-- Posted by tattookiss at 3:41 pm on July 9, 2008 Purging. I know its wrong but I think Im starting to become addicted. I just dont know  what to do any more. Lately I have been doing it once a day and sometimes twice. Im not some crazy eating disorder teen and most of the time I have no problem with my body but for some reason I just feel fat all the time now. When I was little, growing up was hard and I was constantly teased about my weight but I never resorted to purging. Sometime during middle school I started to think that there was nothing wrong with my body and I was beautiful no matter what people said. Eventually the teasing became less and less but there was still the little words people would throw at me but I dealt with it.  For the past six months it completely stopped all together but then someone I dont even know told me boyfriend that I looked fat. This little girl who is three years younger than me and looks like she weighs 5 lbs and has never talked to me and I have only seen once calls me fat. For some reason that just stuck with me and I almost cried. Thats when I started to purge. I thought once wasnt going to hurt anything but then I just keep doing it. I dont do it for every meal just when I feel really full. Im not going to lie, I like food but I a lot of the time I just dont know how to stop when it tastes so good. My boyfriend of 9months tells me he doesnt think Im fat but when he does happen to mention that he thinks a girls hot sh always seems to be really skinny. Plus he is a really skinny guy with a lot of muscle who can fit into a lot of my cloths. I work out every morning and Im in a lot of sports but I never seem to get any healthier. It is all driving me crazy. I dont want to purge and I hate myself for doing it. I cant go to any one I know for help and Im afraid to tell my friends and family. I dont know what to do.   -- Posted by bengali at 3:44 pm on July 9, 2008 dude man... its going to be hard for you to stop, bt i think you shuold.. if u want to  and need motivation to stop purging, then google and research the negative effects... i support you dude.. yay -- Posted by tattookiss at 3:51 pm on July 9, 2008 Quote: from bengali at 3:44 pm on July 9, 2008 dude man... its going to be hard for you to stop, bt i think you shuold.. if u want to and need motivation to stop purging, then google and research the negative effects... i support you dude.. yay thanks Ill do that and just so you know with all the 'dude' comments Ill just assume you are just saying that and you know Im a girl -- Posted by bengali at 3:52 pm on July 9, 2008 i know ur a girl.. i jsut say dude.. -- Posted by ehmusic at 3:55 pm on July 9, 2008 I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time with your body image.  Bulimia, which is what this is, is addictive.  You may not really like what I have to say, but I wouldn't feel right with myself if I didn't say it.  This is an eating disorder.  But don't let that define you.  Try and stop now, before you get in it too deep. Working out every morning, like you're doing, and playing sports is awesome.  You need to realize that you don't need to purge to be healthy, in fact, it's probably going to end up making you sick.  Try eating healthy, if you feel like you're getting overweight.  Anytime that you feel like purging, try going for a little run, or just eating a small, healthy snack. I hope that this has helped you, at least a little bit. Message me, if you need to talk. -- Posted by dragonking at 4:07 pm on July 9, 2008 You should really talk to your family and tell them how you feel and what you have been doing.  Ask them for help to stop doing that.