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Original Post
symbolxsexy Posted at 4:15 pm on July 10, 2009
so I have been going out with my boyfriend for a month. He had a g/f for 3 weeks and thats the only relationship he has been in. So i guess you can say im his first real g/f. Anyways.. he doesnt seem to show how much he likes me and it kinda puts me off guard because im used to my other ex boyfriends hugging and cuddling and kissing me out of random and he doesnt do that. Also when me and him hang out there isnt much to do so we end up walking around town which gets kinda boring when you have no destination. I also cant stand when he doesnt text me all day because it makes me feel like he isnt thinking about me. I do text him first sometimes but usually its him, i just get upset when he texts me at like 10 at night and just leaves me hangin through the day. Idk what to do about this because i really want to make it work between me and him. He told me about a week ago how much he really does like me and is sorry that me and him dont hang out as often and just wanted to let me know that he does and wanted to know if i felt the same about him and of course i said yes. Im just wondering have any of u been in this situation where you are totally caught off guard because your new boyfriend doesnt show you how much he likes you? I dont know if maybe he isnt even ready for a serious g/f at this moment or if he just needs time to get comfortable but you would have figured after a month.. we would have gotten a little bit closer but im not so sure.

I would really like some honest advice because this has been on my mind and is really stressing me out. I want to be happy about me and him, not worrying.

Replies
symbolxsexy Posted at 6:42 pm on July 10, 2009
Quote: from xchazzyx at 4:47 pm on July 10, 2009

To be honest that does sound a little wierd, the early days i always think are the best and you spend hours talking about absolute rubbish. It does work both ways, time apart sometimes helps to develop own interests and space so you have more to talk about but maybe you two arn't that comfortable yet, in which case i would have thought you need to spend more time together.

And again i would recomend talking to him, it might be quite a hard thing to ask, but just ask him if hes alright n comfortable with you because you always feel asthough you make the first move. Not trying to be offensive but men are quite slow you have to spell it out for them.

When me and my boyfriend had started sleeping together, he kinda made me feel like some sort of sex addict because he would never initiate it, and i never knew wether i was being stupid or he didn't like me or wasn't attracted to me e.t.c and it made me so upset in the end that i had to say, and again he was obvilious and said he didn't realise he was doing it and he understood how it made me feel.

If you don't tell him how you feel, he wont know, and wont do anything about it.



thanks alot for your help :)

xchazzyx Posted at 4:47 pm on July 10, 2009
To be honest that does sound a little wierd, the early days i always think are the best and you spend hours talking about absolute rubbish. It does work both ways, time apart sometimes helps to develop own interests and space so you have more to talk about but maybe you two arn't that comfortable yet, in which case i would have thought you need to spend more time together.

And again i would recomend talking to him, it might be quite a hard thing to ask, but just ask him if hes alright n comfortable with you because you always feel asthough you make the first move. Not trying to be offensive but men are quite slow you have to spell it out for them.

When me and my boyfriend had started sleeping together, he kinda made me feel like some sort of sex addict because he would never initiate it, and i never knew wether i was being stupid or he didn't like me or wasn't attracted to me e.t.c and it made me so upset in the end that i had to say, and again he was obvilious and said he didn't realise he was doing it and he understood how it made me feel.

If you don't tell him how you feel, he wont know, and wont do anything about it.

symbolxsexy Posted at 4:38 pm on July 10, 2009
Quote: from xchazzyx at 4:30 pm on July 10, 2009

Erm, im not sure what to suggest. I feel this way also with my boyfriend, but its not constantly, but ive felt that way on a couple of occasions. And i try several things to try and ignore it basically, ive tried doing the same things back, not text him much not see him that often e.t.c, which worked a few times.
I've tried being arsy, and giving hints - he was oblivious and confussed.  
I've tried making more of an effort, hints, and that doesn't work, you just look like a nag.
So when all that fails i just tend to end up talking to him about it, tell him that im a bit unhappy that he never seems to text me, or its not for hours after ive text him e.t.c e.t.c being as honest but as nice as possible, and i just explain what was wrong and what i would like a little more of.
So thats all i can suggest to you, just talk to him about it. And over time i noticed him trying to make more and more of an effort, and hopefully if you tell your boyfriend how you feell, he will atleast take on board what you have said.

Yeah i understand what your saying. Like since he never made out before.. i was kinda hesitant about making the first move cuz i didnt know if he really wanted to kiss me.. but we have finally got past that make out session a week ago. but it sucks cuz i feel i gotta make the first move all the time and its just like what if he doesnt wanna kiss me? so yeah..

i guess only time will tell.. which suckkss.
we also text pretty much everyday so we run out of things to talk about so maybe a little time apart is what we need but its pathetic cuz we only been going out a month!

xchazzyx Posted at 4:30 pm on July 10, 2009
Erm, im not sure what to suggest. I feel this way also with my boyfriend, but its not constantly, but ive felt that way on a couple of occasions. And i try several things to try and ignore it basically, ive tried doing the same things back, not text him much not see him that often e.t.c, which worked a few times.
I've tried being arsy, and giving hints - he was oblivious and confussed.
I've tried making more of an effort, hints, and that doesn't work, you just look like a nag.
So when all that fails i just tend to end up talking to him about it, tell him that im a bit unhappy that he never seems to text me, or its not for hours after ive text him e.t.c e.t.c being as honest but as nice as possible, and i just explain what was wrong and what i would like a little more of.
So thats all i can suggest to you, just talk to him about it. And over time i noticed him trying to make more and more of an effort, and hopefully if you tell your boyfriend how you feell, he will atleast take on board what you have said.
symbolxsexy Posted at 4:22 pm on July 10, 2009
but its not even that.. he wont text me all day so its like wow does he even like me at all? and we see each other like every 4 days.. and we live.. like 5 blocks away from each other.. thats what i dont understand
HideOrSeek Posted at 4:18 pm on July 10, 2009
Quote: from dont notice me at 4:17 pm on July 10, 2009

holy text

holy text

Dont Notice Me Posted at 4:17 pm on July 10, 2009
holy text
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