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Original Post
sarah is hot Posted at 12:25 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
Im feeling unsure whether I want to be in the relationship that Im in at the moment. I love my BF with everything I have but I just feel like there could be more. I just dont know how to tell him. I dont wanna break up with him but I dont wanna be feeling like this all the time. Advise?

Replies
sarah is hot Posted at 1:45 pm on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from Jay JWLH at 4:26 pm on Nov. 13, 2008

You have confused yourself considerably. You never know what you want. And even though you feel strongly about something at one point, given some time you change your mind. Trust me, that fact alone has pissed me off for over a year, and I never learn. You wanted a guy who could be up front about his desires to want to marry, have children, and all that stuff that makes you feel like you have crossed a milestone in your life. It must have been a winning reason for you to be with Brett. It sounds like the ultimate dream a girl can have.
But I think you also want a lot of the freedom either relationship-wise, or otherwise. You have had a girlfriend once, but that didn't work out as you planned. You still haven't explored what it could be like to be in a relationship with a girl who you could truly be in love with, and actually be intimate with. Even if you wanted to meet a girl to do any of that casually, I think you could do with that experience. I am still unclear about if you like girls more than guys because you find them more sexually attractive, or because you feel you can have a better emotional connection with them. It could be both.

As I remember agreeing with you once before, I said something along the lines of being too young, and by fully committing, we would be using up our youth not getting the experience we should when we are young. This was the basis of the agreement we had about that sort of open relationship. I just didn't want you to miss out on some of the important things you might have missed out, at the time.

There is also one other thing you might have to think about. The arrangements. Currently, your relationship with someone is over a long distance, so a relationship is kept going in a different way compared to someone in person. Whether that is enough to say a long distance relationship just can not work out with you or not, that idea is for you to think about. The other arrangement is where you live. You are in a rural area, where life can be pretty boring once you get back home. I can only imagine what life would be like if you didn't have your phones, also adding no Internet what-so-ever.

I hope I have given you some things to think about. Don't forget though... once you move out to that place in the east, life might be completely different, and who knows... you might actually feel you don't need a long distance relationship anymore in pursuit of a better relationship.

Ps. Considering history, is Brett just going to be another example? Just imagine all your previous relationships, and how they ended. I honestly believe that they could have similarities with the one you have now.


You make it sound like all I do is prey on men until I'm bored wit them. And by the way, Me and Brett may have problems becuase of some small things, but we can get through them. And at the end of the day, I'm just happy knowing that I have someone loving me like I love them. I did love you once, but I hated you at the same time.

sarah is hot Posted at 1:36 pm on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from Jay JWLH at 4:26 pm on Nov. 13, 2008

You have confused yourself considerably. You never know what you want. And even though you feel strongly about something at one point, given some time you change your mind. Trust me, that fact alone has pissed me off for over a year, and I never learn. You wanted a guy who could be up front about his desires to want to marry, have children, and all that stuff that makes you feel like you have crossed a milestone in your life. It must have been a winning reason for you to be with Brett. It sounds like the ultimate dream a girl can have.
But I think you also want a lot of the freedom either relationship-wise, or otherwise. You have had a girlfriend once, but that didn't work out as you planned. You still haven't explored what it could be like to be in a relationship with a girl who you could truly be in love with, and actually be intimate with. Even if you wanted to meet a girl to do any of that casually, I think you could do with that experience. I am still unclear about if you like girls more than guys because you find them more sexually attractive, or because you feel you can have a better emotional connection with them. It could be both.

As I remember agreeing with you once before, I said something along the lines of being too young, and by fully committing, we would be using up our youth not getting the experience we should when we are young. This was the basis of the agreement we had about that sort of open relationship. I just didn't want you to miss out on some of the important things you might have missed out, at the time.

There is also one other thing you might have to think about. The arrangements. Currently, your relationship with someone is over a long distance, so a relationship is kept going in a different way compared to someone in person. Whether that is enough to say a long distance relationship just can not work out with you or not, that idea is for you to think about. The other arrangement is where you live. You are in a rural area, where life can be pretty boring once you get back home. I can only imagine what life would be like if you didn't have your phones, also adding no Internet what-so-ever.

I hope I have given you some things to think about. Don't forget though... once you move out to that place in the east, life might be completely different, and who knows... you might actually feel you don't need a long distance relationship anymore in pursuit of a better relationship.

Ps. Considering history, is Brett just going to be another example? Just imagine all your previous relationships, and how they ended. I honestly believe that they could have similarities with the one you have now.


I refuse to read all that

hithere Posted at 7:44 pm on Nov. 12, 2008
ask him to do more for you. ask him to help make it feel right for you by doing whatever he can. if he cares, he'll try.
Jay JWLH Posted at 7:26 pm on Nov. 12, 2008
You have confused yourself considerably. You never know what you want. And even though you feel strongly about something at one point, given some time you change your mind. Trust me, that fact alone has pissed me off for over a year, and I never learn. You wanted a guy who could be up front about his desires to want to marry, have children, and all that stuff that makes you feel like you have crossed a milestone in your life. It must have been a winning reason for you to be with Brett. It sounds like the ultimate dream a girl can have.
But I think you also want a lot of the freedom either relationship-wise, or otherwise. You have had a girlfriend once, but that didn't work out as you planned. You still haven't explored what it could be like to be in a relationship with a girl who you could truly be in love with, and actually be intimate with. Even if you wanted to meet a girl to do any of that casually, I think you could do with that experience. I am still unclear about if you like girls more than guys because you find them more sexually attractive, or because you feel you can have a better emotional connection with them. It could be both.

As I remember agreeing with you once before, I said something along the lines of being too young, and by fully committing, we would be using up our youth not getting the experience we should when we are young. This was the basis of the agreement we had about that sort of open relationship. I just didn't want you to miss out on some of the important things you might have missed out, at the time.

There is also one other thing you might have to think about. The arrangements. Currently, your relationship with someone is over a long distance, so a relationship is kept going in a different way compared to someone in person. Whether that is enough to say a long distance relationship just can not work out with you or not, that idea is for you to think about. The other arrangement is where you live. You are in a rural area, where life can be pretty boring once you get back home. I can only imagine what life would be like if you didn't have your phones, also adding no Internet what-so-ever.

I hope I have given you some things to think about. Don't forget though... once you move out to that place in the east, life might be completely different, and who knows... you might actually feel you don't need a long distance relationship anymore in pursuit of a better relationship.

Ps. Considering history, is Brett just going to be another example? Just imagine all your previous relationships, and how they ended. I honestly believe that they could have similarities with the one you have now.

Chiefette Posted at 12:39 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
If you are unsure, he isn't the one, and it probably won't work out in the long run.
sarah is hot Posted at 12:38 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
Quote: from Glory at 9:34 am on Nov. 11, 2008

Quote: from sarah is hot at 3:25 pm on Nov. 10, 2008

Im feeling unsure whether I want to be in the relationship that Im in at the moment. I love my BF with everything I have but I just feel like there could be more. I just dont know how to tell him. I dont wanna break up with him but I dont wanna be feeling like this all the time. Advise?

I thought this was the guy that you wanted to marry and have kids with? If you break up with him, you can kiss that dream goodbye. Even if you get back together, things probably will never work out.


I know what I said. But I cant help but feel unsure.

Chiefette Posted at 12:34 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
How old are you?
Chiefette Posted at 12:34 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
Quote: from sarah is hot at 3:25 pm on Nov. 10, 2008

Im feeling unsure whether I want to be in the relationship that Im in at the moment. I love my BF with everything I have but I just feel like there could be more. I just dont know how to tell him. I dont wanna break up with him but I dont wanna be feeling like this all the time. Advise?

I thought this was the guy that you wanted to marry and have kids with?  If you break up with him, you can kiss that dream goodbye.  Even if you get back together, things probably will never work out.

face the music Posted at 12:33 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
sit down and talk with him
sarah is hot Posted at 12:29 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
Quote: from gretchx3 at 9:27 am on Nov. 11, 2008

You just said you wanted to marry him...

I do. But when Im ready.

sarah is hot Posted at 12:27 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
Its not that I dont love him I am just unsure I need this kind of relationship with anyone right now.
gretchx3 Posted at 12:27 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
You just said you wanted to marry him...
Radioactivv Posted at 12:25 pm on Nov. 10, 2008
If you have seconds thoughts, its not true love.
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