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Topic I want to get away from my parents and live on my own.
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Original Post
beingme Posted at 8:51 am on Nov. 23, 2008
Any advice?

I just feel like I can't be independent while I'm living under my moms roof. I feel trapped somehow. I'm a junior in high school and I'm going to another school in the same town so I can finish hs in less than a year, (faster) so that's a pointer, then I'm looking for a job, part time I guess while I'm going to classes. I would like to get an apartment to live on my own, but I don't have enough money. What should I do?
If I worked at a store would it even pay the rent? And even if it did I'd probly jus be working to pay rent and not for clothes or going to the movies or ven paying my gas right?
Ughhhhh!!!!1 I seriously don't know what to do, I just want to become more independent, how can I do that? And it also doesn't help when my mom talks to me like I'm a 10 year old, and no, I do not act like a 10 yr old, I'm very mature.
Ahhh!
Please help!!

Replies
beingme Posted at 4:35 pm on Nov. 24, 2008
Thanks for the advice! I'm actually doing just that, when I finish high school I'll be somewhere else.
LoveKay Posted at 10:05 pm on Nov. 23, 2008
Usually, people struggle with rent when living by themselves... even when they have roommates to split the bill with. You can begin being more independent by getting a job, to begin with. I know you said you're doing that, so that's good. You need to finish high school before you move out though (most places won't let you rent if you're under eighteen anyway) because if you have a lot of bills to pay you might end up dropping out and your life will forever be miserable.

You need to tell your mom you're independent. You can solve this issue much more easily without having to move out. You need to talk to her and tell her you need to be treated the age you are, and you will start paying for your own things now. As long as you have a job, you can pay for it either way.

Believe me, living on your own will eventually wear you out and you're going to wish you stayed with your mom longer.

MiNNiCK Posted at 9:05 pm on Nov. 23, 2008
Quote: from tell me again at 3:54 pm on Nov. 23, 2008

Minnick, maybe people don't "understand" you because you always have a patronising, "suck it up" attitude when teenagers brings up their completely valid feelings. And you pass that off as intelligence when you don't actually know shit.  

beingme, it's good that you're looking for a job now. But you might have to be patient and live in your current situation until you save up a bit more money. Also, try to look for a job where you might get some sort of advancement that helps your income (eg training new people at a supermarket might give you a slight wage increase). And in general, just try to save money.  

Depending on your relationship with your parents, you might also get them to help you once you've moved out. I'm not sure from your post if you just want *some* independence, or if you want to be completely independent from your parents. Would they be open about buying you some household items without suffocating you and trying to control your life? Also, can you afford to give up your car?  

I'm just saying it could be a slow progress, but you can do it little by little, and gain "full independence" maybe in a few years.


Haha, right. Like any thing I remotely said was a "suck it up" It was reality that she needed to ask herself. I get really tired of people trying to pass me off as being some cunt. Because I'm not.

Most of my posts aren't even "suck it up" though sometimes, teens do need that sort of talk. But whatever, you children can think as you wish.

beingme Posted at 1:06 pm on Nov. 23, 2008
I agree, thank you! : )
It will be a slow progress, but I wil get there to get full independence.
tell me again Posted at 12:54 pm on Nov. 23, 2008
Minnick, maybe people don't "understand" you because you always have a patronising, "suck it up" attitude when teenagers brings up their completely valid feelings. And you pass that off as intelligence when you don't actually know shit.

beingme, it's good that you're looking for a job now. But you might have to be patient and live in your current situation until you save up a bit more money. Also, try to look for a job where you might get some sort of advancement that helps your income  (eg training new people at a supermarket might give you a slight wage increase). And in general, just try to save money.

Depending on your relationship with your parents, you might also get them to help you once you've moved out. I'm not sure from your post if you just want *some* independence, or if you want to be completely independent from your parents. Would they be open about buying you some household items without suffocating you and trying to control your life? Also, can you afford to give up your car?

I'm just saying it could be a slow progress, but you can do it little by little, and gain "full independence" maybe in a few years.

beingme Posted at 9:48 am on Nov. 23, 2008
Yo, your not even worth arguing with, your just a "supposeably smart" stuck up lil bitch. Laters!
MiNNiCK Posted at 9:37 am on Nov. 23, 2008
Quote: from beingme at 12:34 pm on Nov. 23, 2008

I am smart, and I most certainly don't brag about it. If you were smart enough you would shut up. And yes, I've had a job before and I'm looking for one now, and I'm going to be living alone as soon as I turn 18. I didn't want to sound mean or anything but you are concluding things you think you know about me and in reality, you do not. Thank you very much!


Oh my god, this is why I don't explain things! I never get through to people! I'm not saying I'm smarter than anyone, I'm just saying people stupidly misunderstand me. Why are any of the questions I asked me "concluding" about you? I'm looking at the REALITY of things for the situation of what you gave us...jesus christ. I wasn't being a bitch, I'm giving you REAL LIFE situations here on how things could go since you think you can live on your own. Obviously though, since you can't answer why you don't have a job now or why you aren't answering the other questions just goes to show how "mature" you really think you are. Christ.

beingme Posted at 9:34 am on Nov. 23, 2008
I am smart, and I most certainly don't brag about it. If you were smart enough you would shut up. And yes, I've had a job before and I'm looking for one now, and I'm going to be living alone as soon as I turn 18.  I didn't want to sound mean or anything but you are concluding things you think you know about me and in reality, you do not. Thank you very much!
MiNNiCK Posted at 9:25 am on Nov. 23, 2008
Quote: from beingme at 12:15 pm on Nov. 23, 2008

I do not want more independence because its how you say "cool" I'm doing it for my own good. My mom has always given me everything I've wanted. But I want to earn it, and get things on my own. You know?  
I hate that she always hands everything to me. It won't stop, I don't mean to sound selfish or ( I can't even find a word for it) but I'm just saying I want to do things on my own for a change, is that so bad.....

You totally misunderstood my connotation with "cool" but I'm not going to explain it because most people on here don't get things I say. I'm too smart for my own good. It's not bad that you want to earn things on your own, but you're not going to survive doing it the way you are planning to. It is not easy earning to live by yourself. You are still young, you have no money, you will not survive on your own as you stand at the moment. Why is that hard to understand? Why don't you talk to your mother about how you want to be more independent on your own? Why don't you look for a job now? Have you even ever had a job? You can't just wake up one day and decide you're living on your own without seeing the whole picture.

beingme Posted at 9:15 am on Nov. 23, 2008
I do not want more independence because its how you say "cool" I'm doing it for my own good. My mom has always given me everything I've wanted. But I want to earn  it, and get things on my own. You know?
I hate that she always hands everything to me. It won't stop, I don't mean to sound selfish or ( I can't even find a word for it) but I'm just saying I want to do things on my own for a change, is that so bad.....  
MiNNiCK Posted at 9:03 am on Nov. 23, 2008
Getting an apartment by yourself is a huge step. There is more than just "paying rent" involved. Responsibility is a huge factor. If you don't even have a job now at age 17, when you could have had one at 16, how are you going to get one when you decide to move out? You should have been saving money...most minimum wage jobs will not give you enough to buy all the things entailed in living by yourself. So you'll end up being behind on your first month's rent and starving granted you live by yourself. I don't get the fad of teens nowadays not wanting to be supported by their parents. They are giving you a home, food, etc. and yet people want more independence. I mean sure, being independent is "cool" but it's more than just the face value that teens give it. It's more than just being mature. It's a large group of things.  Maybe you should just deal with your mother right now until you can find out if you're going to college or what you're doing.
beingme Posted at 8:58 am on Nov. 23, 2008
I'm 17 and ill be graduating in like may or so
Monroe Posted at 8:53 am on Nov. 23, 2008
You can't get an apartment when you're under the age of 18, and most won't even rent to any one under the age of 20.

You're just going to have to live with your mom, and get through it. It's part of growing up. Some day, when you're older, you'll appreciate your mom for supporting you.

You're still a kid, and you'll be a kid until you're 18/or you graduate.

longliverock2 Posted at 8:52 am on Nov. 23, 2008
get a couple friends to live with you and share the rent.
santana 08 Posted at 8:52 am on Nov. 23, 2008
How old are you to begin with?
Most recent 15 of 15 previous replies displayed.