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Topic Please help... (fairly urgent)
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Original Post
l0k9j8 Posted at 10:27 am on Aug. 21, 2006
huohui

Replies
baby gurl 4u Posted at 11:55 am on Aug. 21, 2006
talk to her. tell her what you told us. It sounds like it would be best for you to get out of there.
Spice Posted at 11:51 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Well, you obviously know what you need to do. The next thing, as I'm sure you know is convincing your mum.

How often can you talk to your mum?

You should mention the workload both of you will experience and that you both need out. Even if it's for you. She should surely know by now that she, and her husband do not seem to be compatible. Especially if she no longer loves him. Even if you can't get a flat, how about a refugee of some sort so your father cannot find you? He shouldn't be trying to control your mum.

Hopefully, very soon your father trying to please your mother will wear out and she will come back to her original state of thinking ...

Good luck, and PM me if you wish to talk further

dragonking Posted at 10:49 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Maybe you should go to the police about the situation if your Dad is being abusive and you want your Mom and you to get away from him.  You should try and say it nicely though to them about just wanting to make peace with him and move out to live somewhere else.  
TMAX Posted at 10:48 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Yes keep doing that but I think you could try to involve somebody else from the family that maybe knows about the situation, or as Jade said involve a trusted person for the family..
jadedxx Posted at 10:46 am on Aug. 21, 2006
If your mom won't listen to you, you need to get someone else involved in the situation. You both deserve better than that, and I'm glad that you've recognized this and are trying to get out. Try talking to an Aunt, Uncle, a trusted friend of the family, etc... if those choices are not available to you, I would suggest talking to your schools counselor.
l0k9j8 Posted at 10:42 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Thanks guys. I've already tried to convince her about the urgency of this situation, but I'm just going to sit her down and keep bringing up the points until she just can't ignore them anymore.
TMAX Posted at 10:38 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Well this will be very hard convincing your mom to move away, you should take a honest conversation with her telling her you can't deal with this next year when you are having a very busy school year and that you will need your internet for the studies etc. And tell her how badly your dad treats your mom even she deserves much better. And explain her that she is only wasting her time, she can't save your dad because she has obviously tried and given him so many chances of changing yet he continues. Tell her that your dad will probably do as before, starting nice but then sliding back to the normal him and starting to treat your mom badly again, and you aswell ofcourse. Your mom sleeps on the floor? that is very ridicilous so your parents don't even sleep together? You should tell her everything you feel and show possible emotions, she must feel sympathy for you aswell. Then I think she will realize that what you and she needs is more important and worth saving while you both can.

I don't know if this advice is usefull but I surely hope.. Take care hunny  

kingofclubs Posted at 10:32 am on Aug. 21, 2006
This is a bigger issue than you should be asking on LW. You're not going to help with the insight needed to change your home situation. I suggest talking to your school counselor about your options. I will say this though, your mom is being very irresponsible. It is her obligation to protect you from your dad. Frankly, it pisses me off that she is being so weak and irrational. Make a vow to yourself right now to never be that way.
DarkSecretKeeper121 Posted at 10:31 am on Aug. 21, 2006
Could you go to a counselor? Maybe they could help you to convince her that you need to leave. It is an unhealthy environment, and she can't feel sorry for him. When someone abusive says, "I'm sorry, and I promise that it will never happen again.", it isn't true. Not that it's their fault, being abusive is a problem in itself. Your dad needs help as well. Maybe anger management?
iplayfutbol Posted at 10:31 am on Aug. 21, 2006
your mother needs serious help. have you yourself sat her down and told her that she cant go on living like this? can you meet ends with your dad? you need to tell your mom that she cant drag you like this and you have a life and all of this shit their putting you through will fuck you up. you need to guilt your dad big time and really get away and forget him forever. ur mother doesnt feel sorry for your dad, she;s putting herself down. get someone to talk to your mom she needs some sense knocked into her. she's honestly being very selfish and needs to think of you.
iimjustbadnews Posted at 10:29 am on Aug. 21, 2006
pretty mcuh explain to her what you just mentioned to us. it made sence to me, and make her understand that this fighting isnt the best thing for your family
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