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Original Post
kendall716 Posted at 9:25 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Of relationships.


In the past I let my hormones take over which made me think about things to much which made Alex and I get into fights because things would build up.


What's the remedy to this?

Being careless.  (Not careless about the relationship.. but not caring about the petty little annoyances)
Honestly, it's not a bad thing. Especially since we're going to be living together.

If something annoys me, I just tell him to leave me alone for a few minutes while I do something I enjoy (ie paint my nails, take a bubble bath, watch my favorite show) and when I get done he's sweet and I get over my petty annoyance.


It's beautiful and I really feel no pent up anger.  


I feel like I just discovered the key to life.


And what is that??

Quit being such a damn girl!

Replies
kendall716 Posted at 9:41 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from Aimforthehead at 9:38 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

Just wondering...how do you just...'stop' caring?

It's like I said.. Instead of making a huge deal about it and sitting there thinking about it, I just do something i enjoy that takes my mind off of it. I watch a good show, or I paint my nails, read a magazine or take a bubble bath. And I've found that by doing that I just relax and then when I call Alex or he calls me we're absolutely fine. He's sweet and always makes sure I'm okay and happy.

I mean half of the things I was getting upset over were completely ridiculous. A waste of my energy.

Aimforthehead Posted at 9:38 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Just wondering...how do you just...'stop' caring?
kendall716 Posted at 9:37 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Aimforthehead,

I'm sure you're great with relationships your way. Sometimes caring about the small things is good for people, but in my case it's the worst thing. I get to stressed out. I seriously feel so...happy... right now just not caring, not losing sleep over dumb things.

We are just happy. He's happy that I'm not always unhappy because I worry about petulant things.

Hi Carie Posted at 9:35 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Its true. Guys do know. I have a book you should read. PMing you now.
Aimforthehead Posted at 9:35 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from kendall716 at 9:30 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

Quote: from Aimforthehead at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

The key to a successful relationship is not care about the relationship? Not much a relationship then in my opinion...

 
That's not what I meant.    

 

I meant to not care about the petty little things. As a girl, I've over-reacted in the past. I don't plan on doing that anymore.

Of course I still care abotu him, I always will. Even if I do get mad.



Well, I think it's good to care about small things but more to care about the person, that way you are for sure to make things better. But then again words are the cause of most fights(they usually have no meaning anyways, we just perceive them so), and yes I got that from that song "Enjoy the Silence".
kendall716 Posted at 9:33 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from holodeck87 at 9:31 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

Quote: from kendall716 at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

Since i do care, I don't want to fight.  

 And since I've figured this out.. we haven't  

 It's great!


Don't count your blessings just yet? When did this all start? lol



A while back. We've been dating two years. long enough to have problems and fix them.

kendall716 Posted at 9:32 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from perfume cowboy at 9:26 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

maybe you two just aren't that compatible

You're just pessimistic.

I love him, we are absolutely compatible.

holodeck87 Posted at 9:31 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from kendall716 at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

Since i do care, I don't want to fight.

And since I've figured this out.. we haven't

It's great!


Don't count your blessings just yet? When did this all start? lol

kendall716 Posted at 9:30 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from Aimforthehead at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

The key to a successful relationship is not care about the relationship? Not much a relationship then in my opinion...


That's not what I meant.  

I meant to not care about the petty little things. As a girl, I've over-reacted in the past. I don't plan on doing that anymore.

Of course I still care abotu him, I always will. Even if I do get mad.

kendall716 Posted at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
Quote: from barnabas at 9:26 pm on Dec. 1, 2008

haha. nice. What a handy thing to figure out. Giving people space is super important.


And you know what Carie, guys have known this all along. They've been keeping it from us! It's beautiful and I seriously feel liberated. I mean I still care about him but I don't feel the need to be petulant and argue.. Since i do care, I don't want to fight.

And since I've figured this out.. we haven't

It's great!

Aimforthehead Posted at 9:29 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
The key to a successful relationship is not care about the relationship? Not much a relationship then in my opinion...
autumn rae Posted at 9:27 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
lmao that's great.. i'll have to try that.
holodeck87 Posted at 9:27 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
That is amazing. I discovered this myself recently. It feels good doesn't it? Do things for you, ALWAYS. My uncle put it best when he said this:

"Imagine that your heart is a jug of water. You are constantly pouring out this love for others... but if you don't take time to refill your jug, you're going to be empty pretty fast."

bigredron Posted at 9:27 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
sounds like me. i get angry, yell at someone then walk away and im over it again in 2 minutes.
perfume cowboy Posted at 9:26 pm on Dec. 1, 2008
maybe you two just aren't that compatible
Most recent 15 of 17 previous replies displayed.