to me that is the ultimate thing that matters to me, i want to be able to have a girlfriend that i can tell that i love, and really, truly mean it
i remember my first crush that i ever had that set the precedent of how i would act towards girls from then on
in first grade when i was the age of six i had a crush on this girl, and in first grade when everything was girls vs boys and being with a girl was a bad thing if you were a boy, what did i do to show this girl that i had a crush on her?
i didn't push her down or make fun of her
the thing that i remember that i did, was i let her cut in front of me in line so that she could be the last one to go down the slide before everyone had to go inside from recess
and since then all i have ever done to show a girl that i cared about her was try to be nice, i try t tell her good things about herself whether it be looks or personality, i try to make her feel good, and i try to make her happy
i do this because any time a girl that i care about feels happy, it makes me feel happy, and if i am the one who causes her to feel happy, it makes me feel twice as happy as that
all i want is to have a girl that i can make happy, and show that i love her
but as a sophomore in high school i have never had a girlfriend, i have never kissed a girl, and the closest i have ever gotten to be with a girl was a hug, a hug from one of my friends who was a girl, because she felt bad that her boyfriend broke up with her
i wished that this girl would have gone out with me, hell i even told her later when we were talking about how she had broken up with her boyfriend that if she had went out with me, she would never have another relationship problem again
to which she replied with "i know" and that was the end of it
every single time i like a girl and try to show her that i like her we can be happy together, we can laugh together, i can help her and make her feel good, and this makes me feel good
but the one thing that no girl i have ever cared about has ever been able to do with me, is be able to care about me as more than a friend
ever.
i try so god damned hard whenever i care about a girl to make her happy, and i try to show her that i care about her, and i try to make her feel good, and i try to show that we would be good if we were to go out with each other
i try so i can find any type of response that she in interested in me, but i never find that
i have never once had a girl show me in any way shape or form that she is interested in me, ever.
i'm not one of those nerdy guys, and i'm not one of those jocks, i try to be myself all of the time, and i have alot of friends, and people like me the way i am
but no girl has ever wanted to be more than my friend ever.
i hate the fact that i have never had a girlfriend, and have never been able to get a girlfriend, but all of the time i see so many other guys who are obviously only interested in a girl to serve themselves
guys that don't care about a relationship or the girl, but only care about sex, or just get a girl because they want to say they have one i realize i might have a pessimistic view on other guys, or i might be flat out wrong about some other guys, but from all of my experiences, i am right in what i say
and in the end of those types of relationships it always ends with the guy moving on, and the girl feeling horrible after the relationship is over, when if those same girls had given me a chance i would have made them feel the happiest they have ever been in their entire lives
every single time that i care about a girl, and it goes absolutely nowhere for so long to the point where i just give up, or i care about a girl so much and while i am with her trying to show her that she tells me about her new boyfriend, it hurts
it hurts really bad, and every time it has hurt worse and worse
the only thing that i do when that happens is try again, and i keep trying, but it is really getting to the point where i question why i keep trying
sure sometimes i feel bad that maybe i am expecting too much of these girls, or that i am just being selfish, and that i should make them happy just for the sake of making them happy
then i remember how bad it hurt the last time a girl was blatantly obvious towards me that she didn't care about me in the least, except when i was helping her, or i remember how badly it hurt me that they don't care
i am not a saint, and you could call it selfish, but that is the reason that i tell myself that it is ok that i stop being overly nice, or going way out of my way to help a girl that i used to care about, when she doesn't care about me
because i have never had a girlfriend i don't know if i could ever live up to all the things i think i would be able to do in a relationship, and i don't know if i could show my girl that i love her, and i don't know if i could make her feel better than she has ever felt before
but what i do know is that if i ever had the chance i would try
i would try as hard as i could to show her all of those things, and to make her happy
and if i failed, i would try again even harder
i have never gotten a chance to show a girl how i feel, and to make her feel good
and i don't know if i ever will
i wish that i could have a girl who i could tell i love her and really truly mean it, a girl i could make happy, and a girl i could care about, who would care about me back
25% say become a manlier man: i am a confident and respected person, you may have misinterpreted my completely honest post as making me a feminine man, i am not
25% say stop trying so hard: i can only speak from what i think that i do, but i do not see myself as smothering girls or trying too hard, i try to do what i feel is right, drop hints, flirt, make them laugh, but also be helpful and nice.
my goal isn't always to simply make the girl happy, but to make it so that i can be happy WITH her
i have the choice between accepting i just haven't found the right girl yet
or that i am doing something wrong and not sending the right signal, or just sending a signal that is pure and good, but too different than the norm so it is dismissed
or a little bit of both
I appreciate all of the replies, and all of the future replies
I do not know how i will choose to continue handling my problem, but i will try, and i figure that is the best i can do
In your mind and possibly reality says that what you have been doing is not working or you just haven't run into the right girl yet. However I will give you some things to think about;
1. Girls are typically more emotional, compassionate and sensitive than guys. These apparently are the same qualities that you possess. Girls typically are not attracted to someone like them. They want a guy that they trust, look up to, respect, loyal, trustworthy, make them laugh, have fun with them but are opposite in personality than they are.
2. I have no clue what you look like or how you act. Girls look for guys for strength and leadership normally combined with masculine qualities. You can look at yourself in the mirror and instantly see what is good and what needs some work. If you dress sloppily, poor hygiene and have an out dated hair style you should consider changing it. If your body needs to be slimmed down then do something about it. All girls like to be seen with someone that they are proud to be seen with. Again, I have no clue if these fit you but if you are smart enough to write what you did you are smart enough to conclude what your problems are.
3. As a sophomore in high school you may be pushing too hard. Males typically develop a little slower physically than girls so the girls your age may be attracted to guys a year or so older. My suggestion would be for you to stop working so hard in developing a relationship. Girls sense it and if they feel it too strong they also feel pressured. Be yourself, relax, don't look at all girls as girlfriends but someone to get to know and have fun with. Relationships develop from friendships often. A guy that is too sensitive will quickly become another girl friend to the girl. You don't want this.
I feel your pain and frustration. I hope you quickly find happiness.
Good luck.
aww thats so sweet.. there aren't many guys out there that are like this.. you're one of the unique ones i guess.. if don't worry I'm sure the time will come where a girl will express their feelings towards you.. you'll just have to wait. Flying solo has it's benefits and it's not that bad. Just enjoy your life with more freedom until the right one comes along.
One of the reasons these girls keep you in the friend zone is because they don't want to loose the feeling that they are given by you, and if things were to go wrong between the two of you she would loose that and basically there guy mate who makes them feel better when their love life is going horrible wrong.
I know it's not fair that you are getting treated this way however you need to try and get to the route of the problem as to why they don't want to date you. The thing is that means getting on and asking these girls what you do wrong, nerve wracking yes, worth it yes all because then you will know what you can do in future about it.
I say also get out of your comfort zone of friends and mix so much more, because you can always find someone as there is always someone who will want to date a sweet guy rather than get fucked about my an asshole of a guy. Yes girls are odd for their choices in guys sometimes, seeing as they normally pick the guys they know who will treat them the worst.
I have to admit I admire what you do, watching the girl(s) you like be with other guys and pick up the pieces however sometimes you do need to think about yourself and you needs. So think of today as a new day and see what will happen. Start talking to the girls and find out where you go wrong.
Good Luck I know it's not nice to be in the friend zone but only you can get yourself out of it.
Its all about confidence. Knowing you have what they want. Know all that stuff you want to say to them or how you want to treat them is ten times above other guys.
Carry that confidence on your shoulders. Wear it on your face. be proud of who are. Dress the occasion and take the plunge.
Im sorry man, but you gotta get some balls and man up. It takes a lot. I know. Im a dude. I've been there. But you just got to show the girls that you may like, not in an insane possessive, and scary manner mind you, that you are strong.
And that you posses all the qualities that they might want in a man.
another thing.....you, like me are a teenager, just wait a little while, and the girls will realize what a good boyfriend you will make, at least SOMEONE will. I guarantee that when you get older, you are going to be getting a true relationship, one that is good, and long lasting; where the assholes will just get one night stands, and shit thrown in their faces.
The problem is, all girls see you as a friend they can rely on, one who they can talk to when it's going rough, one who won't crack jokes at them, or be rude.
Basically, you're a good friend, and they know that, and don't want to ruin it by going out with you. It's a sad truth.
413 users online 
225362 members 250 active today Advertise Here
413 users online 225362 members 250 active today Advertise Here
You have 1 new message.
