Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic Ticked-Off Trannies with Knives Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from [m]jamjardee[/m] at 8:01 am on Jan. 22, 2012[quote]But you're right in that knowing someone only has transgendered and calling them the "wrong" pronoun is rude. I know that. FYI, you hardly use pronouns when talking to a person. This isn't a justification, but a simple fact. [/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post jamjardee Posted at 4:17 pm on Jan. 21, 2012 I just found my transgendered friend on facebook, which prompted me to post this movie trailer: Coincidentally, I saw the end of this movie last night and was "WTF". But it was so funny. Definitely a movie night movie. Note. My friend is a boy-2-girl. I call him a he if I have to use a pronoun, but I accept his sex change. He's so fucking hilarious, btw. He reminds me of a guidette. <-- he had that tan thing way before Jersey Shore existed. And I'm pretty sure he's from NJ.

Replies SpM Posted at 3:02 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 i'm glad this has come to a productive conclusion, and i'm sorry again for being so aggressive in the first instance. one gets rather protective of those still early in transition. jamjardee Posted at 2:46 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 I guess I am being stubborn. I will take your polite advice into great consideration. It's a lot easier for people to understand your point when you're not insulting them. SpM Posted at 2:36 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 i really should have been more tactful to begin with - bad day and all that - but everything about your conduct since has confirmed my original suspicion that you are more concerned with the trivial effort it would take you to adjust your vocabulary than you are with your friend's well-being, and i feel entirely justified in my frustration and disgust with that attitude. Sure, it might be insensitive to his choice, but that change isn't a lightswitch. when i first came out, i found it enormously difficult to assert my identity, particularly around those i had known for a long time, and several people happily took advantage of that hesitance. funnily enough, the ones who made the effort without prompting, who cared more about being "sensitive to my choice" than they did about convenience, are the ones still in my life. perhaps i'm wrong, but i reiterate my suggestion that you talk to her about it, and offer to use her preferred pronoun. if she voluntarily offers you more time to adjust, so be it, but that is an indulgence that must be offered freely, not taken without leave. jamjardee Posted at 1:52 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 I'll leave it because I know my friend. You do not. You are trans and so is he. I know his heart and he knows mine. Don't tell me I'm being ignorant or rude or a cunt when I know very well I am far from it. Don't you dare jump to conclusions and judge me for a fact you have no context about.   SpM Posted at 12:03 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 we are all somewhat oblivious to perspectives which are not our own. even the most sincere attempt at empathy is no substitute for lived experience. you do not understand what it means for her because you are not trans. i am trans, and i am telling you that i am certain you are doing your friend a great disservice. that is the whole of the argument. take it or leave it. jamjardee Posted at 11:53 am on Jan. 22, 2012 SpM, I know you're trying to help, but don't assume I'm some oblivious, emotional unintelligent being please. It's offensive. SpM Posted at 11:46 am on Jan. 22, 2012 whether or not she voices an objection, it is almost certainly upsetting for her to be constantly reminded that you do not see her as she sees herself, and that her identity is not sufficiently real or legitimate in your eyes to warrant acknowledgement. if you are any kind of friend, that will be enough for you. i am not saying this out of animosity towards you, but out of concern for her. at the very least, ask her how she feels about it, and abide by the result. jamjardee Posted at 11:35 am on Jan. 22, 2012 Go and use your modly powers and delete some "insensitive" posts or something. What a joke. jamjardee Posted at 11:34 am on Jan. 22, 2012 Quote: from Lupus at 2:27 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 This has nothing to do with being a support leader, deary. Learn about what youre talking about and you won't look so silly.   Right, ok, I still think you are being a dickwad to your friend. She might not be saying anything because she thinks you are an insensitive prick who is disrespectful of her personal choice.   Call her she, she's a fucking girl.   Not touched drugs, definitely not stupid You're awful. Insensitive prick who is disrespectful of her personal choice? No. How about friend who knows him. He's still a boy to me. That's how I know him. Will I call him she due to social situations. Sure. But personal and public are different. And you don't have to use drugs to be high and stupid, your highness. And you're dumb to think that support leaders don't have to act like support leaders. You chose to be a support leader, so act like it. No wonder davjs never comes around. SL like you suck big time. Spice Posted at 11:29 am on Jan. 22, 2012 Quote: from jamjardee at 7:25 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 Quote: from Lupus at 2:23 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 You have no idea who I am    Again, an incorrect assumption.  What's it like being wrong all the time? Wow. You're something. Back at ya Spice Posted at 11:27 am on Jan. 22, 2012 This has nothing to do with being a support leader, deary. Learn about what youre talking about and you won't look so silly. Right, ok, I still think you are being a dickwad to your friend. She might not be saying anything because she thinks you are an insensitive prick who is disrespectful of her personal choice. Call her she, she's a fucking girl. Not touched drugs, definitely not stupid jamjardee Posted at 11:25 am on Jan. 22, 2012 Quote: from Lupus at 2:23 pm on Jan. 22, 2012 You have no idea who I am Again, an incorrect assumption.   What's it like being wrong all the time? Wow. You're something. jamjardee Posted at 11:24 am on Jan. 22, 2012 I know it's ineffective. It was a typo. And there you go, defaming the name of what it means to be a support leader. Anyways, I agree with you to some extent, as I previously stated. But don't group every relationship between transgendered and non-trans as the same. It's not. And you must be high and stupid to think so. Spice Posted at 11:23 am on Jan. 22, 2012 You have no idea who I am Again, an incorrect assumption. What's it like being wrong all the time? jamjardee Posted at 11:22 am on Jan. 22, 2012 My assumptions weren't even comedic in any way. You sound like one of those dumb girls who laugh at someone to try to hide your own insecurities. Stop it. It's pathetic. You're pathetic. And I'm done with you. Most recent 15 of 31 previous replies displayed.