-- Posted by aGIRLunknown at 8:55 pm on June 28, 2008 I started cutting on Aug 23, 2007. This is the day that I left for college. I never thought I would ever cut. I have never felt so much guilty pleasure in my life. With each cut I feel the stress lifting off my shoulders. I feel the endoephans rising in me it gives me so much of a high that I don't need to smoke right now. I sat in my dorm room for almost 3 months before I steped out into the college scean. I left school because I got wraped up in Smoking pot, drinking and cutting. My parents blame my boyfriend for me leaving school they think that I left so that I could be closer to him.   I stoped cutting for almost 7 months. I moved in with my boyfriend His mom went to Jail- I cut 1 slit His mother is making him move to P.A- I cut 4 times I have many feelings of hate twords my mother, his mother (I still love her she was there for me when my mother wasn't), and a few of my friends I don't know why I carved my boyfriend's name on my knee, His mom saw it and asked what happened I told her I wrote on my self with a dead pen (she bought it) So I started cutting in places were no one would see. My mistake- I cut my left wrist and my sister noticed told her husband, then told my father. MY father said nothing to me. My mom just notised today (almost a week later) She has said nothing to me yet. I don't want her to. I want to stop but I rather cut myself then drink or smoke pot at times. I have taken 2 shots of 80% proof vodkka.   If I didn't drink I would never be telling anyone. Owell   Just Don't Judge Me -- Posted by MushroomSatsujin at 8:56 pm on June 28, 2008 So you rather do more harmful things to yourself? Ok then... -- Posted by ehmusic at 8:58 pm on June 28, 2008 Quote: from aGIRLunknown at 11:55 pm on June 28, 2008 100% proof vodkka.   100 proof? that'd be 50% alcohol... what are you talking about? I have cut for about four years, I'm in the process of quitting again right now, If you want to talk, feel free to message me. -- Posted by JustaKid at 8:58 pm on June 28, 2008 i know what you mean i cut every once in a while when really upset or depressed... the physical pain takes the mental and emotional pain away -- Posted by aysel star at 8:58 pm on June 28, 2008 Cutting has sort of become my anti-drug too. I've been a month and 3 weeks sober from coke. Cutting helps me release stress. I used to do it for years and stopped for a while. I recently started doing it again (last week). I get you. Just be sure to take precautions when cutting. Use clean blades and don't cut too deep in areas where large veins are located. -- Posted by aGIRLunknown at 9:01 pm on June 28, 2008 Quote: from ehmusic at 11:58 pm on June 28, 2008 Quote: from aGIRLunknown at 11:55 pm on June 28, 2008 100% proof vodkka. 100 proof? that'd be 50% alcohol... what are you talking about?   I have cut for about four years, I'm in the process of quitting again right now, If you want to talk, feel free to message me. SORRY IT WAS 80% I mis read it...lol -- Posted by RJXfuturerocker at 9:01 pm on June 28, 2008 okayy.. so like any person would im gonna tell you that youu really shouldnt cut because your dangering your life. cutting is a security blanket for youu because you dont know how else to handle your problems. try to look for some new habits [not harmful ones] thts all i can really think to say -- Posted by aGIRLunknown at 9:05 pm on June 28, 2008 I understand that I need get better "hobbies" but I don't cut deep. I cut to were it bleeds enough for me to feel the endorphins. mmm what a feeling...... -- Posted by ehmusic at 9:29 pm on June 28, 2008 Quote: from aGIRLunknown at 12:05 am on June 29, 2008 I understand that I need get better "hobbies" but I don't cut deep. I cut to were it bleeds enough for me to feel the endorphins. mmm what a feeling...... Don't do it anywhere visible. I'm not saying it's ok, but, If you must do it, do it so that the scars aren't gonna be seen, cause, no matter how deep you don't cut, there will still be scars.