Posted at 2:54 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 don't break up with him. That won't do any good. He may feel as if he has to be strong. And he may not feel comfortable crying around anyone. Everyone is different and have different ways of showing emotions. But the worst thing that you could do at this moment is break up with him. He needs you even if he says he doesn't. He Does!!! LittleItaly Posted at 2:54 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 Post from this position was omitted due to content violations Karaden Posted at 2:53 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 Do not break up with him! Are you insane??? Men usually have a higher tendency to hide their crying due to the wrongful stereotyping of generations telling us that showing emotions is wrong and weak. He is probably having troubles dealing with his emotions and doesn't know exactly what to feel beyond the overwhelming hurt. It is a lot to take in at one time. Therefore, he will cling to the happy past that he has with you and hide the fact that he is hurting from you. In private, he will try to work out his feelings on his own. Basically, just be there for him and try to keep his mind off of it. Make sure that he knows that you are for him and he will eventually open up. Other than that, there isn't much you can do. (Besides not printing in block text... ) ladybughope Posted at 2:53 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 no dont break up with him. when you know that he's crying walk in and just hug him and tell him you are there for him and that he can talk to you about anything kristajoe2009 Posted at 2:52 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 i definitely don't think you should break up w/ him. I don't really understand why you thought you should.... just be there for him, i'm sure he's not crying around you or other ppl b/c he wants to come off as manly, not like a pussy... know what i mean? just continue to be there for him, i would want you to be there for me if i was in the same situation.... robdude Posted at 2:52 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 leave him be, he will handle it his way TrashyPerfection Posted at 2:49 pm on Aug. 19, 2008 Post from this position was omitted due to content violations All 14 previous replies displayed.