-- Posted by Raging Inferno at 12:56 am on July 15, 2008 I want to do it. I want to feel some release from this. Even if it became an addiction. I want it to go away so badly, you don't know  how much. Even for a few seconds. What the fuck is wrong with me? Can't stop these urges, to do something to turn the pain into something I can deal with for once. But it will only get worse won't it? I have no one to turn to, all those I might tell will turn from me. They'll leave me to do it. None of these pieces of shit....fucking care. Not like anything matters. I've become too disconnected from my own feelings for a very long time. I am already fucked up. I don't feel properly anymore. I feel nothing.