Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic I think I just broke my own heart... Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from [m]Niick[/m] at 9:40 pm on Dec. 4, 2008[quote]To be honest, showing her nthis very post would most likely come very close to undoing what you did. Else, just tell her what you just told us now. Youre not completely dead to her yet unless you wait too long, I doubt a few days is. You just need to prove to her that she is your [i]everything[/i].[/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post ejsrocket Posted at 9:37 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 I broke up with my girlfriend on Dec 2nd. We still loved each other (and still do... hopefully), but the relationship had come to a standstill; We simply didn't spend enough time together. When I was thinking of the different ways this could have gone, I thought that we could either try having even more dates, or that we should break off and be friends until we find a fitting conclusion. I "thought" that since we had tried having more dates a while before, and that if we tried more dates again that I'd be in this same place a later time, that we should just go straight to breaking up in hopes that we would find out if we were "right" for each other or not. But now... I've driven myself insane over the ways that she could handle this situation. I know that in my mind, she is my ideal partner; I would marry her if we were older and mature enough... but what if she decides otherwise? I don't mean to push any stereotypes on girls and women, but generally after a break up, females tend to be so deeply hurt that... well... the ex-boyfriend is "dead" to them. I thought at first that we could stay friends, and I've tried tremendously to prepare my well-being for when/if she starts to date other guys, but with the way that I feel so strongly for her... I feel that I might have taken the wrong direction with our relationship. I know in my heart that if this relationship was meant to be, that she would eventually want to come back to me... but I just don't know if that will happen. I just wish I could go back in time and beat the living hell out of myself for even CONSIDERING breaking up... I want her back, but to ask of such a thing too soon would "play" her emotions too harshly, and I don't want to break her... Advice is greatly appreciated.

Replies Niick Posted at 10:39 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Think of it this way. If we lived life without taking risks, we'd have gone no where. If you work this out and eventually lose the relationship its just even MORE experience. The way I see it, you should always stick through with something to the end, and not bail on itbecause youre afraid things might not work out. Because you never know, and youll always ask yourself, "what if?" ejsrocket Posted at 10:20 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Quote: from littlenicky40 at 9:47 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 But if you feel like you were wrong and you belong together, maybe you should just fix this, and not let ehr go through all the unnecessary tears. I have a friend outside of my state that I share everything with. If anyone could expand upon his thoughts, and give even more, deeper light upon this situation... that would be amazing. [00:14] EJSrocket: Tell me your opinion of this reply: "But if you feel like you were wrong and you belong together, maybe you should just fix this, and not let ehr go through all the unnecessary tears." [00:14] ter: Because its best to walk away with what you have right now and be done with it [00:15] ter: Because going back is like taking a gamble of double or nothing [00:15] ter: Either you come up even better than before [00:15] ter: Or you lose it all and you're worse off than you can imagine. [00:15] ter: its a gamble, simple as that [00:15] ter: I say take your experience, find another girl, and apply it there. [00:16] ter: Seeing as you managed to already have a pretty good long term relationship, you know now how to do it even better. [00:16] ter: You know what I mean? [00:17] ter: But this is all my personal opinion [00:18] EJSrocket: I'll admit that the experience could help me with other relationships, but when I could've stayed with her and given her more communication, I could've just as easily put more towards that growing experience I had with her. [00:18] ter: Thats double or nothing [00:18] ter: But like I said [00:18] ter: Thats true [00:18] ter: Are you really prepared to face the chance of falling farther than you have? [00:18] ter: You've just fallen off a cliff [00:18] ter: And now you have a choice [00:18] ter: Turn around and walk away [00:18] ter: Or risk jumping another gap to reach a ladder to bring you back up [00:19] te: You might make the jump and be happy and fine and you'd be back up [00:19] ter: Or you might miss, and suddenly you're falling even farther. [00:19] ter: Is that really a risk you want to take? I am sorry for this wall of text... ejsrocket Posted at 10:11 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Thank you all so very much for your consideration and replies. I am considering printing this page out and letting it be a love note. Would that be a nice way to pass the message along? anna rachelle Posted at 10:07 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 You are very considerate of her feelings I see, and If she loves you just as much as you love her.. then worrying about "playing with her emotions" wont even matter. Your confused. I've been in a situation ALOTTT like this. ejsrocket Posted at 10:00 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Here's another reason why this has become so awful for me. I'm a senior and she's a sophomore in high school together. She's had all of her friends, and mine as well, know that this has happened. They respect my decisions and they respect my intentions for this break up entirely. How should I act towards them now that these new feelings have overcome me? Niick Posted at 9:47 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Well I can see your intentions, that doesn't mean it was the right one. Only you can decide that. You have to decide if youre going to suck it up and try and win her back in a few weeks or whatever. But if you feel like you were wrong and you belong together, maybe you should just fix this, and not let ehr go through all the unnecessary tears. bigdutchman Posted at 9:46 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Quote: from ejsrocket at 9:43 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Does anyone think that I would jerk her emotions around by going right back to her, like, to the point that this wouldn't even matter? You made an honest mistake dude, you were just trying to do what's best from what you're saying. She shouldn't have a problem with that. ejsrocket Posted at 9:43 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Does anyone think that I would jerk her emotions around by going right back to her, like, to the point that this wouldn't even matter? taraxgoesxboom Posted at 9:42 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Talk to her, if you don't you'll always live wondering "what if?" ejsrocket Posted at 9:42 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 It's just that my original intention was for BOTH of us to go out and find new people, to see if it was necessary, but after all of this, I don't know if I should take the risk of pushing a new girl into my life and possibly lose my first girlfriend, or try to get her back ASAP. Niick Posted at 9:40 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 To be honest, showing her nthis very post would most likely come very close to undoing what you did. Else, just tell her what you just told us now. Youre not completely dead to her yet unless you wait too long, I doubt a few days is. You just need to prove to her that she is your everything. Inflamitory Posted at 9:39 pm on Dec. 4, 2008 Go talk to her. What else are you gonna do? All 12 previous replies displayed.