my mom is funny and talented, very dramatic and theatrical, like me which is why i relate so more easily to her. but is also very annoying but for some reason i thrive off that anyways. which i know isn't healthy. i have to like and dislike them equally somehow.

ok my dad is very obvious he has the whole unpredictable anger (actually its pretty predictable, usually at the small stuff somehow i guess he can't comprehend the big)

my mom makes too MUCH of a big deal in a good way over small things, saying im good despite poor grades, that everything i do is funny, that i DONT HAVE TO TRY. i try to be mad at that, but im just not. i don't know how, it's like either way i hate my dad and love my mom. its like im almost afraid to love my dad because it'd somehow be gay, or embaressing because i'd be giving HIM power and the knowledge that i respect him, which he so obviously pulls along like a giant ball and chain "dylan WHY DONT YOU LET ME IN?!"
i'm gonna love both of them equally because its gonna mess me up in the long run if i don't. but how?