-- Posted by somelikeitred at 3:49 am on July 24, 2008 Talk about complicated. I will try to keep this simple. Guy 1: I met him first, I thought he was super cute, intelligent and extremely nice. He sings in the band. Guy 2: I lost my virginity to him, I'm really into him and he is gorgeous and extremely intelligent. He plays guitar. Both of these guys used to be in the same band. I have never done anything with Guy 1, we only talk through AIM once in awhile, text each other randomly and hang out on even more rare occasions. Guy 1 is always asking me to go out with him and tells me how much he likes me. Guy 2 and I have a long history, he told me he really liked me and we started talking but he then said he didn't want a relationship. We lost our virginity to each other but I feel as if he is at a point in his life where he doesnt really know what he wants, he is experimenting and confused and stressed a lot. However...Guy 2 asked me not to talk to Guy 1 because he is, "an idiot". Basically....Guy 2 he doesn't want to be in a relationship with me but he doesn't want me to talk to other guys? As I had mentioned...they are in the same band. Guy 2 (the one I had sex with), once told me how he had been really into this girl about a year ago and after introducing her to his band she started dating his bass player....LESS THAN A WEEK LATER...and he didn't want the same thing to happen again with another girl he liked....He told me the girl he was into tried to kiss him once and he pulled away because it was his initial reaction....and now he regrets it....and this girl he says completely ignores him. We have sex sometimes...Guy 2 and I.....I don't know how he really feels about me honestly...For a fact I know he USED to like me a lot....he might still feel like that, but we don't really talk about it anymore...I don't know if I should keep holding on in hopes that he will change or pull away completely and see if the old saying is true..."absence makes the heart grow fonder" And what about Guy 1? I don't know if I should even give him a chance? I think he's cute, he's super nice, I enjoy spending time with him....but as GAY AS THIS SOUNDS....part of me doesn't want to hurt Guy 2 the same exact way he was hurt before. I hate that I'm considerate.... -- Posted by cheesygod at 3:52 am on July 24, 2008 Guy 2 sounds like someone who'd annoy the hell out of me. I dunno. He sounds like a big whiny baby. Give guy 1 a chance. You have a life. Live it. -- Posted by Lepperking at 3:53 am on July 24, 2008 Interesting. It seems like you could destroy the friendship the two have with your decision. -- Posted by somelikeitred at 3:55 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from Lepperking at 6:53 am on July 24, 2008 Interesting. It seems like you could destroy the friendship the two have with your decision. They already hate each other because I 'bother with the other'; My choice with Guy 1 will only really hurt the friendship I have with Guy 2. -- Posted by shutter bugs at 3:55 am on July 24, 2008 i almost cried...I think i need sleep ANYWAY talk to guy 2 about it, tell him you like guy1 but he doesn't want to hurt him but he doesn't like you so, its complicated, talk to him, tell him exactly what you want and think and that you value you friendship but want to be able to have freedom. if you really like guy1 but care about guy2 tell him that and see what happens i guess. hope that helped -- Posted by cheesygod at 4:00 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from somelikeitred at 3:55 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from Lepperking at 6:53 am on July 24, 2008 Interesting. It seems like you could destroy the friendship the two have with your decision. They already hate each other because I 'bother with the other'; My choice with Guy 1 will only really hurt the friendship I have with Guy 2. Well Guy 2 sure seems to like his control. He's not allowed to hog you all to himself if he's not going to even do it properly. I mean geez he doesn't want a relationship, goes and tries something with a girl and fails because he has no idea what he is doing and then goes and asks you not to talk to this other guy? A troublesome fellow to be friends with isn't he? -- Posted by somelikeitred at 4:03 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from cheesygod at 7:00 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from somelikeitred at 3:55 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from Lepperking at 6:53 am on July 24, 2008 Interesting. It seems like you could destroy the friendship the two have with your decision.    They already hate each other because I 'bother with the other'; My choice with Guy 1 will only really hurt the friendship I have with Guy 2. Well Guy 2 sure seems to like his control. He's not allowed to hog you all to himself if he's not going to even do it properly. I mean geez he doesn't want a relationship, goes and tries something with a girl and fails because he has no idea what he is doing and then goes and asks you not to talk to this other guy? A troublesome fellow to be friends with isn't he? You're very right..I guess it's just hard letting go. Especially when they were your first...but I know what I have to do.. -- Posted by cheesygod at 4:26 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from somelikeitred at 4:03 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from cheesygod at 7:00 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from somelikeitred at 3:55 am on July 24, 2008 Quote: from Lepperking at 6:53 am on July 24, 2008 Interesting. It seems like you could destroy the friendship the two have with your decision.     They already hate each other because I 'bother with the other'; My choice with Guy 1 will only really hurt the friendship I have with Guy 2.    Well Guy 2 sure seems to like his control.    He's not allowed to hog you all to himself if he's not going to even do it properly. I mean geez he doesn't want a relationship, goes and tries something with a girl and fails because he has no idea what he is doing and then goes and asks you not to talk to this other guy? A troublesome fellow to be friends with isn't he? You're very right..I guess it's just hard letting go. Especially when they were your first...but I know what I have to do.. Whatever you do make sure that you think it is the right thing. It's never a good idea to do something that you know is wrong. -- Posted by K r e s c e n d o at 4:45 am on July 24, 2008 You can kill two birds with one stone, here. Basically, You're going to end one thing to save another. Who do you see living your life with? Guy 1 or 2? -- Posted by xcutioners at 3:51 pm on July 25, 2008 You're pretty much fucked. You + Guy 2 = Guy 1 jealous, angry, disappointed You + Guy 1 = Guy 2 over his head How about none of the above and find someone else?