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Topic problem with a friend (long!)
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Original Post
MaryLin Posted at 11:40 am on Nov. 25, 2008
Thanks to everyone who cares to read this...

So I've known her for a bit over a year now and we became great friends in a short time when she came to my class. We've had great fun together and shared similar ideas, talking about many personal things and been very close friends. Anyways, this autumn things have changed.
This summer I started to feel her wish to rule over me but I didn't pay much attention to me. However, her growing selfishness and thinking she's the most important, thus having a right to always get what she wants has truly started to annoy me. For example, once having forgotten my glasses to her place I called her the next day to tell her about it. She said: I know. Would it have been so hard for her to let me know the next second I left? She knew about it all this time. That is just one example, not a very serious one.

Okay so about more than a month ago we had to do this oral presentation together for a class. As neither of us had any chance to print the sheets out (we were planning to use them for peeking) we thought we could print out at school but for some reason we couldn't. So I thought, I'll go and write my text down (I had my file on a memory card) and still do it; she came after me to the computer classroom and insisted on going to Wikipedia so she could read the text to revise. I told her: but I have this text of my own, I'll just write it down and it'll be ok, if you want to read the wiki article, there are some more free computers. My god did she get pissed! She told me to fuck off and didn't speak to me for days afterwards. What did I go wrong?? Nothing! She just can't ever accept a simple compromise if she doesn't "win". even when we were discussing how we should do the presentation she wanted to do it her way and when I tried to insist on my ideas, she got mad at me. In the end the teacher just let us do it the next time.. I don't know what she told him cus I would have been ready.

There is a tradition called teachers' day in my country which means that the actual teachers get a day off (they go to the staff room, drink coffee and eat cake) and the senior classes replace them. We picked some elementary school class and I knew that wouldn't ever turn out well. I thought correctly... As I have real teaching experience I thought it would be real good for me but no, whenever I tried to get involved in the teaching process, she started accusing me of contradicting her and telling the opposite thing. Actually she was completely failing in telling the 8 year olds what they had to do so I only tried to explain it better but she wouldn't let me do it because it was "wrong"! We were supposed to give 2 classes and she thought the first one was to be given my her (estonian) and the other one by me (music). Ok, I went with the compromise. So when "my time" came, she still wanted to be the boss. She said she knew how to play piano well but she completely sucked at it, accusing the kids of singing too fast which is why she played so badly. Like, wtf??

Now the last thing was again with the class where we had to perform the presentation. This time we had to do some group work with her and the first thing she did was putting my thoughts down. I couldn't take it anymore so I asked: why are you always putting my ideas down as if they didn't matter at all? She refused to accept that and made me look like a complete failure as if she was again the one who had the right to be anything she wanted. Finally she refused any kind of collaboration with me. She didn't talked to me for a week afterwards, until a few days ago.

Today she looked kinda sad/pissed at something so at some point I asked: did something happen, you look kinda sad? And she said: wtf are you talking about, that's weird?? And made a face that looked like "you're a complete idiot". I was just concerned! A few minutes later she mumbled: even if something did happen I wouldn't tell you anyways...

She's still my deskmate in school and talks to me when she wants something.... or during the time when she wasn't helping me she was repeating a test in history of art and wanted me help her in at least half of the questions and finally got a 4 (that equals a C in USA)... even then I helped her, see? I forgive but I don't forget. Am I a too good person?

We used to be great friends and now this... she probably thinks I'm the one who caused all this and she doesn't seem to want to do anything to fix this. She just can't look past her own big ego. And to me such friendship doesn't work because I feel like I'm nobody around her. She accepts no compromise and no ideas from other people if they don't match with hers...


Okay, that was the long story "short". Did I do something wrong? Should I even try to be friends with her again or just drop it and go on? What's your general opinion on this?

Replies
tell me again Posted at 12:03 pm on Nov. 25, 2008
She sounds really self centred, and not ready to hear a different side. You can still be casual friends with her if you can tolerate it, but I don't think there's much you can do in terms of restoring a friendship. She seems too single-minded to have a serious conversation.
Daydreamerangel Posted at 12:00 pm on Nov. 25, 2008
She sounds like a Major bitch, try and sort it out or tell her out is. cuz If i had a friend like dat i would ditch.
MaryLin Posted at 11:56 am on Nov. 25, 2008
No, you're not being rude... I'm glad to see people agreeing with what I think. This friend of mine I talked about seems to be willing to do anything (even forget about our friendship) as long as she gets what she wants and to be honest it's kinda hurting me because we were really close...
Crackbuddy Posted at 11:48 am on Nov. 25, 2008
in my opoinion you didn't do shit wrong!
"typical girl."
im a girl, but what the hell is HER problem!
she's acting like you killed her dog,
or something stupid. wth.
i hate when girls are just bitchy to the MAX,
it gives us all just a bad reputation.

i think you should forget about her.
once she realizes that your not going to put
up with her crap anymore, she'll calm down.

tell her to go get laid or something.

sorry for being rude.

HeavenShallBurn Posted at 11:46 am on Nov. 25, 2008
If she keeps bein like that, drop it and drop her. But if you really view her as a friend, try again... But dont spend to much timne on it  cause then like... your school work may be effected...
Thanantos Posted at 11:44 am on Nov. 25, 2008
that is long i will read it to night and tell you  what i think i gots me a headache right now
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