Quoting Post Archived Topic: It will not be bumped to the top of the forum. Topic no response and now being blamed for not telling her? Membername   Not a member? Sign Up Free (takes 20 seconds) Password   Forgotten your password? Post Font: Verdana Arial Black Georgia Comic Sans Impact   Size: Tiny Normal Big Huge   Color: Default Dark Red Red Orange Brown Green Olive Cyan Blue Dark Blue Indigo Black [ Check Spelling ] [ Post Preview ] [ LiveTags ] Quote: from Anonymous at 2:20 am on Jan. 7, 2009[quote]my gf was supposed to come over sometime while i'm visiting home so that she could get a program for her computer. i'm leaving tomorrow and she couldn't really come over up until now. she got mad at me lastnight for eating dinner with my friends at a place she wanted to eat at but couldn't blah blah blah. so anyways she didn't talk to me at all today and i called her 2-3 times and texted her in the evening about coming over for it since i'm leaving already. she called me back a couple hours later and was basically saying it's my fault for not letting her know about this earlier. the thing is, if she answered my calls or text before, she would've known earlier. usually if one of us calls or texts, the other returns it and i'm sure she'd expect me to do that too. since she didn't, she's blaming me for not letting her know earlier because now it's late for her to come over to get that program. after i failed to convince her that we return calls/texts all the time, i just said forget it and the program is here if she chooses to come get it. she refused, probably out of anger and emotion, and still was trying to say it's not her fault and stop blaming her even though i've made it a point that we're passed the faulting. what do you think i'm wrong for? what is she wrong for?[/quote] FAQ Keyword Search: Post Options Favorites Manager Notify me of new replies to this topic by email Notify me of new replies to this topic by private message Original Post Anonymous Posted at 2:20 am on Jan. 7, 2009 my gf was supposed to come over sometime while i'm visiting home so that she could get a program for her computer. i'm leaving tomorrow and she couldn't really come over up until now. she got mad at me lastnight for eating dinner with my friends at a place she wanted to eat at but couldn't blah blah blah. so anyways she didn't talk to me at all today and i called her 2-3 times and texted her in the evening about coming over for it since i'm leaving already. she called me back a couple hours later and was basically saying it's my fault for not letting her know about this earlier. the thing is, if she answered my calls or text before, she would've known earlier. usually if one of us calls or texts, the other returns it and i'm sure she'd expect me to do that too. since she didn't, she's blaming me for not letting her know earlier because now it's late for her to come over to get that program. after i failed to convince her that we return calls/texts all the time, i just said forget it and the program is here if she chooses to come get it. she refused, probably out of anger and emotion, and still was trying to say it's not her fault and stop blaming her even though i've made it a point that we're passed the faulting. what do you think i'm wrong for? what is she wrong for?

Replies HowAboutsNo Posted at 8:03 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 we have basically sorted our problem out. he knew i was ignoring him, i explained why. i said it twice, n apparently people repeating things pisses him off so he stopped replying. i was happy to sort it out, i simply wanted him to know the way he spoke to me was hurtful. I dont completely ignore texts, i read them as i get them incase it is something worth replying to. i ignored him till i woke up this morning. i didn't want to put up with my anger again all day. i am still angry at him... he always turns it on me, if i ignore him for a legit reason, he will still get upset, and ignore me because i upset him by ignoring him... so then it is me that is in the wrong. I told him off this morning for focusing too much on his feelings and ignoring mine, because if he had of treated me better i wouldn't have ignored him. I just think you should give her time to clear her head. she is probably blaming you so that she doesn't feel bad cos she hasn't got the thing she needed... if that makes any sense. she has taken it too far, and she should be able to accept that it is partially her fault as well. she probably thinks it is all your fault because you made her ignore you by going out with your mates. (yes it was still her choice to ignore you, but that's prolly how she sees it) I do admit my boyfriend and I have had a few Spats about him going places without me. I never got to go anywhere, and it really upset me when he went places without me for said reason, and because he wouldn't text me. and he wouldn't listen to me at all if i asked him not to go, because i didn't give him a "good enough reason". oh i meant try work out why it upset her so much that you went out with your friends... ask her that. the best thing to do is to figure out why it bothered her, so then u can tell her you didn't mean for it to seem like that and stuff. Anonymous Posted at 12:00 pm on Jan. 8, 2009 Quote: from howaboutsno at 5:23 am on Jan. 8, 2009 oh man. relationships suck arse. i have my own dilemma now, and I have been ignoring my boyfriend. but i actually want him to talk to me, and i want him to accept what he did was wrong. argh. seems like ur other half is stubborn. Perhaps try to investigate why it got to her so much? i think in this case it got to her because she needed something. the thing is if she didnt ignore me, she wouldve known about it earlier. i couldve reminded her or let her know the day before but she couldve answered my calls and text. shes saying she was busy even though i find it hard to believe that she was that busy where she didnt check her phone because she wasnt. now im thinking shes angry she didnt get what she needed and tried to fault me and im not sitting back and apologizing like all the time. i dont even know when she last took blame for something and i dont know why shes always so focused on whos to blame. why are you ignoring? does he know what you think he did wrong? if hes trying to contact you, maybe you shouldn't ignore and talk about it instead... HowAboutsNo Posted at 5:23 am on Jan. 8, 2009 oh man. relationships suck arse. i have my own dilemma now, and I have been ignoring my boyfriend. but i actually want him to talk to me, and i want him to accept what he did was wrong. argh. seems like ur other half is stubborn. Perhaps try to investigate why it got to her so much? Anonymous Posted at 12:40 am on Jan. 8, 2009 she still is holding her ground and seems to want to focus on who is to blame rather than the solutions. she said not to call her or text her, she'll contact me when she's ready. apparently she thinks i'm trying to place all the blame on her, which i actually said i'll take some blame and you take yours, but she doesn't like that. she says i always try to place blame on her, but really, i don't remember what the last thing was that she actually faulted herself on. Anonymous Posted at 3:32 am on Jan. 7, 2009 Quote: from howaboutsno at 2:57 am on Jan. 7, 2009 remind her that she hasn't got the program and is making it worse by being so stubborn. I do alot of stupid things like that to my boyfriend... ok well not like that, i don't blame him for things. but i get annoyed when he goes out without telling me an not listening to what i say or what i want... but yeh... i dono, i generally do things cos i want to feel loved. anyway in this case i do think it is her fault because she was ignoring you. but i think you should apologize for eating out with your friends but still remind her it is her fault she didnt know earlier because you had tried calling her. i did remind her, i said forget the blame game and this is the situation and it's here if you want it. i'm not sure how much to apologize for eating with my friends because she just couldn't go because her sister is controlling (can't explain, she's just psycho) and so we ran outta time and my friends happened to invite me there for dinner to say bye. this was pretty much the only time i've eaten with my friends without her while visiting home. i don't wanna apoligze too much because i kinda think i have the right to do that since she does it more than i do. to me, it's one of those unfortunate conincidences that can't be helped, but she seems to take things personally and hold that anger to a point where it takes a lot for me to move her passed it. Anonymous Posted at 3:27 am on Jan. 7, 2009 Quote: from SpasticTurnip at 2:53 am on Jan. 7, 2009 Don't mind her.. she's quite prideful and will hold anger for days. HowAboutsNo Posted at 2:57 am on Jan. 7, 2009 remind her that she hasn't got the program and is making it worse by being so stubborn. I do alot of stupid things like that to my boyfriend... ok well not like that, i don't blame him for things. but i get annoyed when he goes out without telling me an not listening to what i say or what i want... but yeh... i dono, i generally do things cos i want to feel loved. anyway in this case i do think it is her fault because she was ignoring you. but i think you should apologize for eating out with your friends but still remind her it is her fault she didnt know earlier because you had tried calling her. SpasticTurnip Posted at 2:53 am on Jan. 7, 2009 Don't mind her.. Anonymous Posted at 2:30 am on Jan. 7, 2009 Quote: from lestat1990 at 2:24 am on Jan. 7, 2009 ur wrong because when it's somthing stupid and ur only around for a short time you go and knock on her door till she shows up and you hug her like mad. the woman is always right and when there is more than one you don't say a damn thing. she is wrong be cause she was being petty and still is. bottom line we as men are always at fault. it appears that way. it's funny how she can justify herself and be so focused on who's the blame and her own innocence that it really gets her nowhere. she's in need of something yet her pride won't let her see clearly or put that aside. and i thought pride was a male problem. anybody have ideas on how to handle this? lestat1990 Posted at 2:24 am on Jan. 7, 2009 ur wrong because when it's somthing stupid and ur only around for a short time you go and knock on her door till she shows up and you hug her like mad. the woman is always right and when there is more than one you don't say a damn thing. she is wrong be cause she was being petty and still is. bottom line we as men are always at fault. blufindr Posted at 2:22 am on Jan. 7, 2009 She's being a bit of a princess. It's her fault for getting shitty. All 11 previous replies displayed.