Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic A poem I wrote called Epic Vampire Slaughter Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from [m]cherryD[/m] at 4:13 am on Oct. 25, 2008[quote]The second sentence seems too casual, the way you would say "thanks"...maybe instead of saying thanks, say something like I would be grateful or something...?[/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Anonymous Posted at 4:07 am on Oct. 25, 2008 Upon my neck I had a dream that one day I would join their ranks Upon this dream that in my head  after they bit I would say thanks And if upon I happenstance to a blooded victim find I will gouge up into her, devour her body, soul and mind Avoiding village mobs and slayers, living in coffins and tombs night would be the time to play before returning to my earthly womb alas sweet vampyre, bite this neck so I can join your epic fold I find these days and harrowed nights that I am always alone and cold Tell me what you think, I was thinking of getting it published in New Yorker capitolizing on halloween but maybe it would be more artistically viable to to wait until I have more so I can publish aa book and that way im not selling out to the man

Replies jfish Posted at 7:02 pm on Oct. 26, 2008 Any poem titled "EPIC VAMPIRE SLAUGHTER" is the best ever written in my book. And I didn't even read it yet. Anonymous Posted at 5:33 pm on Oct. 26, 2008 i just made this up on the spot as a joke, not trying to make it good after reading a really emo poem and a bunch of people saying it was good. I wanted to see if I could write an inane poem that was as emo as possible if people would like it. It took me a minute to do this shit lol tell me again Posted at 11:53 am on Oct. 26, 2008 It's really good, as far as poetry here goes. If you want to publish it... it may need a bit more of a point to it though. Rather than describing something, it needs to make a statement. Feel free to submit it though, if you don't submit you'll never know. cherryD Posted at 4:13 am on Oct. 25, 2008 The second sentence seems too casual, the way you would say "thanks"...maybe instead of saying thanks, say something like I would be grateful or something...? fluffymonster Posted at 4:10 am on Oct. 25, 2008 um yeah interesting.. Anonymous Posted at 4:10 am on Oct. 25, 2008 it really tells about my dreams emotion and desire. Do you think I should publish in new yorker or London times or which magazine is best for my first publishment work? Lala ninja Posted at 4:10 am on Oct. 25, 2008 its gory wink Posted at 4:09 am on Oct. 25, 2008 It good,I like it.Whatever you choose to do just go for. Best of luck :) EmileeM14 Posted at 4:08 am on Oct. 25, 2008 its... interesting... All 9 previous replies displayed.