Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic This is a long one but any honest advice would be much appreciated. Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from Anonymous at 7:33 am on Sep. 1, 2008[quote]I met this girl at work and we have gone out on a few dated, and I would say its going well. Except for the fact that she is never avaliable. Now when most women say "I cant do anything this week how bout next week" I generaly think they are just giving me the brush off, but Not with this girl. She has 3 jobs and is going back to school Along with 2 volentere positions so I understand the fact that she is hardly ever avaliable. How ever that does not change the face that I have never felt this strongly for any woman ever in my life. I have not told her this yet but she defenetly knows I like her. However I dont think she realizes how big of a deal this is for me.   Unlike most guys I cant just go after any piece of tail at the bar. I have never had a one night stand in my life all my relationships have been with women I genualy care about. The honest truth is that I dont like very many women I meet in that way. Im physicaly attracted to ALOT of women but I am only attracted to a few women as a whole (mind and body). Wht this means id that I meet a woman I like about ohhhhhh every three years it seems.   But even so this one is different than the rest. We have alot of very conflicting views on religion and science (I'm the scientist and she is the faith healer of sorts) but I care for her so genualy as a person that it makes no difference to me.   Her is my problem I learned a long time ago that telling a girl your true feeling can go many different ways. She could make you the happieste man alive with her answer could crush your spirit or in the worst case scenario manipulate your feelings for her own gain. So since highschool I have never told a woman this early in a relationship. And for the first time in a long time I am really nervous about what she could say, which scares me. I mean we have been on 5 dates and I have not even tried to kiss her yet, 5 DATES!!!!   All my female friends love this girl and think we are a very cute couple so they say I should tell her how I feel so I dont loose her. All my male friends love her and say I should do the same thing for the most part. But I'm still not sure. EDIT just happened 2 nights ago So I told her how I feel the other day and she was speachless at first, if you knew her you would know that does not happen to often to her. and this was her reply. paraphrased. She is really busy in life right now (which she is I made it clear that I knew and understood that) and that she would like to take things slow since sheshe did not know if she could handle a relationship right now in her life. She then went on to say that no matter what she would alway slike to be friends, ( Which i agreed with 100% she is too important to me to throw our friendship away, but that is usualy the touch of death) The probelem is Im not really sure how to take that, does that mean we are more than freinds, just friends, in a relationship but a slow one. I usualy get a response like yes or no. Rejection or acceptance. I just dont know how to continue with it.[/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Anonymous Posted at 7:33 am on Sep. 1, 2008 I met this girl at work and we have gone out on a few dated, and I would say its going well. Except for the fact that she is never avaliable. Now when most women say "I cant do anything this week how bout next week" I generaly think they are just giving me the brush off, but Not with this girl. She has 3 jobs and is going back to school Along with 2 volentere positions so I understand the fact that she is hardly ever avaliable. How ever that does not change the face that I have never felt this strongly for any woman ever in my life. I have not told her this yet but she defenetly knows I like her. However I dont think she realizes how big of a deal this is for me.   Unlike most guys I cant just go after any piece of tail at the bar. I have never had a one night stand in my life all my relationships have been with women I genualy care about. The honest truth is that I dont like very many women I meet in that way. Im physicaly attracted to ALOT of women but I am only attracted to a few women as a whole (mind and body). Wht this means id that I meet a woman I like about ohhhhhh every three years it seems.   But even so this one is different than the rest. We have alot of very conflicting views on religion and science (I'm the scientist and she is the faith healer of sorts) but I care for her so genualy as a person that it makes no difference to me.   Her is my problem I learned a long time ago that telling a girl your true feeling can go many different ways. She could make you the happieste man alive with her answer could crush your spirit or in the worst case scenario manipulate your feelings for her own gain. So since highschool I have never told a woman this early in a relationship. And for the first time in a long time I am really nervous about what she could say, which scares me. I mean we have been on 5 dates and I have not even tried to kiss her yet, 5 DATES!!!!   All my female friends love this girl and think we are a very cute couple so they say I should tell her how I feel so I dont loose her. All my male friends love her and say I should do the same thing for the most part. But I'm still not sure. EDIT just happened 2 nights ago So I told her how I feel the other day and she was speachless at first, if you knew her you would know that does not happen to often to her. and this was her reply. paraphrased. She is really busy in life right now (which she is I made it clear that I knew and understood that) and that she would like to take things slow since sheshe did not know if she could handle a relationship right now in her life. She then went on to say that no matter what she would alway slike to be friends, ( Which i agreed with 100% she is too important to me to throw our friendship away, but that is usualy the touch of death) The probelem is Im not really sure how to take that, does that mean we are more than freinds, just friends, in a relationship but a slow one. I usualy get a response like yes or no. Rejection or acceptance. I just dont know how to continue with it.

Replies Zdrav Posted at 9:57 am on Sep. 1, 2008 Watch "Freaks and Geeks" or "Undeclared" and carefully examine Jason Segal's character in both shows: that's the kind of guy you do NOT want to be. I'm not saying that you are like those characters, but acting needy and overly emotional is not romantic or endearing, and often, it comes off as comically pathetic. Anonymous Posted at 9:41 am on Sep. 1, 2008 I would join one of her jobs but I work a fair amount of night shifts at work. We rotate every on night shifts but the thing is that I have to be ready to go on days within a weeks notice just incase something goes wrong or someone gets sick. I know its crazy but for the time being my job has been short on workers, and I am a senior member.   breannafhchick06 Posted at 7:44 am on Sep. 1, 2008 tell her how your feeling Jay JWLH Posted at 7:43 am on Sep. 1, 2008 Offer to see her in between places, like pick her up from work or tell her to call you once she gets home. Hopefully those small gaps in time might make a real difference. LadyAlice18 Posted at 7:39 am on Sep. 1, 2008 Awhh...Im sure its just because of the fact that it is early days, your heart and mind have different feelings over her.... your heart is saying "I cant bare to be without her" your mind is saying "I want like her, but I dont want to get hurt or hurt her" I know how it feels...just give it time, you two will settle and grow fonder :) SaintKris Posted at 7:38 am on Sep. 1, 2008 Just go for it when heart tells you too.. You have to feel it. igotaquestion Posted at 7:37 am on Sep. 1, 2008 5 dates sounds like enough time, you could say something and if you don't get to see her offten you could volunteer at one of the places that she does so you guys could spend more time together SpM Posted at 7:36 am on Sep. 1, 2008 You should be careful about going from one extreme (never having kissed her) to another ("you're the most amazing woman I've ever met"). Let her know you're serious about the relationship without freaking her out. JamesBrauman Posted at 7:36 am on Sep. 1, 2008 You don't have to say "I love you" or anything serious like that. Just tell her how you feel strongly for her, speak from the heart... Ldzpln Posted at 7:35 am on Sep. 1, 2008 Get a job with her. Latin Muscle Posted at 7:35 am on Sep. 1, 2008 hook up with her, sounds like your future wife. All 11 previous replies displayed.